"If you even think about writing a review I will hunt you down and cut your balls off!!!"
It had just been the hottest sex of my life. Easy request to comply with but the way she said it still deeply frightened me.all true!
"hey.....your dick has......character."
"sorry there aren't any more towels. The guy that just left must have used the last one."
"do you take viagra?" (I was still fully clothed at the time)
"what was your name again??" (at the end of our time together)
Despite an occasional buzzkill, I want to thank the incredible, smart, beautiful women that I've met through the years. You saved my life and rocked my world!!
She show up and during the session I find out that its that time of the month so my menu is limited. This is from a regular girl. She could of called a head of time and asked me if it was alright.
Dude I am so wasted today.
Do you have a rubber on hand oh that box is open already we can not use those. so no sex for you but it will be full price.
I know I should update my picture just don't have the time for it.
All of these I don't see anymore because of this.
"Wow. You're smart, successful, sexy. You've got great genes! Imagine that."
"If I got pregnant, would you want me to keep it?"
"Be careful. I'm ovulating!"
"You're much nicer than the guy who just left."
*alarm clock sounds* "Our session will be ending in ten minutes."
"Wow. I bet you're quite a walking ATM aren't you?"
I have many more lol
-- Modified on 1/17/2017 5:41:54 PM
That looks like a penis, only smaller
Guess I'm super lucky, I actually haven't heard a single one of these..
"You Are The Father."
"If you even think about writing a review I will hunt you down and cut your balls off!!!"
It had just been the hottest sex of my life. Easy request to comply with but the way she said it still deeply frightened me.
yeah that was a little over the top
When you pre-pay or lend someone $ and they promise to pay you back.
And they tell you "don't worry, I would never screw you over, I'm not like that"
I got screwed over a few times, both in this and in my personal life. The difficult part is when you trust someone and they let you down. 😪
It ruins it for the good people that can really use the help.
Just a thought.
......went to see a former porn star, thought this will be fantastic.
She talked for 40 min of an hour appointment...fully clothed. My thinking was she is well reviewed and one reviewer stated she talks a great deal yet compensats by going over the hour.
NOT SO! She looks at clock and goes, "Oh my, we better get going....we only have time for bbbj" Requested another 30 min given the length of her conversation, "Sure Hun, for another $200"!
I learned my lesson that day.....
"You look familiar.....Uncle Bob?!??!!?"
"You're nice. You wouldn't believe the creeps I get." (Proceeds to tell me about creeps.)
"I'm sorry I'm stressed. My dealer took my money and only gave me half of what I ordered."
"All of my compliments are genuine. I mean, it's like if I told you you had a huge dick you'd know I was lying, right?"
"No, noon will be fine. I only need 10 minutes between appointments."
"I enjoy this job. I'm pretty good at relaxing and going with the flow because I learned how to dissociate when I was younger." (sadly, I'm not making this up)
"where did the condom go? Oh, it must have slipped off inside of me. It's OK though, I'm on birth control"
firebird headed straight to the clinic for testing, repeated 8 weeks later,(this was years ago) all OK. Whew
Take-away, don't let her slap a Magnum on you when you're not a Magnum kind of guy.
Though I'm not shocked by any of that, it does make we wonder, like you; why? Or perhaps this is why I've always stuck to GFE/GND incalls. I enjoy (no disassociating!) providing that calm eye in the center of a man's daily or weekly storm of Life. Shower? No problem, fresh towels and toiletries (yes, you will be the first person to use a new un-wrapped bar of soap and a laundered, dryer fresh towel).
A provider may speak on some details of their personal life, but this is a relationship, one of sacred trust. So you should never hear talk of someone else or be burdened by someone else's trials. I'm here to listen to your woes, a confidant and venting option. Much like a bartender, but with different libations to wet your whistle.
I guess my point is, to put it plainly, what you pay me for is to be treated like you're my only concern. Ever was, ever will be, and always committed. And I take a certain pride in knowing I do well by a guest.
I assume like the different quality in character of a guest, providers can come in an ever greater set of hues and tones.
The trick is in finding a flattering color scheme.
Also, I'm not trying to say I'm better or talking down on others. I was (failingly) trying to build rapport with this local forum. Sorry if I offended anyone. :/
I have actually said those things. In light humor / sarcasm obviously.
Because? Those are BABIES in there! Be careful!
The looks on their faces were priceless, hilarious, and they keep coming back because we laugh, and I give them "the talk". Light and fluffy. While I have a paragard IUD, and I know most ladies here are careful, you only need it to happen once. Avoids them popping "can I just put the tip in bare once" question.
Be careful out there!
"But she was on birth control! She said so!"
Nuh uh honey. Wear protection.
Humorously communicating boundaries makes dates fun, hilarious, but informative. Not to be said all the time, but we've had some ROTFLMAO moments after blurting that out, and some have thanked me for the "raising awareness" reminder jokes.
Xoxo
-- Modified on 1/21/2017 4:30:23 PM
what happens in session be it what the guy says or another female. Hence why you have not had any quotes added by provides.
As gentlemen you pay us for discretion, and I am personally glad that no provider choose to step over that line.
Some of those are funny, some sad, and some make me wonder. I have said boneheaded things, so have many guests and providers. You know those moments where you just can't help it, stupid just falls right out. Hopefully most instances that aren't harmful can be laughed about after...