I have, in my early days, fucked three women for a reasonable price (300 range) who were just okay as far as looks. Two of the three were quite satisfactory experiences, while the third ended up as a quick, motionless fuck of a chunky, heavily tatooed woman, after a wearing three hours of conversation. So 4 hours and $300 down then drain that I can never get back.
Not sure I would do that again - am taking a more deliberate approach now, letting it play out slower, but on balance that was good. If I wanted to get fucked quickly for a good price again, I might do that. Very much agree with number 3. I have walked from a few 200 meet ups for coffee, tho if she is hot enough I would pay something to prove I am real, maybe 50-100 though, just to cover expenses. zigAs a prelude to this subject matter, i.e, Allowance, its discussion or lack there of, admittedly I was not very good at it when I started dabbling in the SD/SB realm back in late 2011. In fact I am now very aware that I simply blew some golden opportunities to get laid by playing a players game rather than tackling this subject with strength and authority.
Since getting back into the "game" recently with less self-imposed pressure to get laid and taking my time to prospect and to qualify the prospect in order to cultivate (or to score putting it crudely), I have come to realize that most of these aspiring SB have no Eff'ing clue as to what it is that they exactly want. Am I surprised but this? Well, not any more! As a side note, please bear in mind that this excludes the "pro-abs" and the quasi-hookers who know exactly as to what they want but as to whether they get what they want or not, is an entirely different matter.
I have now come to realize that I do much better in terms of transitioning from that awkward qualifying to cultivation (or closing) phase, if I take charge and go on the offensive so to speak and ask them as to what it is that they/she wan(s)? You will be surprised as to how many start gushing, blushing, mumbling and stumbling. Further, I follow that up by saying that I would not be doing this without some form of financial arrangement in place or agreed upon because I do not wish for this to be misinterpreted as a traditional dating situation.
Note that a lot of SBs whether aspiring or veterans of SA don't actually end up in too many sugar relationships and end up seeing a few guys here and there who make them experience everything from dating with perks, i.e, all paid for dates, presents, trips, etc to full one P4P propositions and nothing else! There is a wide gamut in between these two and the experienced SD can perhaps capitalize on the individual's situation to strike the best allowance deal as possible. IMHO, it is still possible to find someone who will agree to see you on a more steady basis and who will accept 200-300 to see you BCD and will also enjoy being your date and have fun with you by way of stimulating conversations, flirtations, nights out on the town, luncheon dates, morning coffee and so forth. Some of these relationships can turn into a loosely bound BF/GF relationships but the allowance is an insurance policy against boundaries being crossed.
We have often brushed upon Unicorn SBs but they are out there. The chances of landing one entirely depend on your own skills set and luck! The younger that they are, there's less chance of this for the obvious reasons. On the other end of the scales, the older that they are the odds are also heavily stacked up against such a scenario because life's struggles become so prevalent which prevent chances to be given to a quasi normal relationship. As we have talked about this again and again, the sweet spot is from 25 to 35 give or take ae +-2!
To Sweetman who brought up this question in a thread or so below:
I personally do not see anything wrong with this if you feel that the commensurate is not to your expectations just like the SB can try (and most likely will try) to renegotiate the allowance if your expectations exceed the originally agreed upon arrangement. I always see the relationship dynamic as fluid with a bit of room to stretch or to contract. That said, you run the chance of losing a good SB for being too transactional all the time if one is a consummate deal seeker / deal maker.
I've heard from long time SDs that they cut back on the original deal all the time and the question as to whether it pisses off the SBs, yes sure it may and probably will but you can not compare a wide-eyed SA SB to a pro hooker in those terms. I don't balme the hookers for getting extremely irate with the consummate hagglers and negotiators as they clearly advertise a rate where the supply/demand curve justifies or dismisses their rates. In the SB world there are no set rates. It's a very fluid realm and hence as to why they will be very willing to drop you and prospect for a new SD!
They sure sre fluid situations. Met my 25 uo SB at the beach yesterday. Hadn't seen her in 10 days and I was thinking I was getting yhe heave ho. She shows up quite late. I told her she can pull that crap with others but not me. So after a couple hours at the beach I said I was making dinner and she is more than welcome to come over. She said ok but said she only had her bikini to wear. Lol. Not a problem.
We get to my place and I suggest a shower. I suggest a shower together. No. I finish preparing dinner and she comes out all clean. Then I hop in and clean off. When I vome out I SAID id give her a massge. 10 minutes later ive got her naked. Her ass up in the air legs spread. She is begging me to dive in. About an jour later we are exhausted . She takes a . I eat dinner with a big smile on my face. The next morning I buy her a bunch of keurig pods. Cost? $40.
Whatever you do, do NOT specifically address the exact allowance which you are prepared to pay during email / direct email / text / phone calls, even if refraining from doing so will end the "prospect". I have found out that SBs feel awkward discussing this matter in person and naturally would prefer to convey their desires when they are not dealing with you face-to-face.
If you have not met and they insist on getting to know your number before they get to know you, let them either go or go simmer down by telling them that you DO NOT enter into an arrangement sight unseen! If you have met them and then during the communication they would like to know the allowance sum, be vague and DO NOT offer P4P numbers even though the de facto arrangement / allowance will be P4P. Give a monthly number or something.
Lastly, avoid long phone conversations before you meet. Ideally, do not even talk to them on the phone before you meet. Every darn time I got suckered into this shyte and then I loathe myself afterwards because I know that I totally wasted time. Brief email messages and texts only.
There's a lot of good food for thought here. After lots of trial and error and years of regular Sugar experience I have come to the opposite conclusion. I never meet a girl unless an exact allowance or per visit gift which I am prepared to pay has been discussed! Wasting time on the phone is bad enough. But meeting and wining and dining a potential SB only to discover that you and her are not even on the same planet, let alone in the same ballpark, is just too annoying. Worse yet, and this is a real personal experience, by the time the drinks and food and flirtations were enjoyed and we were actually driving to the hotel I discovered she insisted on more than I was planning to pay! By then I was thinking with the little head and wound up having a wonderful experience that cost much more than I had planned. I promised myself I'd never make that particular mistake again. As always, ymmv.
As a former "player" in my more youthful days who still have my bag of personal skills and tricks, I prefer face to face because I can for the most part overwhelm them or hand with them, if they are not overtly afflicted with the GPS disease or if they smell and look like pot! If they are just C*nts and misandering manhaters, who are in this for a battle, I just kick 'em to the curb and leave the situation. Bye!
Otherwise, I can also play the mind games and the longer game as long as I have my go to relief and release valves so that I do nor allow their feminine beauty tale over my male logic and rationale. Yeah, we can talk all we want about allowance online till the cows come home but none of that means squat till we meet up in person. I had someone hit me with "Moderate", i.e, the 5K per month and instead of telling her that was a sum belonging to dreamland and fantasyland, I just told her that physically and time wise I was just unable to see her 3 times a week or 12 times a month based on her desired allowance! The baffled look on the face was priceless as the little hamster was very hard at work in her dome trying to decipher as to what it was that I had just told her ...
1. If I'm not sure about the pics. Pass. Last thing I want to do is meet a lady that I wouldn't fuck for free much less buy her anything.
2. We better be within a couple hundred on a per meet basis or im out.
3. If im shelling out money its only going to happen after fucking.
Im lucky to live in an area with lots of college coeds and shit loads of hot latinas. I may lose some by my rules but cutting the bullshit saves time and money.
Most importantly is these are guidelines. Super hot gets some leeway. Just like real life.
I have, in my early days, fucked three women for a reasonable price (300 range) who were just okay as far as looks. Two of the three were quite satisfactory experiences, while the third ended up as a quick, motionless fuck of a chunky, heavily tatooed woman, after a wearing three hours of conversation. So 4 hours and $300 down then drain that I can never get back.
Not sure I would do that again - am taking a more deliberate approach now, letting it play out slower, but on balance that was good. If I wanted to get fucked quickly for a good price again, I might do that.
Very much agree with number 3. I have walked from a few 200 meet ups for coffee, tho if she is hot enough I would pay something to prove I am real, maybe 50-100 though, just to cover expenses.
zig
I have been following the more direct tack - let's talk money up front - with almost everyone. But I am not convinced and will try this approach as an alternative. As unattractive as my wrinkled face and fat gut may be, I dress up okay, listen attentively and have a certain mellow, confident demeanor. At least I think I do as it seems do the ladies I meet. With one exception, they have all seemed much more interested after meeting. This seems to suggest my negotiating position improves at that point, so I may be better off if I wait.
There does seem to be this implicit suggestion in discussions that "I need X dollars from one guy, so you either need to give me that or I can't see you" with a lot of ladies. How many do you think really limit themselves to seeing one guy, and is there any way to tell? Not talking about the hookers, of course. If a lady is willing to see more than one guy, or at least see me while she is hunting for the big tuna who will make her whole (pun intended), then she is going to be very flexible. But if she is serious about just finding that one guy with the big $$$s and has the charm and looks to make that happen, seems to know what she is doing, then I am wasting my time.
I did try to explain to one very attractive woman that I was not prepared to enter into some bidding war for her attention, that she either needed to want to spend time with me or not, and if she did we would figure out how to make it work. She took a pass, so that did not work. Honesty and full disclosure only go so far.
zig
Most PEOPLE spend a lot of time telling themselves one thing, while doing something completely different. Match.com does follow up survey to see how well someone's wish list matches up with people they end up dating, particularly those who end up in a relationship. The correlation is pretty low, less than a 50% match.
That's because most boys want to fuck their mommies and most girls want to fuck their daddies, but no one wants to admit that.
zig