I'm so glad we don't have to worry here in the UK that a client might be LE!
I would say, yes, after the clothes come off. I think that would be easier for you then asking about different things throughout the session.
Good luck, I really hope the advice you've received helps you to enjoy future sessions more 
xxx
I know I shouldn't take this sort of thing personally, but I can't help it . . .
I've now seen 3 well-reviewed providers with high performance marks, and, based on TER reviews, it seems like I'm not getting nearly as much mileage as other reviewers do. I was an awkward teenager, so I don't have a great self-image/confidence (which partially explains why I'm with a provider), but I've been told that nowadays I'm a good-looking guy (sometimes people ask if I'm an actor). I'm 40 y.o., basically in good shape (athletic, but maybe 10 - 15 lbs overweight), great sense of humor, successful career in Hollywood, respectful/polite, dressed sharp, freshly showed, and my oral skills have been complimented by these same providers.
What the fuck am I doing wrong?
Is it because many of these reviewers are posting their 2nd or 3rd or 4th encounters with providers, where there is more familiarity between them? Am I not being aggressive enough about asking for more mileage? Do the providers not read their own reviews?
Sorry to turn this into a therapy session, but I would feel a whole lot better if I wasn't alone in this.
You asked to perform certain things and were refused, or whether you just expected the provider to perform these things because her reviews said that she did them.
If the former, then that is a problem and I'm not sure if it's good form to ask her why or not, but I can certainly see why you would be upset.
On the other hand, if you don't even ask, then I have to quote the old refrain: "Ask and ye shall receive."
It has usually worked for me.
Thank you, mrfisher. Even in middle age, I'm still very shy and awkward around women, and I appreciate the providers' concerns about conversations that might get them in trouble with LE, so you are correct that I didn't have specifically ask for certain things, but I did make it clear that I was familiar with their reviews.
but you'd never know it now.
Let me tell you of a situation that has occurred on more than one occasion.
During the heat of a heavy lovemaking session, I have made a suggestion to do something kinky that was never on the provider's menu. This is done in a light hearted, almost kidding way, so there is no pressure put on her. Almost invariably, the provider will smile and decline the offer.
But here's what happened: A seed was planted.
Germinate this seed with kindness and charm and guess what may happen?
Not the next, and probably not the second, but soon, she may suggest the deed herself and perform it.
The trick is to let the provider think about it and be curious, then as she feels safer with you, her natural curiosity and horniness will do the rest. (Believe it or not, the good providers are just as horny as we are!)
I have had this happen over a half dozen times and it is a wonderful outgrowth of developing a relationship.
Another maxim to consider: "Good things come to those who are patient."
that is setting the service level.
Some guys won't see a provider that gives a covered blow job and others seek the added hygiene of said.
It is difficult for a provider to clairvoyantly surmise whether any first time client is comfortable with a prostate massage or whether the guy will bolt like a deer from a firecracker.
If you are seeking uninhibited wanton abandon perhaps you taking a proactive approach will pique the prurient actions you seek from your provider.
You have to let her know what you are wanting, hoping, expecting.
Here are a couple of tactics:
1) Take charge!!! Let her know what you want, and take the lead in getting what you want, of course if she says I don't do that, back off.
2) If you are nervous, ask for help. If you are unsure how to move from point A to point B, let her know what you are hoping for, and ask her for suggestions, she has likely been with newbies before, and will know how to please you. That is her profession afterall!!!
Great advice, jazz32. Thank you.
Have you reviewed your personal hygiene? Perhaps you have a condition that results in some foul odor, etc. I recently changed deodorant, and even I didn't want to be around myself. It happens, even to those that shower regularly, but it doesn't mean that someone wants to get too close.
Another possibility is that the reviewers are embellishing, and you haven't learned to translate. Remember, if a guy gives everyone he sees a 10-10, chances are you could be disappointed.
Or maybe it's when I weep tears of blood. (A little "Casino Royale" humor, for those who have seen it.)
Pretty sure it's not the hygiene, acidom, but it's a valid point. But I've been told I smell good. And I have a very healthy diet, so I don't get that smelly sweat.
Yes, the abundance of 10s of TER are a problem, but I've only seen providers with A LOT of reviews. But I'll be the first to admit that I often suffer from impossibly high expectations.
Thank you for your comments.
I second jazz32's comments.
Try to communicate to her what you want and, if you have the confidence, take the lead. If not, feel free to mention you've read her great reviews, found them a turn-on and have been looking forward to a exploring with her some of the things described in the reviews.
If you are nervous then tell her this as well, it's OK and all providers have seen nervous clients and should be able to take the lead if you can't.
Finally, I know it's hard but try not to take it too personally and let it dent your confidence.
Fantastic advice, Carrie_of_London! I especially like your idea of asking her to explore some of the things described in the reviews. Somehow, that's much easier for a shy person like me to say, rather than phrases likes, "I want to . . ."
I do wonder when it is appropriate to have that conversation. Even though I work in the entertainment industry, the provider has to treat me as if I might be LE. Do you have any suggestions as to when one might try to time this discussion? Perhaps after the clothes come off, proving that I am a legit client? Or just making a suggestion here or there, throughout the session?
you have set down the envelope, gotten "comfortable" and had a few moments of chat to break the ice.
A good segue is something like:
"How do you command all those wonderful reviews?"
or:
"The things described in your reviews [feel free to insert specifics] are the stuff of my fantasies. Let's make them happen."
If this doesn't get your point across, then I don't know what will.
Read Korn's point below about how some providers will want to see a person several times before giving them the "good stuff".
I have experienced this also and maybe you need to settle on a select few promising candidates and cultivate your relationship with them.
I'm so glad we don't have to worry here in the UK that a client might be LE!
I would say, yes, after the clothes come off. I think that would be easier for you then asking about different things throughout the session.
Good luck, I really hope the advice you've received helps you to enjoy future sessions more xxx
note that just because someone is well reviewed, that does not mean
1. Their performance is always up to par
2. You have done anything wrong
3. There is some semblance of chemistry between you
Could go on and on and one... listen to advice above which is right on the money... ask, be honest and say you are hesitant about what to request...
I have had more than one session with highly reviewed ladies and the reviews on them were not so good - attitude that day, general performance, whatever... yes, we all have rotten days, but a true professional will know that and avoid poor performance... when I am having a shitty day, I am careful not to let it show and often go overboard in the other direction, providing great service to my client base in my chosen profession.
Go figure... very true, YMMV.
Sure, I agree with several posters who say communication is important. But it may not be enough. It often takes time before a provider is comfortable enough, and knows you well enough, to perform the way the reviews indicate.
I have been at this hobby for about 25 years. It only turned really good after I began seeing providers time after time. Since then, I have built up relationships with some providers which were unmatched in the past.
It starts out: "Love Goddess, Am I fictem" (sic)...and is by Well Reviewed Provider.
I think it is so ironic that it is running at the same time as your thread here.
Kind of a parallel universe situation, eh wot?
I believe what you describe might happen to everybody, because your expectations are not necessarily the same as those of the reviewers your read. Also providers might be tired sometimes and have a lack of energy to play the game and relax with you, but it's not about you… I recently met with a provider who was very cold at the beginning of the cession, it was really difficult for me, but then I talk to her a lot, showing interest for her and she warmed up a lot and we ended with a nice relationship. I'm quite new in the hobby and I can tell you there are no more than 2 to 3 girls I would come back to among 15… and they all had good reviews… It doesn't mean I didn't have a good time at all, but it's a general feeling… I am sure some reviewer, as someone said, do exagerate a lot… you know… men…
Here's a little idea ...
You are a quiet man, yet interested in obtaining YOUR fantasy! In your fantasy, are you a quiet reserved guy? I bet not! Live your fantasy man! You are paying to have a fantasy fullfilled! (Remember she doesn't know that you are the meek and mild Clark Kent...show her Superman) Walk into the place like you own it, treat her like she is the total object of your desire .. tell her she is stunning .. then tell her what you two are going to do together! I can tell you this...when a man I am with is moaning with pleasure, that means I am working and I want to give hime more! And honey...I ENJOY it!
By the way...hygine is important include your teeth in that as well. I had a guy with a breath odor from a cavity. It was almost unbearable to kiss him! Crest white strips...brushing, flossing and mouthwash ... before you visit your fantasy girl pop in a few mints. Just my two cents!
[edited by mod]
-- Modified on 12/1/2006 6:36:06 AM