The Erotic Highway

Setting up a Sugar Date
Zangari 3007 reads
posted

Ok, so you're on a sugar site, looking for a prospective SB.  You need to exercise good judgment here, because your money is on the line. Here are a few suggestions, I hope this helps:

1. Selection:  When you check an SB's profile, her photos should be consistent.  She should look like the same girl in every photo.  If she doesn't, then stay away--she's  using old photos from different periods in her life.  Just like in the hobby, some girls lie about their age & appearance.  If her profile is combative or sarcastic, then you already know to stay away.    

2. Offer:  Your first message should be polite & direct.  Say hello & make your pitch,  $100 lunch date, no strings.  Your entire message should be two concise paragraphs.  Include some info about yourself--your age & profession.  Mention something that's in her profile summary--just to show that  you actually read it.  Briefly describe your previous arrangement allowance ($300 per week, once a week).  Don't mention anything about sex.  Offer to send your photos via text or e-mail.  
Include your cell # & e-mail address at the bottom of your msg.  

3. Contact: When she contacts you, send two recent selfies & tell her when they were taken.  Don't send anything explicit.  Ask if her photos are recent. She may not reply.  That means (a) she didn't like your photos or (b) she's not using current photos.  Either way, you've eliminated some trouble.  

4. Her Interrogation:  she may question you.  "What are you're looking for" or "What are your expectations".  This is a warning sign of a time waster.  This is someone you've never met.   You've already offered $100 for a lunch date with no strings.   Politely reiterate the offer--you'd like to meet her and you have no expectations on a first date.  If she continues with her interrogation, don't reply.  If she tries to bump up your offer, don't reply.  

5.  Place & time.  Let her choose the restaurant--you want her to feel comfortable.  She may choose a national chain like Olive Garden (omg).   A lot of College girls are into Sushi bars.   If she can't decide, then you suggest an upscale restaurant that won't be too crowded.  Avoid a "coffee date".  If she can't make time for lunch or dinner with you, then she doesn't have time for you, period.  

Hopefully that will get you a date.  I'll try to post something about Date #1 soon.   --z

Smitty601027 reads

Thanks Zangari,
This was helpful. I just joined a sugar site and have been making some rookie mistakes. It's taken me way too much time to get a handle on the strategy. I have my first "meet up" tomorrow for lunch. I had NOT been including the $$ offer in the initial e-mail and had been asking for "coffee" dates. Interestingly, I have had a few phone conversations with POT SB's so that I could get an idea of what they were like. I have met one for the "meet and greet" although I don't think it's going to work. She's a Part-time stripper and it seems like she just wants to f***. Not, a lot of chemistry. Anyway, keep posting my friend.

Follow this foolish advice, and you'll pay for a lot of time and dinners, lunches, snacks, etc. and never, ever get laid.

Posted By: hyneho

But no way am I paying for a M&G from some youngster that's over inflated the worth of their presence.  I know some guys do, but this sets a pattern that doesn't equal sugar for affection.  I have a sugar baby that I've been with for months, but I've seen many of them and never once paid for a girl to hang out and eat a dinner I've paid for.  This is amateur hour bullshit.

I should point out that I don't treat them as escorts.  If they want to be paid for time, then join the ranks of the ladies that charge for it.

If anyone wants some really good links that have decent advice about this, PM me.  This advice is dreck IMHO.

Zangari1003 reads

Posted By: Gaijin64
Follow this foolish advice, and you'll pay for a lot of time and dinners, lunches, snacks, etc. and never, ever get laid.
 
 To those who still have a firm grip on reality:  A *beautiful* college girl has a boyfriend who's younger & better looking than you.  Why would she go anywhere with you for free--that's what her BF is for.   If you want to lure a goddess to the table, then you need to make an offer.    
   
 To Gaijin64:  just wave your dick around & I'm sure those stunning college girls will come running.    
Posted By: Gaijin64
But no way am I paying for a M&G from some youngster that's over inflated the worth of their presence.  I know some guys do, but this sets a pattern that doesn't equal sugar for affection --snip--
 This lonely man thinks "affection" is something that can be bought.  I hope most of you guys have an SO.  You get affection every day…for free.  That crazy woman actually loves you.  
Posted By: Gaijin64
  I should point out that I don't treat them as escorts.  If they want to be paid for time, then join the ranks of the ladies that charge for it.
 
 One can only stare in wonder at the statement above.  SBs definitely "charge for it".   She's P4P, just like a provider.   The only difference is a provider charges a flat rate for her time. An SB has a variable rate for her time:  allowance + gifts.    
 
Posted By: Gaijin64
 If anyone wants some really good links that have decent advice about this, PM me.  This advice is dreck.
   
 But Gaijin64's advice is so awesome that he can't post it here.  You should PM him immediately.  --z

Zangari1141 reads

In a recent thread on the GD board,  two providers recalled their experience in the sugar bowl.  They eventually gave up,  frustrated by the same time wasters who are now giving you bad advice on this forum.  As you'll see, their posts are quite relevant to this thread.   My favorite quote is from Provider4U:  
   
  "SBs get many many, many e-mails from guys, 95 % of whom have no pics.   Do I have time to meet 20 different guys for drinks, for free?  No."  

   If you want to meet the most beautiful SBs, then you need to put money on the table. A top-tier SB isn't on the site looking for a "free date".  She can get that anytime with young guys her own age.   She's looking for an SD who can take care of her.  Money talks.  The posts below are from Olivia Leon and Provider4U.  To those ladies, thanks for your insight.  --z
     

Posted By: Provider4U
 First dates are a full time job. I tried looking for a SD for about a week, before I gave up out of frustration.  SBs get many, many emails from guys, 95% of whom have no pics and share very little about themselves in their profiles.   The guys want to meet up for a drink right away, to check you out.   Do I have time to meet 20 different guys for drinks, for free?  No.   Who has that amount of free time?    I think $50 for a 30min Starbucks meetup sounds good.
   
Posted By: olivialeon
I From my personal experience, and the experience of three close girlfriends who were doing the same thing at the time: the ones who contacted us on the SD sites.....    
 Over 90% were Time Wasters looking for chat buddies  
 Over 90% sent Pictures looking for compliments, wanting to hear how handsome they were, etc.  
 Over 90% were Picture collectors - wanted us to send nude, sexy photos - Not  
 Over 90% wanted to pay pennies on the dollar for an EXCLUSIVE relationship (code: no condom) and demand  three nights a week, etc.  In my opinion, that's a full blown relationship.  
 Over 90% of the out of town business travelers wanted a beautiful dinner companion, with absolutely NO intention of an arrangement - too cheap to pay an escort  
 Over 90% of the out of town ones expected us to fly to them for a meet and greet for no money, several wanted us for the entire weekend.  
 Over 80% wanted a FREE TEST DRIVE, probably with no intention of an arrangement - just FREE sex  
 Needless to say it was mentally exhausting and not fun anymore.  

RichardLongwood1012 reads

Former SBs who have become pros may not be representative.  They now think that time is money and probably had that mindset as SBs.  

I like about 75% of your guidance.  I have provided suggestions to a couple dozen guys as well.  I'm unsure about a few things, including offering cash to meet.  First, it may attract SBs who are more financially motivated and, thus, more expensive.  It tends to attract the pros and semi-pros, rather than the GND types.  I prefer the latter, though not everyone else does.  The innocent SBs prefer to de-emphasize the money and focus on chemistry.  It may also attract the WYP types who want cash without having to give up sex.  

I think each SD has to evaluate all aspects of his approach.  There likely are common core principles, but some specifics will work better for some guys than others.  Your exact approach may not work well for some guys, because they don't have your looks, game, budget, etc.  They may also be looking for different types of SBs than your are.  I think keeping an open mind is important.  YMMV applies here as well as in the hobby.

Zangari1056 reads

Posted By: RichardLongwood
Your exact approach may not work well for some guys, because they don't have your looks, game, budget, etc.  They may also be looking for different types of SBs than your are.
 Richard, on this point we agree.  I have an SO, so I don't need a quasi-girlfriend.  I'm looking for the hottest girl that I can fuck.  In my town, they're the college girls on the sugar sites. In the game I'm playing, If you can deal with a few rejections, then you will bed girls that are unbelievably hot.  Since I joined a sugar site three years ago, I've fucked more beautiful girls than I have in my entire life, which includes 25 years in the hobby.  
Posted By: RichardLongwood
I'm unsure about a few things, including offering cash to meet…Former SBs who have become pros may not be representative.  They now think that time is money and probably had that mindset as SBs.
 Many college SBs I've met complain about the same things as Provider4U and Olivia Leon:  their mailbox is filled with msgs  from cheap time wasters.   A guy who can stake $100 on a dinner date will get the attention of a top-tier SB.  The guys who can't will usually be ignored.  If $100 is a lot of money to you, then ok. But you're supposed to be loaded, SD (lol).    

 Honestly dudes:  On that first $100 lunch date, I tell an SB that my arrangements are "intimate".  I then wait for her to contact me for Date #2.  If she texts me for Date #2, then she's already made her decision.  We're usually fucking after Date #2.  

Posted By: RichardLongwood
The innocent SBs prefer to de-emphasize the money and focus on chemistry.
 Ok, wow.  "The innocent SBs".   I wonder who you're talking about, Richard.  It sounds like your SB has cast quite a spell over you, lol.  Let's assume she's 18, only has a boyfriend, and is curious about the sugar bowl.  If she joins a sugar site, puts her pix out there, and specifies a "desired allowance", then she's gone P4P.  She doesn't have the experience of a 30 year old provider, but she's hardly 'innocent'.  --

Having a SO (you) and not (me) can make a difference.  

It's interesting that you have had more beautiful girls in the last 3 years than in the prior 25.  That says something about SBs and pros.

There are ways other than offering cash to demonstrate that you are not a time waster.  I may offer cash to see how it works.  At a minimum, I may offer cab fare or Uber.  

$100 is not a lot, but I'm looking for a donation close to $300, so 3 preliminary meets = 1 BCD date.

I'm not loaded.  When my buddy first suggested SA, I thought I'm not a high roller and it's not appropriate for me.  But I learned that I can get a 3-hour, untimed date with an attractive woman for the cost of 1-hour with a pro.  That is the primary appeal for me.

I agree that all the SBs are actually P4P girls, even though their mindset has been different.  In terms of innocence, I'd prefer to have someone who finds me appealing rather than someone who does it purely for the money.  I also prefer the generally lower volume.  Some SBs have only one or a few dates per week.  Many pros have a few per day and have had several hundred guys over a career

Firstly, there is definitely a learning curve process to this SB game and every potential SD out there should really develop their own strategy based on their own social status, income (economics), appearances, marital status, demographics and their "designated" allowance level. Reading a lot about it and getting tips from other seasoned SDs will give you some great (and bad) ideas as to how tailer your own strategy based on the above stated matrix (and metrics) and navigate around Sugar Bowl which can indeed become treacherous for the inexperienced and the faint of heart!

Poster Z seems to live in or near a college town somewhere in the Midwest. This is geographic goldmine primarily for two reasons:

1- the supply side is going to work in your benefit if seeking a Co-Ed

2- economically speaking, you will probably yield more "bang" for you $

Both of the above become a lot more challenging when the geographic tables are tilted in favor of the supply side at the expense of the demand side. That said, I approve of and condone the strategy of making a nominal offer for the first meet, without ANY strings attached. In my own experience, the most successful meets were either a late morning coffee meeting or an early lunch meeting. My max offer for coffee was $50 and $100 for lunch. I usually engineered the coffee meetings toward those who I was not terribly interested in. I did not always lay out 50 for the coffee meetings, but perhaps over 50% of the time I offered something. Call it an insurance policy if you will. When I f*cked up the most was when I geared the first meeting to be a dinner "date" and spent the most $. That strategy often attracted the sorts who were either too desperate financially to latch onto something, or just brought out the quasi-pros and the UTR girls (because they rather "work" during the day!) Happy Hour can also be a compromise for those who can not do mid morning coffee and do not have an SO to worry about happy hour meets.

Now, I had a unique and clever way of approaching potential prospects in the first email (this is very, very important, i.e, how you take the time to hone your pitch) which yielded me an otherwise improbably high success rate, if for instance I was on a traditional dating site such as Match or OK Cupid. You must become a lot more original in your 1st approach than just referring them to your profile. The potential SB profiles are a messy maze of fakes, fence-sitters, time-wasters, pros, semi-pros, charlatans, ROBs, etc... From my own personal experience, almost every single time when I was approached by a POT SB and I let things develop into a meeting and beyond, it happened to become a total waste of time proposition. Those are often the types who are in a grave financial situation and need to enter into an "arrangement" as soon as yesterday!

My best success rate was when I kept the first meeting brief, fun and void of discussing any particular arrangement. I always broached that subject during the 2nd meeting, if it ever got to that point. A POT SB may indeed want to know about your offer in the very first meeting, so be prepared to lay your offer on the table there and then if you are interested in that POT SB, but from experience again, those were the types who were already actively engaged in the sugar game with a few other SDs.

One difference in methodology between Z and I seems to be that I always chose the meeting venue, after I got a feel for her geographical proximity and how far she was willing to drive. It worked best for me because it put me in a position of authority right away. To let her choose the location based on her comfort level is fine, but just not for me. Call it a home court advantage if you will!

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