Sober provider here who would love to meet another sober friend!
It is scary to know that - that's the reality for most. I recently went to a M&G where almost every girl I talked to seemed completely intoxicated out of their minds. I'm sorry but I like feeling in the moment, being in control, and knowing whats going on too much to be drunk or drugged out of my mind. I do not have a stable "career" outside of this as I am one of those true college girls paying their way through school. However I could easily exit this industry. I was completely content working as a server before entering and don't see it as "either I do this or I can't survive" situation. I think some girls become accustomed to the luxurious lifestyle this can provide so they think they have to do this to maintain that. But if I was truly not happy, I would quickly go back to my burger and fries lifestyle. Those Louboutins are not worth emotional distress. This industry could really fuck with your mind if you are not stable and focused knowing 100% why you are in the game. Like you, I've met girls who say the same thing. I jokingly laughed at all their comments but later on realized how completely serious they are.I am still fairly new to sex itself so I enjoy meeting different men with different needs and desires. It's always so new and fun for me. It's also a adrenalin rush, meeting new men, (as much screening as you'd like) not really knowing what personality is going to walk through your door. You really do meet ALL KINDS of people. However I DO NOT see myself doing this for long. As soon as I am done with college I am done. I want a normal life, normal husband, normal dog and kids and I don't think I could have all of that being an escort forever. But that's just my opinion. So when you say you truly enjoy this hobby what exactly do you mean by that?
If you really enjoy sex you could find it in other realms. Why do you enjoy escorting?
Im truly interested in knowing your answer!
-- Modified on 4/11/2015 4:49:37 PM
Since becoming a provider and as I dive deeper and deeper into the world of p4p I've had the opportunity to meet many new and wonderful people and share some of my insanity with them. But I'm finding that as I meet other ladies in the business I'm seeing the side of the business I had hoped I would never come across. too often I hear from well reviewed reputable ladies that they can't work without their Xanax, wine, percs, coke, molly etc and they they're in abusive relationships, or that they can't leave the city they are touring in bc they haven't made enough cash to get home. When I hear these things from ladies it just breaks my heart and I feel the need to fix them but I realize that I can not fix anyone, or even help anyone who doesn't want help.
Are there other ladies like me who prefer to be sober during sessions? Ladies who choose this profession because they enjoy the job not bc they feel like they have no other choice? Anyone have a family, kids, and a stable lifestyle?
Don't get me wrong, i'm always happy to smoke a joint, or two... maybe five lol but i'm responsible enough to know when it's appropriate and when it is not.
Sooooo if you're a friendly, down to earth provider who has most of your shit together, passionate about your work and is interested in being friendly with another like minded provider, don't be shy... send me a PM and say HI!
are not as you described above, though I admit I've run across a few in my time who would fall into that category.
It's sad, but there are such people in all professions, even doctors and lawyers.
I've been lucky to meet some ladies who aren't involved in such situations but us girls don't get to meet each other too often.
Everyone has their personal crap, I'd be lying if I said I didn't. But some have more then others...
I really want to make friends, network, and have fun with females that have similar priorities and a similar lifestyle as I do. I have no shortage of male friends, but making friends with girls can be really tough
I have bailed a provider out of jail, because her family could not do anything.
The arrest was for prostitution, but what made it worst was that she ran and avoided court for a year.
I went to the jail facility but had handed the money to her sis who bail her out with the money I gave them. When she got out, I saw her as a regular (under the radar, because she didn't advertise anymore) until she was into a relationship. After a year, she's still out of jail, but in probation. I'm glad I've given her the freedom, but her life is not a happy one. She was in a relationship and today she wrote that the guy kicked her out.
Another regular provider from 3 years ago contacted me, because that time I also paid her bail. She was my regular for like 3-4 months. But she was a bad one - our last encounter was no good, because she took $$$ from me in the parking lot, said she'd get a room, and drove off without doing the service. She ended up in jail for 1.5 years from a past case involving drug possession and property fraud. She became a waitress after she got out. But $$ is difficult so she contacted me December 2014 and wanted to see me. I said 'ok', I forgive her, but said I'm not giving her $$ on the parking lot and I'll get the room.' Haven't her from her since. I'm ok, but I won't allow myself to be fooled twice. She told me how she tried to defraud Walmart by buying merchandise and refunding it with a cheaper merchandise. She didn't hang around with good people.
Lawyers have a high suicide and substance abuse rate - if not the highest among professions, it's up there. Dentists have a high suicide rate as well, and as I understand, doctors tend to have addiction issues.
I think it has to do with being involved in people's personal lives/issues, and being empathetic to them. It takes a toll.
I have also gotten to know a number of ladies and I am amazed at how broke so many are considering the large sums (per hour) that are paid.. I know there are expenses.. and so on.. but I am astounded at how destitute many are. The scary part is that some I have met seem to live on the edges of society.. no safety net.. no ability to get help if needed.. I live in New England.. if a provider is out of oil/gas and has no heat.. they feel that if they ask for public assistance.. too many questions will be asked.. One provider I knew broke a tooth.. OK.. but without any insurance it was a lot of money and choices to get it fixed. The drugs are another issue.. I guess I was naïve.. but drugs never fixed a problem.. They just make you forget about it for a little while. so the idea that if something goes sideways ... You want to get high.. is foreign to me.. Better to deal with it and move on.. and for some providers I have me,t their response to stress is to get high.
My "problem" is that if someone is in distress.. I can't walk away and just leave them in trouble.. I think one of the biggest (best?) lessons I have learned from being involved with P4P.. is that I can't save everyone that is worthy of saving.. wish I could.. but I can't.. so I have pretty much stopped seeing girls because it was tearing me apart.. wish I could ignore it..
Sad but true, very few out there as such myself and I love what I do would not change it ever, I meet so many wonderful people/friends! I love life and have goals and achieve many with new challenges every year to achieve
If an alcoholic BECAME a provider, it would, IMO, be difficult to stay sober. Actually, even social drinkers who are at risk of a problem would probably end up struggling a lot. Same with other addictions.
When they see a client, most providers only show their sexy selves. Clients can only guess at the gritty side, and we usually don't want to see it. Also, very few of us want to hear any sob stories and get hit up for bail, car payments, airline tickets, hospital stays, or whatever the latest tragedy that has befallen them.
At the same time, there's this chemistry-driven urge to get to know the lady better, the hope for an OTC cocktail, or the "real date" of taking her out without paying for her time. So I suspect that most providers are reluctant to disclose much about themselves, and that what we might learn is only the tip of a huge iceberg. Even though they might want to share a little something about who they are aside from the lady that sucks guys off for a living, there are probably a few lies woven in to whatever stories they tell.
To me it sounds like it would be a very lonely life to lead. Ironic only because they can relax and enjoy the sex when they like, and for male clients that SEEMS to be the antidote to all loneliness. But not being able to let many people know who they are sounds lonely in a way that could easily result in slipping into some bad situations.
I am happy with my life and not into the drug scene at all, except for cannabis oil but i'm a cancer survivor and I don't take it during appointments because i'll fall asleep
I provide on the side of my regular jobs I have. I shoot porn but I am also involved in the fitness wellness industry. I wish people were more accepting of the hobby but it's kind of fun having 2 different lives Everyday really is a blessing and should'nt be taken for granted, if something in your life is making you so unhappy you have to take drugs then that should be a very clear sign to change whatever that thing is that's causing you misery. Change is always possible.
Jasmeen Lefleur
some interesting people. You get the same stories with waitresses and bartenders (and maybe it's not just cash industries- as MrFisher said, doctors and lawyers find themselves in these situations too). Happily, I've been able to meet hundreds of people in this industry due to the paths I've taken in life, and my closest friends tend to be like me- stable, educated, and happy in this work. I've certainly also met my fair share of the stereotype, but more often than not, it really has little to do with this work- it seems to be more immaturity and unwise decision making that lead some down dark paths. The stigma and necessary mendacity that is required to be here can also cause heaps of issues, and only maturity and a modicum of self-actualization can ameliorate or prevent them.
Are there other ladies like me who prefer to be sober during sessions? Ladies who choose this profession because they enjoy the job not bc they feel like they have no other choice? Anyone have a family, kids, and a stable lifestyle?
Don't get me wrong, i'm always happy to smoke a joint, or two... maybe five lol but i'm responsible enough to know when it's appropriate and when it is not.
Sooooo if you're a friendly, down to earth provider who has most of your shit together, passionate about your work and is interested in being friendly with another like minded provider, don't be shy... send me a PM and say HI!
Do not do any drugs at all. Have a glass of wine maybe 2 times a month.
I just don't feel the need but I recognize that I was blessed to be born this way. I think some people are wired to need it to feel happy. I wish I could fix them, too.
I am very normal person outside of the hobby (well, kind of tame inside of it, too). I have a civvie job and a kid who means the world to me.
I like making people feel good and be happy. Also in real life, I am really shy around men and hardly ever date. So this is kind of my social life, at least in that dept.
Otherwise, I am a complete norm I have met some nice providers. A few I felt bad for, but most of them seemed to have their act together.
-- Modified on 4/11/2015 4:47:35 PM
Sober provider here who would love to meet another sober friend!
It is scary to know that - that's the reality for most. I recently went to a M&G where almost every girl I talked to seemed completely intoxicated out of their minds. I'm sorry but I like feeling in the moment, being in control, and knowing whats going on too much to be drunk or drugged out of my mind. I do not have a stable "career" outside of this as I am one of those true college girls paying their way through school. However I could easily exit this industry. I was completely content working as a server before entering and don't see it as "either I do this or I can't survive" situation. I think some girls become accustomed to the luxurious lifestyle this can provide so they think they have to do this to maintain that. But if I was truly not happy, I would quickly go back to my burger and fries lifestyle. Those Louboutins are not worth emotional distress. This industry could really fuck with your mind if you are not stable and focused knowing 100% why you are in the game. Like you, I've met girls who say the same thing. I jokingly laughed at all their comments but later on realized how completely serious they are.
I am still fairly new to sex itself so I enjoy meeting different men with different needs and desires. It's always so new and fun for me. It's also a adrenalin rush, meeting new men, (as much screening as you'd like) not really knowing what personality is going to walk through your door. You really do meet ALL KINDS of people. However I DO NOT see myself doing this for long. As soon as I am done with college I am done. I want a normal life, normal husband, normal dog and kids and I don't think I could have all of that being an escort forever. But that's just my opinion.
So when you say you truly enjoy this hobby what exactly do you mean by that?
If you really enjoy sex you could find it in other realms. Why do you enjoy escorting?
Im truly interested in knowing your answer!
-- Modified on 4/11/2015 4:49:37 PM