Florida

Honesty is always the best policy...
Sexy Toni See my TER Reviews 536 reads
posted

...as a provider, it is so important to be honest with your SO. A relationship that cannot be built on honesty and trust to me seems doomed from the beginning. If your SO truly loves you and the relationship is meant to be, it will be either through acceptance of your career choice or through determining an alternate path.  

When I first started as a personal assistant, I agreed to help ladies whose boyfriends/spouses did not know about their part time career. I will no longer do that as it creates a difficult situation.  It it imperative that they know for many reasons, safety being one of them. Also, if I were in that situation it would be awful to go through life day by day wondering if today was the day he could "find out". That is not a way to carry on, through deception. It is not healthy.  

A friend of mine recently told her mother! After years of familial discourse and in a heated argument, she blurted it out and even later sent the link to her ad (granted she is in her 40s and has long been from under her parents control). She actually feels a better and liberated. It is no longer a "dirty little secret" and she proud of her many successful accomplishments her career has afforded her the luxury to achieve.

Through life we meet people who will either like us or not. People like us for who we are not "what we do". If someone truly loves you, they will be understanding and able to work through whatever the situation is before us. And, as the Bible says: "judge not, least ye be judged!"

Okay kiddos, my .02 cents is over. Now let's all have some fun today ;

Would you lie or tell the truth if:

Your significant other found out what you've been doing?  

For providers, your immediate family found out what you do for a living

abcdguy1046 reads

I think I would lie, lie, lie.  After already being dishonest by participating in the hobby, not much to lose by lying to cover it up.

What if your significant other found evidence though, such as texts/email/etc.? If she were to perform a Google search, she might find that the email or phone number belonged to a provider. I've actually "covered" for a few friends in the past when they'd left their email open by accident. (We said he'd been arranging entertainment to surprise a coworker on a birthday.) However, if the significant other has the actual exchanges, then it becomes difficult to cover - we were very lucky to be able to cover in these particular situations. But if the SO has exchanges that read, "Thanks for the amazing time at the Hilton on Thursday," it's more difficult.

I believe I'd be done anyway so I'd probably lie.  She's gone or she's gone.

I have gone thru this before.. They were not shocked since they knew I had done internet porn before. They just said be safe and have fun. But they r from Germany where it is legal So I am sure that helped with them being understanding

Honestly it came out when I got the big D so anyone in my opinion has anything to say and I am going to be snarky for a moment you do not like it pay my bills for me and if you do not want to be associated with me because f my chosen profession F you!!!! I don't need you anyway.......Period......... What we do is a much needed service and it makes people happy end of story.
I have not participated for a while because I had to help a friend run his business Full time because of a medical emergency and that was for the past five months........This business Allowed me to go above and beyond and that friend knows what I do and has No problem with it... Just another example of how great the biz really is and the rewards also trickle down to our friends and Family. So I say this if people are going to be judgemental they lose. Best of luck my sister.

immediate family know what I do, except for my son and my father.  

I was posting this because quite honestly, if I see another REPETITIVE ISO I'm going to lose my mind lol.

Well, recently my significant other asked me if I'd be willing to retire. He said that while he knows what I do (we met via website/industry) it does bother him, and I agreed to stop. One of the reasons that I respectfully request that I'm not discussed online is because it could be potentially embarrassing. Those who know me well, know that I cannot ask or accept financial assistance - from anyone, including him. I know that sounds silly, but I just couldn't. But I still need to eat, and I am a single mother. So I decided to try to stay UTR (Under The Radar) and continue in this industry in order to survive...but remain UTR for his and my own discretion.  

Well..recently, someone outed me (purposely, as reprisal.) Not the mature thing, I agree. But they did - as a matter of fact, I woke up to a text message telling me to "why don't you read TER," so I did. Long story. I won't go into why they did this, but I'll say that it was a mean-spirited, boorish move. And when I'd seen what they'd done, of course, I was very upset.  

That explained, I went straight to my boyfriend first after seeing what I did. I explained to him that if he decided to logon to TER, he will see that I am still working.  

He listened, and to my surprise, he said (after reading, of course) "Don't worry. Nothing can tear us apart. No matter how they try. I don't care what they say. It's okay. Just distance yourself from them and be independent and focus on your regular job, you're excellent at helping people, it's what you love. It's okay."  

I honestly couldn't believe that he was so understanding. I was relieved. And tonight, he sent me a message to just check on me, and make sure that I was okay. He makes me feel very safe and cared for. :)

So far as my regular career: If anyone ever found out, I'd lose my business, professional license, and likely my entire life. This is why when my significant other said, "I agree this is a sign that you should get out of this business," I agreed with him.

In my professional career, I see much marital discord and stress. I advise that it's never a prudent decision to have some catharsis and tell your spouse of your hobby, as that will only cause unnecessary pain and trust issues. Should your spouse find out on their own, such as finding email correspondence, etc., it's safest to be honest, and admit that (one) indiscretion. However, I would not advise that one explain their propensity to patronize escorts if they're seasoned hobbyists. Admitting to one indiscretion is better than admitting a list of them. In other words, only give the information that's absolutely necessary. Believe it or not, I have actually "covered" for several friends, and it worked quite well. Also, this will possibly come as a surprise to some, but wives actually would prefer their spouse have an indiscretion with a one-time escort versus an actual affair, which would theoretically mean a connection was made with another woman. Interesting stuff, huh?

Just_thebadboy_n_me332 reads

Wow Tori if you are trying to be UTR why do you put up 3 post on BP at one time? And how do you know what a spouse would prefer? Have you taken a poll are did you just think that was a cool thing to say?

Posted By: ToriKTaylor
Well, recently my significant other asked me if I'd be willing to retire. He said that while he knows what I do (we met via website/industry) it does bother him, and I agreed to stop. One of the reasons that I respectfully request that I'm not discussed online is because it could be potentially embarrassing. Those who know me well, know that I cannot ask or accept financial assistance - from anyone, including him. I know that sounds silly, but I just couldn't. But I still need to eat, and I am a single mother. So I decided to try to stay UTR (Under The Radar) and continue in this industry in order to survive...but remain UTR for his and my own discretion.  
   
 Well..recently, someone outed me (purposely, as reprisal.) Not the mature thing, I agree. But they did - as a matter of fact, I woke up to a text message telling me to "why don't you read TER," so I did. Long story. I won't go into why they did this, but I'll say that it was a mean-spirited, boorish move. And when I'd seen what they'd done, of course, I was very upset.  
   
 That explained, I went straight to my boyfriend first after seeing what I did. I explained to him that if he decided to logon to TER, he will see that I am still working.  
   
 He listened, and to my surprise, he said (after reading, of course) "Don't worry. Nothing can tear us apart. No matter how they try. I don't care what they say. It's okay. Just distance yourself from them and be independent and focus on your regular job, you're excellent at helping people, it's what you love. It's okay."  
   
 I honestly couldn't believe that he was so understanding. I was relieved. And tonight, he sent me a message to just check on me, and make sure that I was okay. He makes me feel very safe and cared for. :)  
   
 So far as my regular career: If anyone ever found out, I'd lose my business, professional license, and likely my entire life. This is why when my significant other said, "I agree this is a sign that you should get out of this business," I agreed with him.  
   
 In my professional career, I see much marital discord and stress. I advise that it's never a prudent decision to have some catharsis and tell your spouse of your hobby, as that will only cause unnecessary pain and trust issues. Should your spouse find out on their own, such as finding email correspondence, etc., it's safest to be honest, and admit that (one) indiscretion. However, I would not advise that one explain their propensity to patronize escorts if they're seasoned hobbyists. Admitting to one indiscretion is better than admitting a list of them. In other words, only give the information that's absolutely necessary. Believe it or not, I have actually "covered" for several friends, and it worked quite well. Also, this will possibly come as a surprise to some, but wives actually would prefer their spouse have an indiscretion with a one-time escort versus an actual affair, which would theoretically mean a connection was made with another woman. Interesting stuff, huh?

...as a provider, it is so important to be honest with your SO. A relationship that cannot be built on honesty and trust to me seems doomed from the beginning. If your SO truly loves you and the relationship is meant to be, it will be either through acceptance of your career choice or through determining an alternate path.  

When I first started as a personal assistant, I agreed to help ladies whose boyfriends/spouses did not know about their part time career. I will no longer do that as it creates a difficult situation.  It it imperative that they know for many reasons, safety being one of them. Also, if I were in that situation it would be awful to go through life day by day wondering if today was the day he could "find out". That is not a way to carry on, through deception. It is not healthy.  

A friend of mine recently told her mother! After years of familial discourse and in a heated argument, she blurted it out and even later sent the link to her ad (granted she is in her 40s and has long been from under her parents control). She actually feels a better and liberated. It is no longer a "dirty little secret" and she proud of her many successful accomplishments her career has afforded her the luxury to achieve.

Through life we meet people who will either like us or not. People like us for who we are not "what we do". If someone truly loves you, they will be understanding and able to work through whatever the situation is before us. And, as the Bible says: "judge not, least ye be judged!"

Okay kiddos, my .02 cents is over. Now let's all have some fun today ;

Looks like the providers r honest about this vs most clients would deny or lie

Gebas547 reads

go figure, most of us have good life, nagging wife, few kids, good job, nice house, expensive car + some extra ladies. Now try imagining what would happen if the nagging wife will find out, divorce, chile support, losing the house and everything you have.  
thanks no, LIE like hell, and make her think that she is paranoid.

IsorokuYamamoto311 reads

So they say lol so they say

Posted By: annie1117
Looks like the providers r honest about this vs most clients would deny or lie

Tell her you were doing research for a threesome.  Also offer a free pass for her to get some strange.

Posted By: hartpulse
Tell her you were doing research for a threesome.  Also offer a free pass for her to get some strange.
 
If my wife was that kinky....I would probably not be on this site. LOL

Great_Hobby348 reads

That is the best answer I have seen and will try it if ever caught.

Posted By: hartpulse
Tell her you were doing research for a threesome.  Also offer a free pass for her to get some strange.

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