To answer your first question: I recommend checking out TLC's website. I took a look at the list of stars appearing at Exxxotica and noticed about a dozen that are listed on TLC's site. Among those I remember who are listed publicly: Christie Stevens, Aleksa Nicole and Jynx Maze. So CALL Adonia.
As for where to stay: your best bet is to stay in the "official" hotel. You never know what's going to happen. At Exxotica's in NJ, I've made arrangements at the show and then just had them come to the room (or I went to theirs). The less travel time involved, the more likely she can work it into her schedule.