My response or non-response all depends on my mood and who I'm with. Sometimes I'll keep my mouth shut. Other times I'll quietly state that we all pay for it one way or another.
when you are with your guy friends and you start talking about girls and sex and the topic of escorts and what not comes up and your friends say they would never for pay for it.
Do you keep quite or do you speak your mind?
nice try copper top
Well Guz, that all depends. If you're a single guy w/o an SO then say your peace. However, being a married guy who has other married friends whose wives know my wife AND knowing that some of the guys tell their wives everything, I would probably keep quiet.
One set is from TER, so it's not an issue. Not if, but who I've seen. The other set (for the most part) knows that I've been around that element from my adult-related business. They also KNOW that I'd never go there. I hate to burst a bubble.
She's right...and add this: everyone knoes at least one person they'll tell everything to. So you're not just telling your buddies.
There are few things as rewarding as having one or more formerly macho-postured legend in their own mind wannabe alfa male Neanderthals slack-jawed at the availability, frequency and quality of sex/sex partner found by just owning up to the fact you're gonna pay for it no matter what so you might as well cut out the bullshit and pay for the sex and not so much the date.
My response or non-response all depends on my mood and who I'm with. Sometimes I'll keep my mouth shut. Other times I'll quietly state that we all pay for it one way or another.
...I just smile smugly to myself, knowing full well that the next time I'm wrapped in the warm embrace of a beautiful provider he'll probably at home trying to talk his hand into have sex with him.
-- Modified on 1/31/2006 11:34:00 PM
You should be able to express yourself freely and not feel uncomfortable.
and the male ego could make it difficult to talk about paying for it.
Don't be lulled into thinking that everyone else is cool with our little hobby. If you spend enough time at TER you start to forget how judgmental most other people are about this activity. And in truth our little mutually fulfilling arrangement with providers is probably the exception world wide. The stories of sexual exploitation are what most people associate with this world.
If you want to talk about the hobby then stick to discussing it with your TER brothers and sisters.
You also don't want one of your "buddies" to remember your admission and perhaps bring it up at a later time when it would be inconvenient for you. Sure, he's your friend *now*... but will that ever change? Or perhaps he'll just say something indiscreet that might get back to someone else.
Best to just shut the hell up. As my father used to tell me, "A fish won't get in trouble if he keeps his mouth shut."
They were, at one time, thinking about it or have done so.
When it comes up, just say
"sometime I rather pay them to leave, than to pay for them to live with me forever. Wives/girlfriends are more expensive !
I pretty much keep quite. A passionate reply would only draw unnecessary attention
...for it!"
Anneke's response: "Sonny, you just THINK you haven't."
So he can sit there with a stupid look and blow himself in ! LOL!
God, he'd look like my ex.. id have to slap him 
-- Modified on 2/1/2006 1:12:08 PM
...they no longer ever say they would never pay for it. I recall when I was much younger and newly married when a friend of mine would overtly hint at the hobby...only years later did I understand. Bottom line, 'never having to pay for it' disappears like pimples.
and I have told others that I have been with a pornstar - (true - but through this hobby) - I have tried to set up a civie date between a friend and a provider (true - he screwed up big time! and no he did not know her situation) and finally I have told select civies that I have been with an escort - I get a range of questions and they go like this:
1) gee, so do you actually "do it?" or do they only do it with certain guys...?
2) can I come with you (this was from a bi female friend).
3) sure - sure.... I am sure that you do (snicker)
4) why would you do that?
so the range of comments varies but I am very careful about who I tell this to....
When guys start saying stuff like - I would never pay for it, or escorts should be run outta town or other such stuff - I try not to say anything - it is not that I am ashamed - it is I do not feel like getting into what will potentially be a long and confused argument....
but my fav - was actually from a provider - you saw her - is she as awesome as I imagine!?
...who tells his wife, Judy, "Hey, guess what I heard today?" Then Judy tells HER best pal ...
...your wife.
when I first got divorced I started seeing a provider who I fell steeply for - she was great - really good sense of who she is... anyway, my ex was getting married - and as the provider lived close to the town that we live in - she offered to go to the wedding with me! needless to say, I was not going... but still I wonder should I have taken her up on the offer - could have really brought the house down! oh well, chaulk another one up to what could have been.
-- Modified on 2/1/2006 6:09:09 PM
I pay for her to shut up and go away