I often struggle with the same dilemma. Should I see my ATF yet again this month and go for the sure experience that is ooh so gooood but worry if I see her too often she might get complacent with me and start taking me for granted (as I've felt at times) or should I venture out and take my chances or maybe discover a new ATF? It's a hard decision. In my case the finance is a lesser issue; as a matter of fact, I could see her twice a month and be okay financially. Question is do I wanna see her exclusively and taste the bitterness of being taken for granted and then the experience wouldn't be so great if I do so?
Some random observations for those who are interested enough to read onward. I'm curious if my experience with the hobby, and the random musings it sometimes generates, are similar to yours...
- I couldn't save money worth a damn in my young adult life. I ran up a ton of credit card debt and still spent money like I had lots of it - often impulsively. Now, when I make an entertainment-related purchase, I pause to determine the long-term value of the item to me as compared to saving the money for a couple of hours with my ATF. Sometimes I buy the item, but sometimes the experience with my ATF, though shorter, is more valuable from a life experience perspective. Not the type of hobbyist with disposable income, I have a separate bank account where I actually *save* money for sessions.
- I never look at an apartment complex quite the same way anymore. Sometimes I wonder if providers had incall locations in the apartment complexes where I used to live. And sometimes I wonder if my visits with providers will take me there one day and I'll find out what was going on practically next door to me.
- I read reviews for providers in my local area and note that some of them date back to 2002. That always gets me thinking that it's amazing how oblivious I was to the existence of this community before deciding to venture in. Of course, I knew there were escorts and agencies. But an entire subculture? A hobbying community? Never entered my mind.
- Sometimes as I'm walking in the city, I look at the people walking by and wonder how many of them know that we, as a community, exist. Walking to and from work, I wonder how many people I pass that are part of this community. Maybe even some I might have had conversations with in the TER forums - or perhaps a lady that I might see in the future.
- I'm relatively surprised that you can live in the same general area as someone you sort of know and still never see them. I live not far from a couple of providers I've seen for sessions several times and statistics suggest that I would walk by them at some point in the 'real' world. But in two years, I've never seen them outside of our dates.
- Because of an occasional personal situation, I sometimes need difficult-to-trace funds for the hobby. During those times, I find myself paying for lunch when my co-workers and I go out. That way, I can pay the whole bill with my card and they pay me for their share with cash. Sometimes they think that I don't carry cash on principle. I can't really explain to them that I'm essentially laundering my own money.
- I've discovered people on eBay will buy most anything. During leaner times, I have sold duplicates from several collections of mine for funding the hobby experience.
- I've had to be honest with myself about those friends who are closest to me. A very few know about my experiences in the hobby - and, it turns out, those are the ones I trusted the most even before I started.
- Astonishingly, I know more acronyms and abbreviations now than I did when I worked for the Government.
- Though the anxiety of meeting someone altogether new and finding chemistry with them is no longer as strong as it was my first time, there's a pleasant nervousness that surrounds the entire appointment - from making the first call, to seeing who is behind the door. Mostly, my experiences have been good. And it's nice to feel that anticipation. It feels *alive*.
- Even though the hobby experience is my way of doing something good for myself, I've been pleased to find that at least part of me is like I thought it was. I still care about making the experience great for the lady I'm seeing - and I never mind spending part of the session focused on her desires and pleasure.
- It's interesting (to me) that difficult decisions come up in this hobby all the time. Do I take my money and have two great sessions with two different providers? Or do I go see my ATF for multiple hours of fun? Or do I take a chance on someone new? Or do I finally have the 2-girl experience I've yet to experience in my two years in this hobby? What a great problem to have.
Well, those are my random musings. This is a great hobby and has given me some of the greatest life experience I've had. Continued thanks to all of you who make TER the great resource it is. This wouldn't be as fun without you. - T
That's a bowl of words. Shorter version: Fuck & fuck again. Do my neighbors fuck? I ponder. TER kicks ass.
I agree. Get laid & be happy!
Never been impulsive with cash, well except the time I ALMOST bought a Porsche. That could've been bad.
Never sold things on Ebay for hobbying money, but have used Ebay money for hobbying. Just worked out that way.
Never worked for the government. Other than those, I'm right with you...looks like somebody is getting a jump on year end reflections.
Except hawking (sp?) things on ebay for the hobby and laundering my own money, that is a funny concept. All that work saving money and planning your next adventure must really add to the build up. I really share the same feelings about the difficulty in making the decision on who to see next. Do I stay on the reservation and see someone I know will give me a great date or do I give into curiosity and take a chance? I think I'll keep with the sure thing. Oh the decisions we're faced with....
NSF
I often struggle with the same dilemma. Should I see my ATF yet again this month and go for the sure experience that is ooh so gooood but worry if I see her too often she might get complacent with me and start taking me for granted (as I've felt at times) or should I venture out and take my chances or maybe discover a new ATF? It's a hard decision. In my case the finance is a lesser issue; as a matter of fact, I could see her twice a month and be okay financially. Question is do I wanna see her exclusively and taste the bitterness of being taken for granted and then the experience wouldn't be so great if I do so?
Trevillion is, of course, a romantic. I have most certainly felt--and feel--much like he does. There is something else, though. Hobbying is a great anti-oxidant and a major, if unheralded anti-aging strategy. It is also an effective cardio-vascular booster. I betcha that, like mine, Trevillion's heart skips a beat when that door opens, a beautiful smile greets you, and you know that in a few minutes you are going to be into her. And, when and if you really connect, as it happens from time to time,it can be, in its own way, as sublime an experience as they come. Just keep it safe.