Newbie - FAQ

Re: My reasons for requiring real full names....
TheApe 350 reads
posted

You make sense.  It is up to the client to decide if it is worth the risk.  When I started out in the game, I had no problem giving out my real name but as I advanced professionally, I felt it was too risky.  One thing about giving out the real name is that the provider usually feels more comfortable and the experience is better in many ways.  The drawback is that there is always a risk that someone decides to act silly and try to ruin your life for you.

gotducks1377 reads

I don't understand some providers asking for full names for first time clients. I understand they want to be safe etc. But are they willing to give you their full names as well? I feel that trust should go both ways... In any case, providers that generally ask for full names are no go on my book.  

Thoughts?

Second question, no they're not going to give you their real names.  If you aren't willing to give up your name, move on.  Each provider has her own method of screening.

Yeah, I kinda agree trust should go both ways, but it is what it is.  Personally, in all my hobbying, I have never had anyone ask for my real name.

LLAP,
Swim

ThePeopleRule634 reads

and I have never been asked.  If you are close enough to cross south of the border, the only ID the senoritas want to see are greenbacks.

Keep looking

Their lives are on the line, not yours, in all likelihood.

If that's what they need to feel safe, I won't argue with them. Sometimes I may offer up more info in the form of an added reference or two, but I don't ever badger or pressure them about it.

Some have been stalked, threatened or worse and the ones that haven't have all heard the legit stories of the ones that have.

Let's give the gals a pass on this one. Find a girl without that requirement and that is the overwhelming majority of them so, it shouldn't pose a problem

from a verification service (D-C, P411, or RS2K, employment information, or provider references.

If you don't want to give a lady what she asks for, then move on to someone else. A lady has every right to feel safe when meeting a guy.

I want to make sure you aren't on a registered sex offender list.   Yes, believe it or not, such people have indeed given their names out to providers, never thinking the lady would actually check.  LOL.

Also, that you don't have a history of domestic violence.

The most important reason is one I hope not to need: that I get hurt.   If I have my attacker's real personal info, I have more options for recourse than if I do not.  ;-)

As to this not being fair since we're not giving up our real name?  Puh-leeeze! LOL.  :-)

YOU get to read our reviews & see photos of us prior to meeting to give you a sense of "trust" and what to expect from us; we obviously don't get the same for you so each lady has to decide what she needs from her callers in order to entrust her safety to them.  

Please remember ......... nobody said this equation was fair on either side of the hotel-room-door. ;-)
We all have to decide what we need from the other in order to feel comfortable, and pass on those who don't fit with that.  

I absolutely respect clients' desire for anonymity and will never attempt to push or cajole anyone into sharing more information than he is comfortable giving.   I'll also explain the reasons for my requirement to all who ask.... I just won't compromise, make exceptions, or debate the matter.  :-)

I do think we are confusing the words "fair" with "equal." Both sides almost never give each other the same amount or type of info but just bc that is the case, doesn't mean it isn't "fair."

When we see our doctor, he knows our full name, address, SS #, medical history, etc so no, that isn't "equal" but of course it is "fair" per any reasonable person's view.

And not only does having his real, full info help you after the attack, as you say bc of recourse, I think it also comes into play as a preventative measure, giving a guy pause before he does anything violent.

It used to be fairly common in this biz for the gal to either call someone when the gent came in or to stage a call to someone, giving at least the impression that a third party knew a dude was with you and the dude knew some unknown person knew his exact whereabouts and at what time of day and what girl he was with. That would give pause to many to not to start any shit with the gal.

None of this guarantees anything, but risk mitigation is always key, imo.

GaGambler568 reads

To a degree you are "debating" the issue right now. lol

As you know, I personally have no issue giving out my real name, but my info is already splashed all over the internet, and guess how my info got splashed all over the internet in the first place? Somebody put it there with the intent to do me harm and they did it for petty, spiteful reasons, just like a BSC hooker might do over a 7-7 review which although that's not what happened to me, it HAS happened to others, and there are countless cases of BSC hookers blackmailing guys to take less than flattering reviews down by threatening to "out" them.

If I had anything to lose by revealing my real name to an unknown hooker who might or might not "go off the reservation" someday, you can bet your last dollar John Smith, err John Chang would be the closest thing to a "real" name she would be getting from me.

via email, PM, text, etc.  as some are wont to lecture me about it lol.    

I just stop responding. ;-)

TheApe351 reads

You make sense.  It is up to the client to decide if it is worth the risk.  When I started out in the game, I had no problem giving out my real name but as I advanced professionally, I felt it was too risky.  One thing about giving out the real name is that the provider usually feels more comfortable and the experience is better in many ways.  The drawback is that there is always a risk that someone decides to act silly and try to ruin your life for you.

...if you have the proper creds for screening chances are she won't even ask.

Zangari497 reads

Posted By: gotducks
I don't understand some providers asking for full names for first time clients…providers that generally ask for full names are no go on my book.  
 Ducks: well done.  Any provider who asks for your real name should be dropped immediately.  
Posted By: Debra_Hollander
I want to make sure you aren't on a registered sex offender list…that you don't have a history of domestic violence…
 

 You do understand that this is why a screening service is used.  Gina of P411 had my personal info & did a background check on me when I joined her site.  I trust her.  I don't trust anonymous providers like you.   A girl I'm seeing on a regular basis (long-term ATF/SB) will know my name, and I'll know hers.  That's not you.  

Posted By: Debra_Hollander
 I just won't compromise, make exceptions, or debate the matter.  
 You have every right to make the statement above.  My advice for any guy on the board: don't waste your time contacting this provider.  --z

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