Newbie - FAQ

Don't leave her hanging or burn your bridges
impposter 49 Reviews 339 reads
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Posted By: cdubs
I'm relatively new. If I'm emailing providers I never talk about anything explicit. As I was finalizing with a provider she asked me how big my Johnson was. How long and how wide and gave me a scale. I stopped my interaction after that. Is that a standard thing or normal? Is it unsafe to discuss that over email? One side I can understand if a provider might be petite and can't handle something huge, but it's pretty explicit to start talking about that over email.
If everything else about her checks out (sooner or even later), you don't want her to think of you as a time-waster or a flake. You might at least end things with a polite email or something like that: "I'm sorry. Something came up and I have to postpone anything further until I get some other issues resolved. Perhaps we'll connect in the future."  

Just sayin' ..

I'm relatively new. If I'm emailing providers I never talk about anything explicit. As I was finalizing with a provider she asked me how big my Johnson was. How long and how wide and gave me a scale. I stopped my interaction after that. Is that a standard thing or normal? Is it unsafe to discuss that over email? One side I can understand if a provider might be petite and can't handle something huge, but it's pretty explicit to start talking about that over email.

I think the explicit stuff refers to the forthcoming activities that you are bargaining for.

I think discussing the size of your body parts is not the sort of explicit dialog they mean to avoid.  If you talk about what you intend to do to her with that body part on your meeting tomorrow afternoon for a donation of $300, then yeah, I'd avoid that

...screened you and you passed her screening? If so she may be a provider that is OK discussing specifics once a potential client has passed screening. I usually have those kinds of discussions by TER PM but I'll use e-mail from time to time.  

It's better from your side to never initiate a conversation regarding any specifics such as she mentioned even if you have passed screening because you don't know if she is OK with it or not. Many providers are not OK with it and will cut off contact at any point. Some are OK with it.  

If you had passed screening then it's not a big deal that she brought it up.  

If you had not passed screening it's iffy whether it was OK or not. If you did your research and you're confident she is legitimate (ie. has many  good reviews many of which are by established reviewers, isn't using stolen/fake photos on her site or in an ad,doesn't have various phone numbers connected to various sites, ads or agencies) it isn't likely she is LE and she probably isn't a bait & switch or a rob threat.

No it isn't a standard thing. There are many accepted ways of doing things but there really is no standard in this business.  

If you're not comfortable with that level of explicitness then you shouldn't do it and stopping communication was a good thing. You have to do what you're comfortable with.

I know I didn't give you a definitive answer but in this endeavor there are few definitive answers.  

Are you using e-mail that can't be traced to you? Are you especially careful about not leaving things out for otheres to see? Discussions like this on your company e-mail or your regular e-mail are not a good idea. Beleive it or not some people actually do that.

Be sure you've done everything you can to protect yourself. Then if you're sure she is legit there shouldn't be a problem with her question. Remember don't do anything you're not comfortable with regardless of how legit you believe she is.

Context:

You brought up a couple of good points.

1. Yes I do not use an email that can be traced back to me. (Thanks)
2. She never confirmed if we were screened or not. We had agreed to meet for an hour but did not finalize the day that we were meeting.
3. About the PM thing, I am active, but not always active so I couldn't PM her from TER when I was emailing her, but I do my homework with providers to make sure I'm not stepping into anything remotely iffy. (found her on TER, very new but other sites do seem to have her established)

Nothing is really "normal" or standard is this world. Every indie escort runs their business the way they want to. I see looking at your reviews, you're in LA, so you certainly have an abundance of escorts to choose from.

Posted By: cdubs
I'm relatively new. If I'm emailing providers I never talk about anything explicit. As I was finalizing with a provider she asked me how big my Johnson was. How long and how wide and gave me a scale. I stopped my interaction after that. Is that a standard thing or normal? Is it unsafe to discuss that over email? One side I can understand if a provider might be petite and can't handle something huge, but it's pretty explicit to start talking about that over email.
If everything else about her checks out (sooner or even later), you don't want her to think of you as a time-waster or a flake. You might at least end things with a polite email or something like that: "I'm sorry. Something came up and I have to postpone anything further until I get some other issues resolved. Perhaps we'll connect in the future."  

Just sayin' ..

Thanks for the feedback. Yea I did tell close out our convo after that

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