You make me sound like I'm judgemental. Im not. I don't care how many men a girl sleeps with. I think i was turned off by the possible proximity in which said men might have been with them
Bottom line: if engaging in this stuff repulses you, it's not your arena. Whether those particular ladies were "just wanting it to be over" or not, I can't say for sure. At the risk of sounding harsh, though, I can promise you that none of us like the idea of entertaining someone who is repulsed by us, our sexuality, or our sexual history.
My initial post was written 30 minutes after my last date, so i was pretty upset, frustrated etc. I've since had time to calm down.
I'm going to stop at the two dates I've had, then come back in a few months and try once or twice more.
After thinking things over a bit, I've discovered what part of my nervousness may have been coming from. I think its the uh...umm...how do i say this?
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing.
So I was on here earlier, crying about how no providers would get back to me.
Some excellent advice from members here and I changed my approach and met with success.
This morning I was a newbie with zero dates under my belt. Now I'm a frustrated newbie with two encounters, hundreds of dollars lighter, and some absurdly blue balls...
I had two separate dates, and both went down the same way. I simply could not - if my very life depended on it, get and stay hard. Zero releases. A total of 2 hours ripping condoms off my dead head.
I don't get it. Do you guys just chug Viagra beforehand?
I'm in my 30's, never had a whisper of any ED in my life, no weird body image issues, doubts about my "size" etc... Both of the ladies were well reviewed, attractive, kind, understanding. I wasn't worried about LE, never even crossed my mind. I just couldn't get hard for more than a minute.
Ask any of my exgf's and every one will tell you I am annoyingly horny, ready to "go" at an instant, with a stupid amount of stamina.
I just couldn't overcome my nervousness. Maybe this hobby, which I thought would be the best thing next to pepperoni pizza, is just not for me?
Kind of messes with your head. Now I'm going to be thinking of nothing else the next time. With any girl
In my experience, many 1st-timers tend to fall into one of two categories: 15 wonderful seconds of bliss, or Mr. Shy Dick that doesn't want to wake up and play. 
I'd recommend taking some time, thinking about what you're really after in this activity, and then if you still think this is for you: try again. But book more than one hour, so that you'll have plenty of time to relax and get comfortable with the lady, and NOT feel any internal pressure to perform.
Hope that helps! 
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Well said so true!
I don't know.
When i lived in N.Y my buddies and i hit the bar scene frequently.
I have had a decent amount of "traditional " one nighters.
But usually by the time i took a girl back to my place, it'd be a couple of hours since we'd met. Obviously liquor was involved. It was fun and exciting.
Meeting a stranger and having to perform instantly is...well, not as stimulating as i thought it'd be.
booze.
When I started out, I would also have anxieties. I found that a shot or two of whiskey about 30 minutes prior to meeting my date would sooth my mind and things flowed nicely.
Try it. What have you got to lose
They were ok. Not drop dead gorgeous.
You've asked this twice now.
I've answered in a post further down.
Performance Anxiety can occur in a lot of situations for a lot of different reasons and have results such as you described.
But the fact you're doing so well in civvie life makes me jealous! And it makes me wonder why you are here at all.
There are stories about guys trying to get into porn. In real life, they can stay hard as a rock forever and squirt huge loads on command. Put them in front of a camera (and all the people behind the camera), turn on the bright lights and they go limp, career ended before it begins.
Another example is going to take a leak in a public men's room. Take aim at the back of the urinal and all is well until somebody steps up to the plate right next to you and the flow goes to zero. My conscious brain tells me that I don't care about that guy standing next to me but I just can't get the engine started, no matter what. So I zip up and try again later.
Lastly, some gentlemen here, older and wiser gentlemen perhaps, will admit that sometimes it isn't about being a porn star in the room. It's about the totality of the experience being with an attractive, personable no-strings attached hostess for an hour or two. If the hoped for XXX experience turns out to be a PG-13 product it can still be from a pleasurable encounter.
You're a young guy with civvie options. As long as that holds up, stick with it and come back when you're 50!
-- Modified on 10/17/2015 8:29:39 PM
I honestly can't speak for anyone here but myself.
But no one really spends hundreds of dollars for "company"
Look at all the reviews. I've read many. Its all rather explicit.
Get laid. Have sex with someone who's not your wife, or GF.
As to me being here... i don't know. I've done fine in what you call the civvie world, but I've always been massively attracted to the Hobby.
What it represents. The purity of the transaction.
I always thought it would be a thrill to meet a girl and be undressed and going at it moments later. Guess i was wrong.
But no one really spends hundreds of dollars for "company"
Look at all the reviews. I've read many. Its all rather explicit.
Get laid. Have sex with someone who's not your wife, or GF.
What it represents. The purity of the transaction.
I always thought it would be a thrill to meet a girl and be undressed and going at it moments later. Guess i was wrong.
Good luck to you
You seem like a very reasonable man. And your advice is thoughtful.
But to me, both encounters were failures on my part... i won't be ok just walking away from this. Haha, like you said, im young.
Think my next step is to go to my doctor and get a script for some Ciallis.
Then try again. Maybe knowing I'm riddled with PDE5 Inhibitors will give me the confidence i need to get through my first few dates.
I really really need to prove to myself i can do this.
But no one really spends hundreds of dollars for "company"
Look at all the reviews. I've read many. Its all rather explicit.
Get laid. Have sex with someone who's not your wife, or GF.
Those are the submitted reviews of sessions self-selected for their board appeal and juiciness, 1.23 million at last count. There are millions more that are never written up. I am pretty sure that there are plenty of happy times, the pleasure of someone's company, without the wall-to-wall XXX-ing around.
What it represents. The purity of the transaction.
I always thought it would be a thrill to meet a girl and be undressed and going at it moments later. Guess i was wrong.
Yep. You tried it. Not what you thought it would be. You're young and healthy - that is, the problem sounds like PA and not some kind of major health issue. As you are well aware, you can try again any time you want: in a month, a year, a decade ... some things might change but the The World's Oldest Profession isn't going to disappear any time soon.
Good luck to you!
There are lots of examples of younger guys like you or me (I'm just over 40), who don't have ED issues, take Viagra or Cialis, then get hard but can't actually get off. One alternative that works well for me is a medium distance hard run the morning before. My best performance is within 12 hours of a good workout.
But back to the anxiety part, I'd recommend looking for a lady who spends some time talking/getting to know you. My regular friend advertises that way. She's a meet you, get to know you first sort. That works well for me. We'll talk for maybe 30-60 minutes, then things just naturally progress. Of course we know each other very well now. Maybe one of the two you already met do that. Then you'd see someone familiar, talk a while and see how it progresses.
I'd also suggest trying to disconnect your mind from the money. The way you described it reminds me of taking the kids to Disney, "I'm spending so much damned money on this, you kids are going to have fun dammit!" Then there's no fun and lots of temper tantrums. If you are thinking during the appointment, "Wow I spent $$$ on this and it NEEDS to be mind blowing", then you are behind the 8-ball mentally so to speak.
But a lot of us are here because we have no other choice; many many many are in sexless marriages for one reason or another (as I am), so advice from married guys who don't get any at home may or may not be as applicable to you. Always good to know the circumstances of those offering free advice on a web forum so you can considers its applicability (or lack thereof). A lot of us suffered the opposite the first visit. "Oh my God it's been 5 years since I last had sex and I'm in bed with a gorgeous naked woman....pop....oh shit, we didn't even start yet.
Thanks for taking the time to post your viewpoint!
My initial post was written 30 minutes after my last date, so i was pretty upset, frustrated etc. I've since had time to calm down.
I'm going to stop at the two dates I've had, then come back in a few months and try once or twice more.
After thinking things over a bit, I've discovered what part of my nervousness may have been coming from. I think its the uh...umm...how do i say this?
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing.
You sound like a chronic over-thinker analyzer type (I'm one too!) so that might not be easy or even possible.
Unless, of course, you pick a very low-volume (maybe once or twice a week) courtesan-type.
They're out there, they're usually incredibly gorgeous, easy to talk to, and quite expensive too.
Whatever you decide, good luck!!!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Haha. Yeah. I over think everything. To a fault. It's baked into my DNA.
It's not even that. I can talk to anyone and be joking and comfortable within minutes.
Hell, my job is to meet strangers, make them comfortable, and them sell them product that is thousands of dollars
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
However, maybe a readjustment of your thinking, if that is possible for you, could make it fun. While it's true that some ladies who do this don't really enjoy it very much, there are plenty who actually like sex. I know, shocking, right? Instead of thinking of how many she's been with, you can think of how much she loves the sexual experience. While our society has taught us that females who love sex and have many partners are gross, another way to look at it is that women who do this are much more open and have - at least privately - thumbed their noses at the social norms. Having sex with a lot of people doesn't have to be repulsive; it can be liberating.
If you can't mentally think of this in a positive way, I think you're better off in the regular world, especially since you are fairly successful in that venue anyway.
If you care about how many dicks have been on/in her, that's a huge problem. You're not going to find a girl in this profession who has held onto the kind of "purity" you want (and even if you could, there's really no way to know for sure). Just for the record, though: I guarantee some of the one night stands you've had were with chicks who've had WAY more dick than a lot of providers.
Bottom line: if engaging in this stuff repulses you, it's not your arena. Whether those particular ladies were "just wanting it to be over" or not, I can't say for sure. At the risk of sounding harsh, though, I can promise you that none of us like the idea of entertaining someone who is repulsed by us, our sexuality, or our sexual history.
My initial post was written 30 minutes after my last date, so i was pretty upset, frustrated etc. I've since had time to calm down.
I'm going to stop at the two dates I've had, then come back in a few months and try once or twice more.
After thinking things over a bit, I've discovered what part of my nervousness may have been coming from. I think its the uh...umm...how do i say this?
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing.
You make me sound like I'm judgemental. Im not. I don't care how many men a girl sleeps with. I think i was turned off by the possible proximity in which said men might have been with them
Bottom line: if engaging in this stuff repulses you, it's not your arena. Whether those particular ladies were "just wanting it to be over" or not, I can't say for sure. At the risk of sounding harsh, though, I can promise you that none of us like the idea of entertaining someone who is repulsed by us, our sexuality, or our sexual history.
My initial post was written 30 minutes after my last date, so i was pretty upset, frustrated etc. I've since had time to calm down.
I'm going to stop at the two dates I've had, then come back in a few months and try once or twice more.
After thinking things over a bit, I've discovered what part of my nervousness may have been coming from. I think its the uh...umm...how do i say this?
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing.
Your "yuck" factor was due to "dirty wh*re" stigma.
Guess what - we do wash, and the vagina itself is a self-cleaning organ. You have no idea how recently the dicks may or may not have been, (maybe you were the first one all week!), and it's most likely those cocks were sheathed in latex.
I was thinking you might want to go back to the bars and try again, since you seem not to have that issue in casual hook ups. But ah... I'll just suggest the ladies here tend to be much more careful and aware of their health and hygiene than the general public. Not only is it our livelihood, we're subject to very public ratings and ridicule if not up to snuff.
Yikes!
So harsh! Fyi, first lady has a straight up rotten smelling vagina.
Second was better, but not freshly showered, more like showered sometime that day. I wasn't making things up, i got paranoid cause these two weren't fresh.
sees you in a less than stellar light.
Unless you track down a virgin, most women have had a guy in her at some point. And what about you...you might not be the purest thing either...how many mouths and vaginas have you dipped it into? Kind of pot calling the kettle black. You might need to leave this alone if you feel that disgusted by the ladies.
-- Modified on 10/20/2015 11:52:07 AM
You have me mistaken.
I should have just told everything at once, instead of doling out in bite sized pieces.
I dont care how many dicks have been in a girl.
I was in love with this chick who had been with...well, an astonishing amount of dudes. I didn't care. She was mine, thats all that mattered.
I just wouldn't want to be kissing a lady who may have been sucking someone else's dick an hour ago...thats really so weird?
You guys are all super cool with that?
Picture this. This girl will allow CIM. She just did. You see her an hour later, maybe she brushed, mouthwash...maybe she said "fuck it" and didnt.
And now you're tge "lucky" dude kissing her mouth next.
That's..fine? You are A-ok with that?
If you don't like it then I respectfully suggest you don't partake. And do the hookers a favor, you are making hookers out to be filthy and that is not getting you much sympathy from most of us. How do hookers know you are clean? That you did not just stick your dick up some chicks ass and not wash it.? For as many gross things you say about hookers, hookers have a matching response about tricks.
Ok. I understand you. But in these particular cases. They were not clean.
Straight up. I didn't say all of them. Just the very first two i was with.
I know rotten vag. Unfortunately .
or familiarity with the same person.
My initial post was written 30 minutes after my last date, so i was pretty upset, frustrated etc. I've since had time to calm down.
I'm going to stop at the two dates I've had, then come back in a few months and try once or twice more.
After thinking things over a bit, I've discovered what part of my nervousness may have been coming from. I think its the uh...umm...how do i say this?
The last date i had was a gfe. I kept wondering while we were kissing, how many dicks i now had on my lips...when i ate her out, i was thinking about how many dicks were recently in there. The "yuck" factor.
Not even worried about std's. Oral is safe. The chance of getting something nasty is small. I think even with these hot naked ladies trying to please me, i was slightly repulsed. Then i was thinking that even though they were friendly, smiling, accommodating... they were probably just wanting the whole thing to be over. ...
Bottom line, this just may not be my thing.
But to me, both encounters were failures on my part... i won't be ok just walking away from this. Haha, like you said, im young.
So I'm still saying that your problem isn't that unusual, you sound OK, you can have another go at it whenever you want (next week sooner or 20 years later) but you can also get advice from the coaching staff before you take the plunge and dive head first into the pool. Some of that advice has already come out in the replies.
You've got your whole life ahead of you. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
-- Modified on 10/18/2015 11:28:39 PM
Your play by play analysis made me laugh.
And you're correct. In hindsight i made some tactical errors.
I'll either give up for a while, or reevaluate and attack again with better planning.
First, it is ok to not want to have sex with escorts. That is almost certainly the majority opinion. Not wanting to have sex with escorts != low sex drive or erectile dysfunction or whatever. Not wanting to have sex with escorts = not wanting to have sex with escorts.
Second, everyone here REALLY likes fucking escorts. We are like the guy who will talk to you about golf for hours if you give him the slightest opportunity. And the guy who has 6 drivers in his bag just in case. We are not rational on the subject in that sense.
Third, your curiosity seems purely intellectual. And you satisfied that curiosity when you went through all the motions: research, contact, verification, meet etc... You now know what the deal is with escorts. But if your brain and body were not curious (aroused) by the prospect you should not be surprised that they sat on the sidelines.
Fourth, if you want (and I am definitely not saying you should) you might consider looking at photos and reviews for some woman who engages your body and brain: gets you sexually aroused. You know, someone really close to your physical ideal or sexual type.
Fifth, if you are not a troll (which I think is more and more likely) at the very least you have a great damn story to break out if you get the opportunity. And also, something you will look back on and laugh about
All very valid points.
Except your last paragraph.
I don't frequent these boards as much the regulars here, but I'm curious why you would think I'd post this just for laughs. I can provide ridiculous amounts of detail and links to the two providers I met with to prove validity.
Who would publicly announce their impotence? Where's the trolling?
I had a frustrating couple of encounters and came to a place where I hoped to find some advice, differing viewpoints, and maybe a little comfort that there's nothing wrong with me.
Mission accomplished.
Second, everyone here REALLY likes fucking escorts. We are like the guy who will talk to you about golf for hours if you give him the slightest opportunity. And the guy who has 6 drivers in his bag just in case. We are not rational on the subject in that sense.
Third, your curiosity seems purely intellectual. And you satisfied that curiosity when you went through all the motions: research, contact, verification, meet etc... You now know what the deal is with escorts. But if your brain and body were not curious (aroused) by the prospect you should not be surprised that they sat on the sidelines.
Fourth, if you want (and I am definitely not saying you should) you might consider looking at photos and reviews for some woman who engages your body and brain: gets you sexually aroused. You know, someone really close to your physical ideal or sexual type.
Fifth, if you are not a troll (which I think is more and more likely) at the very least you have a great damn story to break out if you get the opportunity. And also, something you will look back on and laugh about.
Besides, even if you are a troll, you are the most fine mannered troll to ever grace these boards and I say let there be a hundred more of you.
Now, go out, get a drink or two, and get laid.
Then report back
Hahaha. Thanks. Nah, think I'll lay low for a bit.
The whole experience kinda...well...I'm ok going sex less for while now.
I always book my appointments well in advance. Then I hold out for 10-14 days before without a release. When the session rolls around staying hard isn't an issue, and when I finally cum it feels beyond amazing!
Hahaha. I did the exact opposite.
Jerked off a couple of times thinking I'd last longer. ..
That worked out well! Hehe.
No need to see Susie Palm if the girl has MSOG. If your 2 providers are attractive, repeat, relax and you may have a better time.
an appointment to get the first experience?
Some excellent advice from members here and I changed my approach and met with success.
This morning I was a newbie with zero dates under my belt. Now I'm a frustrated newbie with two encounters, hundreds of dollars lighter, and some absurdly blue balls...
I had two separate dates, and both went down the same way. I simply could not - if my very life depended on it, get and stay hard. Zero releases. A total of 2 hours ripping condoms off my dead head.
I don't get it. Do you guys just chug Viagra beforehand?
I'm in my 30's, never had a whisper of any ED in my life, no weird body image issues, doubts about my "size" etc... Both of the ladies were well reviewed, attractive, kind, understanding. I wasn't worried about LE, never even crossed my mind. I just couldn't get hard for more than a minute.
Ask any of my exgf's and every one will tell you I am annoyingly horny, ready to "go" at an instant, with a stupid amount of stamina.
I just couldn't overcome my nervousness. Maybe this hobby, which I thought would be the best thing next to pepperoni pizza, is just not for me?
Kind of messes with your head. Now I'm going to be thinking of nothing else the next time. With any girl.
I was not truthfully really attracted to either one. Honestly.
Someone on here asked why/how i chose the two ladies i did.
Part of it was convenience. They were in areas near where i live, places i knew.
Didn't want to be strolling around in the dark in some creepy area my first couple of times out.
Part of it was i chose women who i found to be...well i didn't want my first experiences to be with "perfect 10's". Why start at the top? I thought i would go with some nicer ladies who weren't super models and slowly work my way up.
I don't know. That was my thinking. These weren't women who in civvie life i would ever consider my type. But they were attractive enough where i thought i could enjoy for an hour.
Since I'm being all honest and such, I'll confess
Lady number.one had a really really smelly puss. Like i couldn't get the smell off for a couple of hours. Lady number two, was better, but not really great.
I was fucking clean. Scrubbed trimmed, brushed. Even held off smoking so there would be no ciggie smell. These ladies just weren't fresh.
Someone on here asked why/how i chose the two ladies i did.
Part of it was convenience. They were in areas near where i live, places i knew.
Didn't want to be strolling around in the dark in some creepy area my first couple of times out.
Part of it was i chose women who i found to be...well i didn't want my first experiences to be with "perfect 10's". Why start at the top? I thought i would go with some nicer ladies who weren't super models and slowly work my way up.
I don't know. That was my thinking. These weren't women who in civvie life i would ever consider my type. But they were attractive enough where i thought i could enjoy for an hour.
Since I'm being all honest and such, I'll confess
Lady number.one had a really really smelly puss. Like i couldn't get the smell off for a couple of hours. Lady number two, was better, but not really great.
I was fucking clean. Scrubbed trimmed, brushed. Even held off smoking so there would be no ciggie smell. These ladies just weren't fresh.
Keep in mind that (most) providers are professionals. They are good at what they do *because they have a LOT of experience. That's the whole point! You wouldn't pay an inexperienced person top dollar, would you?
Do you have VIP so you can read the complete reviews of the ladies before you booked an appointment? If you don't have VIP, get it. It will help you choose better ladies to see. Next time, pick a lady you think is really hot and who has plenty of great reviews.
Finally: Don't take Cialis or Viagra. You may not be able to finish. Also, don't masturbate for a couple of days.
-- Modified on 10/19/2015 9:08:43 AM
to have a good time with most ladies. A few times I have arrived at an appointment and was not in the mood for sex.
I have picked ladies for convenience or price. hit or miss with those ladies.
I also tried ladies who I didnt think were "my type". One was a supposed PSE and she was less than sexy. i just wanted it to be over. The other ended up being my favorite who I've seen many, many times.
Look for a lady that makes you sport wood she could do pull ups on and see what happens.
Someone on here asked why/how i chose the two ladies i did.
Part of it was convenience. They were in areas near where i live, places i knew.
Didn't want to be strolling around in the dark in some creepy area my first couple of times out.
Part of it was i chose women who i found to be...well i didn't want my first experiences to be with "perfect 10's". Why start at the top? I thought i would go with some nicer ladies who weren't super models and slowly work my way up.
I don't know. That was my thinking. These weren't women who in civvie life i would ever consider my type. But they were attractive enough where i thought i could enjoy for an hour.
Since I'm being all honest and such, I'll confess
Lady number.one had a really really smelly puss. Like i couldn't get the smell off for a couple of hours. Lady number two, was better, but not really great.
I was fucking clean. Scrubbed trimmed, brushed. Even held off smoking so there would be no ciggie smell. These ladies just weren't fresh.
It looks like you got yourself into a negative feedback loop due to anything from trying to "get your money's worth" and maximize your sexy activities, paying too much attention to the clock, and legitimate fears (LE, std, robbery) that may be out of proportion to the situation. Here are some avenues you can pursue to remedy this are:
1. Treat it like a one night stand. As you've identified, even in a one night stand there's substantial time spent building rapport. Book a longer appointment (90 mins at least, maybe 2+ hours) and take some time to get comfortable and genuinely flirt with the knowledge that you're definitely going to score. Repeating with the same provider will increase comfort if that's the issue.
2. Treat it as a break from reality, or perhaps the best kind of spa appointment. It's a service built around satisfying your pleasure. If the illicit nature of this is off-putting, then you just have to change your mindset to view it as frivolous sexy fun.
3. Treat her as a masturbatory aid (with all due respect). There's probably some fantasy in your head or particular act that totally gets you off anytime. You can be a bit selfish and respectfully request that she pleases you exactly how you want it (within reason - unless you have a kink that's really out there, if she's experienced then she's seen most all of it and will be clear about her boundaries).
Beating yourself up about performance anxiety is self-defeating and once you "break the seal," you'll find that it gets easier to get in the proper mindset. There are countless ways to play here, and a big part of the fun is the journey to find what's most fulfilling for you. Take it or leave it and enjoy yourself!
Haha. Im a glutton for punishment (no not literally, maybe some of you fellas like that stuff
Have a week to prepare. Mentally. Set up two hours, so time enough to get comfortable. Will communicate via email as to what i want out of it.
Well reviewed lady. This is it. If i fail then i shall gracefully retire from the hobby.
If this works out, well, im going to need a 2nd job.
I'll post back here in a week with results (whether you want it or not!)
Thanks to everyone who posted advice and PM'ed me.
I'd like to thank my parents, my dog muffy...and Jesus.
-- Modified on 10/19/2015 7:08:33 PM
Really?
Well guess i just blew it.
How are you ever supposed to know what is and is not on the menu?
Just be sure not to mention, or even hint at, anything intimate in your email.
-- Modified on 10/19/2015 7:08:33 PM
Talking about specific sex acts, even if you don't mention them in conjunction with money is still a serious no no. You may get away with it from time to time, but that still doesn't mean it's accepted behavior by most escorts.
Ok. But this specific one has a list of services available, with a note specifying to connect via email with any questions or requests.
Sounds like plain English to me as an ok to discuss things normally not allowed.
Also in general, i think it's a good idea for both parties to have an understanding before meeting. ..maybe my first two dates would have been better if i could have discussed what i was after instead of just showing up.
I've pretty much figured out just meeting some pretty girl and going with regular old sex really isn't going to do anything for me.
Also in general, i think it's a good idea for both parties to have an understanding before meeting. ..maybe my first two dates would have been better if i could have discussed what i was after instead of just showing up.
If you read her reviews, you don't need to discuss intimate things in email while setting an appointment (exchanging sex for money is illegal). You only email to discuss booking her time (exchanging time for money is legal).
Perhaps you should buy VIP, read the newbie guide, and start anew.
As many people say, VIP membership costs less than the price of one spoiled date. You've already blown money on TWO bad experiences...
-- Modified on 10/20/2015 12:43:05 AM
Already am VIP.
Read hundreds of reviews for ladies. Literally.
And i did read the newbie guide.
Didn't change anything. My first two experiences sucked.
Also in general, i think it's a good idea for both parties to have an understanding before meeting. ..maybe my first two dates would have been better if i could have discussed what i was after instead of just showing up.
You will have a very good understanding of what she offers if you buy VIP and read the FULL text of her reviews.
If you read her reviews, you don't need to discuss intimate things in email while setting an appointment (exchanging sex for money is illegal). You only email to discuss booking her time (exchanging time for money is legal).
Perhaps you should buy VIP, read the newbie guide, and start anew.
As many people say, VIP membership costs less than the price of one spoiled date. You've already blown money on TWO bad experiences...
-- Modified on 10/20/2015 12:43:05 AM
There's a reason why the vast majority of us don't advertise sex acts and don't discuss them with potential clients: it's incriminating. I and most reputable ladies will cease communication as soon as he starts mentioning (or even implying) sexual activity. If you can't glean what's generally available by reading reviews, you should probably find another prospect. Engaging in dialogue about illegal sex acts is a huge no-no. There are ladies out there who will discuss that stuff prior to meeting, but you could be incriminating yourself in a potential sting or setting yourself up to get robbed. LE and scam artists will say whatever they think you want to hear just to get you in the door.
We're not telling you this because we're paranoid. We're telling you this because you seem determined to go down a path that could end up getting you blacklisted, scammed, robbed or arrested. I know you think discussing that stuff is a good idea, but I strongly advise you to listen to the advice you're being given here by both the guys and the gals.
Just out of curiosity, what is it that you're wanting to discuss with these ladies?
Ok. But this specific one has a list of services available, with a note specifying to connect via email with any questions or requests.
Sounds like plain English to me as an ok to discuss things normally not allowed.
Also in general, i think it's a good idea for both parties to have an understanding before meeting. ..maybe my first two dates would have been better if i could have discussed what i was after instead of just showing up.
I've pretty much figured out just meeting some pretty girl and going with regular old sex really isn't going to do anything for me.
Viewing this date as "make or break" and then spending a week building up the fantasy in your head is a recipe for disappointment. You'll inevitably look for where she fails to live up to your fantasy rather than enjoying the encounter for what it is.
The absolute worst way to approach a date is with a script and checklist in hand. My best experiences have been when we're (I'm) lost in the moment savoring all the glorious sensations, rather than distracted by whatever sex acts we haven't gotten to yet. Unless you're here to have a very particular kink indulged, you shouldn't have to communicate your expectations to her. Reviews should give you a good idea of what you're getting, and everything is YMMV dependent on various factors. Explicit correspondence may get your appointment canceled.
Relax, be easygoing, communicative and have low (but not negative) expectations, and then you're assured to have a great time and be delightfully surprised.
See that's just it.
I don't want just "sex" i think i am after a very particular experience.
The absolute worst way to approach a date is with a script and checklist in hand. My best experiences have been when we're (I'm) lost in the moment savoring all the glorious sensations, rather than distracted by whatever sex acts we haven't gotten to yet. Unless you're here to have a very particular kink indulged, you shouldn't have to communicate your expectations to her. Reviews should give you a good idea of what you're getting, and everything is YMMV dependent on various factors. Explicit correspondence may get your appointment canceled.
Relax, be easygoing, communicative and have low (but not negative) expectations, and then you're assured to have a great time and be delightfully surprised.
Things might change. Hard for a hooker to figure out what it is you want when you don't even know, or a least can't seem to articulate it to her.
Figure out what experience you are after and then find a lady that seems to be on board with that. I completely agree with CP...setting the bar in the stratosphere does you absolutely no good and when a hooker finds out you are too hard to please, she might not want to see you.
I know what I want now. But it's not OK to discuss these things beforehand with a provider.
Either on the phone, text or email. So what? I just show up and spring it on her then? And she turns me down and then what? I'm out another few hundred dollars because I can't discuss any freaking details until I'm already there and committed?
That system sucks. Yeah, I know this is all illegal, and the rules are there to keep all safe, but just randomly meeting providers hoping that one will be "it" or if I see someone enough times more 'menu' items become available. is that it? That's it in a nutshell
Instead of all of us talking in circles, just lay it out there and you'll get some specific advice, maybe even some recommendations on who to see. This is the forum where you can lay it out there and get blunt feedback.
If your fantasy is more "production"-based (ex. clothes, role play, location), then yes, it's not a big deal to request that upfront. If it's specific sex acts, you can sometimes get away with code words and innuendo, but it's a touchy area.
That "plain old sex" just will not cut it. Geez I hope he is not into anything dangerous. I am now worried for the hooker he sees..she may not have any idea what this guy is really like.
The mere fact he will not share has me thinking it is something he is either ashamed of but likes and is afraid of the backlash he might get.
Fine!
I'll tell!!!
There's a provider who posted in this thread. Tobi. Follow her link.
Under the Kink section. That's it. Mostly.
And no, im not into anything crazy like you guys are imagining!
I don't want 3 asian girls to take a dump on my chest...
You can ask about that stuff. There's a reason why many pro doms don't provide conventional sex. Even if you wanted to get shat on, there are plenty who will indulge you for the right price. No shame, maybe it's time to take your questions to the BDSM board here.
Haha. Yeah. I'm new to this, so openly discussing what gets me off...is weird to me. But yeah, that's more or less what i want.
I have a provider lined up to do just that. ..just deciding if I'm actually going to go through with it.
I'd hate to blow $450 and get hit with another case of limp dick....
What it is you want, then there might be a way to help you out. It cannot be that weird, and we, meaning almost everyone on here, has heard it all. Have you tried the ISO board and put it out there to see if anyone can and will do what you want? Keep in mind, if it is something degrading or just plain gross I am not surprised most hookers will say no, BUT there will be at least one hooker willing to do almost anything.
I am guessing that what you want might not be a general menu item, more of a fetish type thing? Listen to what others have said.. you might have to see someone a few times and then "spring" it on her. Yes that is the nature of this ILLEGAL business. Hookers get caught when they spell out via email or phone sex acts. That is why hookers do not do this, careful hookers anyway.
And getting down on those who won't, well that is just plain ignorant, you now know why a safe hooker will not agree to do x yor z when she does not know who is on the end of the phone or email.
So yes that's it...looks like you need to find yourself another hobby or get with the program
The very best "sensual experiences" require a certain amount of trust and comfort which may take a few appointments to fully develop. Sure, reviews can give you a baseline of expectations but it's hard to judge how well beyond that your experience will be before you meet. I've had encounters where I was totally psyched due to preappointment rapport, only to find no spark, and I've booked on a whim and have had my mind blown.
If you really want to enjoy yourself, then accept that you'll have to go through some trial & error to find what you're looking for. And if this is not working for you, it's so easy to quit.