A guy was stranded on a desert island with Heidi Klum. Initially, he played it cool, not making any moves on her for several weeks.  
 
Finally, he asked her if they could start a physical relationship, so as to attend to each other's needs.  Heidi was game and a very nice sexual relationship began.  
 
After several months, the guy approached Heidi and said, "I have a problem. It's kind of a guy thing, but I need to ask you a favour."  Heidi replied, "Okay," to which he asked, "Can I borrow your eyebrow pencil?"  Heidi looked at him in confusion, but obliged.  The guy then asked, "Do you mind if I use the eyebrow pencil to draw a mustache on you?"  Heidi was growing worried, but again obliged, so the guy drew a mustache on her.  

Then the guy said, "Can you wear some of my clothes? I need for you to look more like a man."  Heidi was becoming disappointed at this point, but hesitantly put on his clothes.  
 
Finally, the guy said to Heidi, "Do you mind if I call you Phil?"  Heidi had now become very dejected, and said "No, I guess not, you can call me Phil."  So, the guy reached out and grabbed Heidi by the arms and shouted "Dr. Phil, you'll never believe who I'm fucking!