This line was from a popular song a few years back. It may have meaning in this context because I think most hobbyists are in this for the variety. We have read oh so many times when a hobbyist gets too involved for the comfort of either or about the lady who gets jealous of when we "see" other women. In either case, it's not the position you should find yourself. Sometimes, the advernture goes. Being the perennial hunter, the hobbyist is always on the look for the next thrill in a different wrapper; why do you think we pay for NSA? Familiarity does breed contempt as well. And lastly, some of just go quiet in the night. My good friend did just that. He and I were hobby whores back about 3 years ago and just as suddenly, he left for the beach and doesn't partake. No problems that I could tell because, he's got a 32 y.o. honey with an ass that you could set a beer on. So don't lament the passing of time or people. The names and faces always change.
increases. IMHO sometimes you have to distance yourself because you perhaps start looking forward to seeing the provider a little too much. I'm sure there are other reasons. However, for hobbyist who like the familiarity of going to a lady on a regular basis, you like to think there is a bond (I won't say friendship). But its aa fine line. Just my point of view I guess.
-- Modified on 7/21/2005 6:29:57 PM
...the gentleman who hit, hit, hit, hit and then ran over you. Call one up, say "Hi, baby. You popped into my head, I haven't seen you in awhile, what's up?" Communication solves 99% of all problems and answers most questions.
Personally, I thought Okrah had nice breasts, but you, you are a trophy !!
Beats me. In my experience, it is the lady who disappears, gets married, starts a new career, moves. I've been seeing my favorite lady friend for 5+ years.
There are others of course. When we click I keep going back. It keeps getting better as we learn our way around each other. It's not love, it's as you say. The rapport grows with the increasing comfort level which makes it all the more fun.
How often do you see her in the 5+ years? It may make a difference in the relationship. Though it's not love, I think the lust may wear off if you see her like 2 or 3 times a week. I've been told they'd get bored. What's your secret in keeping the relationship interesting? Someone mentioned that you need to keep it refreshing and have enough "strangeness" in each encounter to avoid boredom.
About every six weeks. Boring? Never. Each encounter is different & hot in a unique way. Each knows the other is safe. Each knows what the other likes. It's playtime. People golf & play raquet ball with the same partner for years. Why would erotic play be different? Naturally, I "cheat" on her between encounters. I just remember where to return for the really good stuff.
seeing her once every week or every two weeks and tell me if one of you doesn't get bored with the other.
....that is what I was trying to get at but not very clearly.
Why burn yourself out and get bored? I enjoy finding compatible ladies and sort of rotating around. We both lower our risk and the playtime just gets better. So far no one has gotten bored. The ladies are the ones who retire or move away from town. Two to five years seems like the norm.
The other factor is that the lady I have been seeing longest is quite inventive. She thinks up new things to do each time. In a way it is like seeing someone different each visit. One memorable visit she was a lap dancer. Never get anyhing like that in a strip club! Next time without preamble she sprawled out on the bed to be serviced. Next time she was a little dom. Wild. Maybe that is the "secret".
The next most frequently seen lady loves what she does, shows it, and makes me feel really good. Very expressive & very expert.
The next most frequently seen lady is just right for spending a relaxing afternoon playing. She is a pleaser with an active brain. Come to think of it I am seeing her every 6 weeks too.
I said" I'm gonna keep coming back to see you until you retire." She replied,"Good thing doesn't last forever you know." Then I said, "...or until one of us is bored with the other." She said, "that's it." That was perhaps my fourth time seeing her. I've now seen her about 10 times and not bored with her yet. I try not to see her too frequently to avoid the "familiarity breeds contempt" problem. She's the best kisser I've ever had. The kissing part has always been better than the sex itsel.
...and also ask, what city do you work in?
I've told other providers this: sometimes the guy will feel himself getting infatuated. For most hobbyists and providers, falling in love is just not what's intended. Some of us guys are also informed that just breeching this topic with a provider might get us embargoed. If a guy is getting infatuated, that's a really painful thing, and that could be why they'll disappear without saying anything, because disappearing is much less painful than that.
Furthermore, when a guy is getting infatuated, some of us just see as many other providers as we can: kind of deprogramming ourselves, or causing interference with the emotion.
Then, some guys like variety. They just like the dance, and love it when it's played out with so many different women. For them, after the relationship has gone to where the fantasy is fulfilled, it's time for them to move on.
And then there are other guys, and I guess I'm in this group, who aren't economically able to get into this as they want to. I want to see every woman that I've seen again, and then I want to see additional women, and almost weekly the "list" grows. I could only gradually get the money for this. So, the more women I see, the slower and bigger the cycle of sex partners gets.
So, perhaps a few of your clients are just haven't got back to you yet...
BTW, I am honored to have you on my wish list, Rachel where breathtakingly beautiful redheads with dazzling upper proportions will always go to the top.
-- Modified on 7/21/2005 9:42:05 PM
-- Modified on 7/22/2005 5:55:59 AM
Until they undress, and then suddenly, I can only say parts of words.
And oh, you have a lot of inches in the best places. My heart skips beats on seeing that you have a wickedly beautiful face and a smile to die for if it doesn't kill me first.
On my map, I'm putting a red pushpin on Denver.
Rachel, sometimes it has to do with basic lack of consideration. As unpleasant as it may be to think about it, parhaps to those gentlemen you have been something special until the next special thing comes along. And they don't seem to feel that they should let you know that they have moved on. In other words, they have the connection backwards, you are a (I hate using these terms) provider first, and person second. So, they think, why bother explaining? It's interesting, considering everyone seems to want a "GFE" experience, that they won't at least treat you like one. Another reason why I so admire you ladies who give me so much.
...because to me, the ladies are wonderful people who are providers. How could you think of the person who just made you feel so good as anything less than special? If she & I "click" why wouldn't we keep seeing each other? She isn't my SO but she is my playmate. This is about two adults playing together. It's about innocent fun, not serious relationships.
As one well reviewed lady put it to me, "You have to be able to distinguish between love and lust." Exactly.
If any of you guys are running away to avoid emotional attachment, think this through. If you are having fun together, and it keeps getting better, why not keep playing? It isn't love, it's lust.
So many things can happen to make a hobbiest move on:
Financial difficulty
New ATF or SO
Moving to another city
Getting jesus
Getting an STD
Are just a few off the top of my head.
The bottom line is that stuff happens.
If a gent wants comfortable sex, with someone he is used to...familiar with, deepely connected to...he has sex with his SO.
For many hobbiests, it's all about the new and unfamiliar.
When you become comfortable and familiar...it's time to move on.
I'm sure this is not true for everyone. But perhaps it is for many.
I had a young lady I saw frequently who had mentioned how business had fallen off because of phone number problems. I told her I'd see what I could do. I put a note on the boards wishing her a happy birthday, how hot and special our recent date was, and how glad I was that she got the phone issue resolved. I put her correct no. in the message. Later that day I called to let her know what I'd done. She was ecstatic! "Oh, hon. My phones been ringing off the hook. I'm booked solid for the week. Next time I see you, I'm only gonna charge you $150." Not necessary, but WTF. So, next time I saw her sure enough, it was $150; but, she asked if we could make it a 45 minute session this time cause she had to go visit her father. Now, I know I could be understanding, but she'd made the initial offer out of appreciation. That visit should have been made into an all-time dick bender, imo. If she knew she couldn't see me for the full hr. she should have told me. She could've said she wants time to make it extra special and not rushed. I haven't felt the same about her since and have been visiting other providers.
Dont blame you.
She shouldve called you before hand and said what you stated
case of
woulda shoulda coulda.
I would re-schedule before I saw a gentleman caller without being 100% and if I offered him a special "thank you" session I would make sure it was more of a celebration to be remembered.
I'm sorry that happened to you and I have heard similar stories from my guests. It doesen't matter what the industry, either we pride ourselves on the experience we provide or we don't. I was raised to do my very best the first time or don't do it at all 
Thanks for your response
...that the gentleman was hit by a bus. Chances are you're not on the family's "to be informed" list.
Now if this is happening a lot, I'd suggest you find an incall location with less nearby bus traffic.
-- Modified on 7/22/2005 5:11:19 AM
Personally, I do not think that I could ever just go quietly into the night from those few special ladies with whom I have an ongoing rela***, affa***, infa***, whatever.
But then, we can never know what life will bring or what turns it will take. As I look back on the last two years of my life (two years to the day since I found this little world of ours!), I could never have imagined 3 years ago that I would be what I am today, doing what I do.
...even gets married. Maybe he wants to start looking seriously for an SO. (You're not in it for the relationship, but maybe the guy decides he wants one eventually.) Maybe he gets back with his wife, or he starts getting conscience qualms about her, or she finds out what he's up to and delivers an ultimatum. Maybe he has a business reversal, and he can no longer pay the fare. (This is a BIG one with guys. It's a masculinity issue with many of us, and we don't like to talk about it any more than we like to talk about nonperformance. In fact, the one very often causes the other.) Guys look around for a little variety, or their attention just wanders. Sometimes they plain burn out and quit the hobby of their own accord. Have I left anything out? It's pretty much the same with the women, I hear.
Whatever a particular guy's reason might be, Rachel, it'd have to be PRETTY DAMN COMPELLING for him to pass up another shot at you, because, honey, you are terrific. And you KNOW I think so!
-- Modified on 7/22/2005 10:45:28 AM
We men may be powerful, but when it comes to performance we can be very fragile. I was enchanted by an exquisite lady who just blurted out when I was unable to perform with a cover "Then why are we wasting our time." Never saw her again. Neglect in going weeks or months failing to respond to emails and phone calls will cause me to "move on." I have one lady who emails me unsolicited (with my permission) just to tell me she misses me and thinks of our last encounter. Will see her again when my stresses get relieved.
-- Modified on 7/22/2005 5:23:59 PM
-- Modified on 7/23/2005 3:00:11 AM
Wonderful providers like you would receive wonderful reviews on a regular basis, then new clients want to see you. With those new comers and the regulars, there would be a long line unless they see five guys everyday (I doubt it). The result could be that some guys from both parties cannot wait and just move on.... I guess it is a process that occurs naturally.
I did my ATF a favor sometime ago. Her business had been slow so I told her that I would submit a good review. She was happy about that so I did. As expected, she received hundreds of emails and thanked me for that. Now, she's been too busy since then and I have moved on..
Holy crap, Rachel, I've just been reading your reviews and I had to stop after 3 just to draw breath!!!!!
were more helpful than you know. Clearly I had taken their departures to personally. After months of passion, fun, continued/renewed excitement and what I thought had become some level of friendship (for lack of a better word), I was just taken aback at their seemingly sudden disapperance.
All your responses helped put things in perspective and I am most appreciative!
Ya'll take care!
Rachel
You've got a great smile!
