Newbie - FAQ

Most of the provider discussion is just fun stuff
Bob.Sugar 629 reads
posted

Some do start threADs...and that's fine as well.  To just have the boards be a place for the "boys" is something I wouldn't want.  Nor do most of the guys either.  Those that just seek to interact with other guys can go to other sites where guys can hang with guys.  LOL

I've had many many PM exchanges with gals that morph into email friends and IRL friends.  Many of those gals are fun to chat with...otherwise I wouldn't waste my time having those chats off the boards.  However I met them through these boards.

I'm sure that the dude babbling that he sees it his way is one of the guys that really prefers women to be seen and not heard.  Sounds like a misogynist  LOL
Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
So I was recently engaging in what I thought was idle post-sex chat when the gentleman started talking about my participation here on TER.  It quickly became clear that he believes that all provider participation is marketing, nothing more.    
 When I told him that's not what prompts me to join in,  that I've even gotten some wonderfully helpful advice by posting questions on the Newbie board, he responded with a smirk, "you know what we call those, right?  T-h-r-e-A-D-S."    
   
 So, no matter what I ask, or how my post is worded, if I start a thread it is considered a threAD?    
   
 He dismissively replied that I could find my answers elsewhere, by searching the boards, or by asking one of my friends.      
   
 I was ready to drop it at that point, but he went on to say that TER is for discussion among hobbyists, about providers, and the provider posts just clutter and clog the boards.    
   
 That convinced me that nothing I said would get through to such a closed mind, and decided not to further waste my breath on the topic.  
   
 But it got me thinking.... is this a common perception of the client participants?  That providers are ONLY participating as a marketing tool and that any thread started by us is a "look at me" type of post?  
   
 Is it also a commonly held belief or opinion that TER is primarily intended for discussion between clients/hobbyists and that providers basically don't have a place in these discussions?  
   
   
 I'm really very curious about how provider-posters are perceived here.  :-)  
   
   
   
 xoxoxoxoxo  
   
   
   
 PS~ Yes, I'm aware of the irony inherent to posting a thread inquiring as to whether all threads started by providers are viewed as threADS.  ;-)

So I was recently engaging in what I thought was idle post-sex chat when the gentleman started talking about my participation here on TER.  It quickly became clear that he believes that all provider participation is marketing, nothing more.  
When I told him that's not what prompts me to join in,  that I've even gotten some wonderfully helpful advice by posting questions on the Newbie board, he responded with a smirk, "you know what we call those, right?  T-h-r-e-A-D-S."    

So, no matter what I ask, or how my post is worded, if I start a thread it is considered a threAD?  

He dismissively replied that I could find my answers elsewhere, by searching the boards, or by asking one of my friends.    

I was ready to drop it at that point, but he went on to say that TER is for discussion among hobbyists, about providers, and the provider posts just clutter and clog the boards.  

That convinced me that nothing I said would get through to such a closed mind, and decided not to further waste my breath on the topic.

But it got me thinking.... is this a common perception of the client participants?  That providers are ONLY participating as a marketing tool and that any thread started by us is a "look at me" type of post?

Is it also a commonly held belief or opinion that TER is primarily intended for discussion between clients/hobbyists and that providers basically don't have a place in these discussions?

 
I'm really very curious about how provider-posters are perceived here.  :-)

 

xoxoxoxoxo

 

PS~ Yes, I'm aware of the irony inherent to posting a thread inquiring as to whether all threads started by providers are viewed as threADS.  ;-)

Anyone who has something to add to the board is welcome to participate.  I welcome the input of all contributors, both providers and hobbyists.  While your client may feel your posts could be construed as ads, I disagree.  This board is here for the benefit of those who need help in navigating the hobby safely, and everyone who has ideas is encouraged to chime in and share.  It's a safe place to ask questions and get answers w/o fear of ridicule.

LLAP,
Swim

GaGambler659 reads

but to call all OP's by the ladies "threADs" is just plain ridiculous and smacks of the guy just being a guy who deep down just really doesn't like hookers although I assume he does like sex with them.

One last thing about threADs, ThreADs are not created equal. Some threADs are just obvious "look at me!!!" posts and ad nothing to the conversation and those threADs should be discouraged. Other threADs do add to the conversation and although to many of us it's pretty obvious the lady is wanting guys to notice her, if done in an interesting manner, I actually welcome some threADs.

Posted By: GaGambler
but to call all OP's by the ladies "threADs" is just plain ridiculous and smacks of the guy just being a guy who deep down just really doesn't like hookers although I assume he does like sex with them.
This is my thought, as well.   He may even have anger issues towards all women, I don't know, but it definitely seems he has no respect for providers.  

 

xoxoxoxox

I am a newbie, and come to this board for guidance, not to advertise myself whatsoever.

I hope that providers continue to post here as not being able to access the provider board at this time leaves this board as the only input I can get.

I like the idea of providers and hobbyists being able to exchange thoughts and ideas.
Seems to me, that goes a long way towards making sure both sides have the most fun.

There are cynical people everywhere in this world, I just choose to avoid those types and  
am drawn to the helpful, kind, funny, witty types instead.

Post on!!

Just my 2 cents.....

B

other boards. Many of us get tired of seeing (note--I did not say reading) the multitude of ISO threads and much of the other BS about non-hobby related topics.  

I know I have visited with more than one provider whose interest was perked (yes, pun intended) by what she has said here despite her not having any reviews.

Play safe.

Bob.Sugar630 reads

Some do start threADs...and that's fine as well.  To just have the boards be a place for the "boys" is something I wouldn't want.  Nor do most of the guys either.  Those that just seek to interact with other guys can go to other sites where guys can hang with guys.  LOL

I've had many many PM exchanges with gals that morph into email friends and IRL friends.  Many of those gals are fun to chat with...otherwise I wouldn't waste my time having those chats off the boards.  However I met them through these boards.

I'm sure that the dude babbling that he sees it his way is one of the guys that really prefers women to be seen and not heard.  Sounds like a misogynist  LOL

Posted By: DebbieNoonerGirl
So I was recently engaging in what I thought was idle post-sex chat when the gentleman started talking about my participation here on TER.  It quickly became clear that he believes that all provider participation is marketing, nothing more.    
 When I told him that's not what prompts me to join in,  that I've even gotten some wonderfully helpful advice by posting questions on the Newbie board, he responded with a smirk, "you know what we call those, right?  T-h-r-e-A-D-S."    
   
 So, no matter what I ask, or how my post is worded, if I start a thread it is considered a threAD?    
   
 He dismissively replied that I could find my answers elsewhere, by searching the boards, or by asking one of my friends.      
   
 I was ready to drop it at that point, but he went on to say that TER is for discussion among hobbyists, about providers, and the provider posts just clutter and clog the boards.    
   
 That convinced me that nothing I said would get through to such a closed mind, and decided not to further waste my breath on the topic.  
   
 But it got me thinking.... is this a common perception of the client participants?  That providers are ONLY participating as a marketing tool and that any thread started by us is a "look at me" type of post?  
   
 Is it also a commonly held belief or opinion that TER is primarily intended for discussion between clients/hobbyists and that providers basically don't have a place in these discussions?  
   
   
 I'm really very curious about how provider-posters are perceived here.  :-)  
   
   
   
 xoxoxoxoxo  
   
   
   
 PS~ Yes, I'm aware of the irony inherent to posting a thread inquiring as to whether all threads started by providers are viewed as threADS.  ;-)

Here_I_Go474 reads

I disagree with that client.  I get almost nothing out of most client posts since the vast majority are the same group just fighting with and insulting each other.   I come here for provider perspective, and wish there was more.

a service to buyers, and you post on these boards, you are marketing.  And there is nothing to be ashamed of for that.

Marketing is what makes it possible for us to evaluate a person, and decide to look further into their services, etc.

But obviously some gals also post for any number of reasons:  Wanting to share a funny story, ask a question about something, blow off some steam, thank someone for something, etc.

There is no dichotomy here.  Many things have multiple uses

dakine18669 reads

As much as many say that having providers contributing here is nice, it is also a potential trouble area. I have seen it time & time again on other P4P boards (escort, massage, stripclub, etc) where the customers hold back some honest criticisms because they don't want to upset some of the women on the board, or be retaliated against. In general the providers here usually do add a nice contribution, but I can't help but long for the locker room where we can talk amongst ourselves and not have to worry about offending delicate ears. At least the RO board is here for that

The johns are way more sensitive to anything other than sugar coating the reality. Ask any hooker that has said it like it is and she will tell you that the responses are comical....butt hurt crybabies come out of the woodwork in droves

GaGambler557 reads

are guys who think the RO board is "private"

but don't fool yourself, there are plenty of "butt hurt crybabies" from the hooker side of the equation too, and just as many who are completely clueless.

Why not have a board for tricks and a board for hookers and then each can visit and see what the other really feels. So many hurt feelings in a fantasy realm where one charges and one rents ...how can that ever be seen as resembling real life?

regardless of whether its a provider or hobbyist as being helpful.  Understanding both sides of the equation and perceptions of each is why I frequent this board.  Even though I've been in this world for a number of years, there are situations that I've haven't encountered yet.  

Knowing I can come here and look for an answer, suggestions, advice is a nice resource to have.  

Please continue to offer up your perspective.  It is very much welcomed and appreciated.

Contrary to what some may think, we providers don't all want only the white-knight-types who will blow smoke up our asses and tell us only what they think we want to hear.

It's good to know that while some do consider provider-posting to be a form of marketing, that not all posts necessarily fall into that category, nor do all provider-posters.  

I've always felt that "everything is a situation" (that's a line from NYPD Blue) insomuch that every instance in life should be taken on a case-by-case basis.    

There are posters of every type who seem to post only to garner attention for themselves and/or stir up drama.  And those of every type who also post very witty or thought-provoking threads.  

I was seriously considering adopting an alias for all posting other than the answering of ISOs or in response to shill Friday posts.  Why?  Because the thought that any significant percentage of those reading my posts would consider anything I have to say to be marketing, "look at me" or a threAD really chaps my ass.    

 
The client who sparked all this gave me that wonderful feeling of, "this is our private club, and you're not invited" and I'm now kicking myself for allowing him that much power, even for a brief period of time.    

Again, thank you all for your perspectives, which have largely encouraged me to keep posting as myself.... although the igcognito approach definitely has its appeal.  ;-)

 

xoxoxoxoxoxo

Mine could be said to be a deterrent. LOL.  

And yes, go get an alias and say what you really want to say without the accusations of threADS or anything else they might not want to read..

Epsilon_Eridani572 reads

... you will see different answers to this question.

My answer is this...

There are a large majority of providers who do a lot of posting that are not considered "threADS", at least in my book.

Such as this thread you are starting... I don't see any direct, explicit advertisement about you and your services.  

Now, it's the fault of TER that they allow this stuff at the left side of the provider's posts:

Name of provider
the little envelope emoticon
See my TER Reviews

That's been the norm since from way back... I can't even tell you exactly when that started.

The point is this... if this guy you are referring to is making his argument based on that part that I just mentioned above, then, he's arguing with the WRONG person. If he has an issue with that, he needs to bring it up with TER, not you or anyone else.

If this guy thinks that all provider's posts are "threADS" based on that little bitty thing, then he's off is fookin' rocker!

Having said that piece... now, there are some providers that do ABUSE that privilege and constantly put their website and/or ad links at the bottom of their postings, then Yes, obviously, those are "threADS".  

That's an entirely different issue you are bringing up, though

So this guy could get himself qualified to participate there if he really wants a forum without providers on it.  But as has been said, I welcome the providers' input if it's relevant and informative.

Or do you really mean if it doesn't upset the tricks? Who judges what is "relative" and "informative"?

Thankfully, not all are like that, and can give us credit for more than trying to rent out a hole.  

(Not my words, his implication)

CU_next_weds614 reads

As a Newbie, 6 weeks into this, I recently got tremendous value out of provider's reply on one of the older Newbie threads.  

My first 2 sessions (with 2 different escorts) were "mistake free" in terms of logistics, minimizing risk, etc, but they felt really transactional and awkward.

The provider's board comments helped me re-think my attitude and my approach.  I was able to go into my 3rd session without a checklist, without a lot of expectations, instead simply focusing on enjoying my time and showing personal interest in the gorgeous young woman I was meeting.  I had an awesome time and will repeat with her, no doubt.

Thanks providers for sharing the woman's point of view - it really helps us newbies

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