Ohio

its a personal preference
wonderbuck 2 Reviews 353 reads
posted

Posted By: argentx
OK, I'm sure this has been brought up before.  The tide seems to ebb and flow, but right now a lot of the BP ads I see have embedded somewhere in them "No Black Men", or worse: "No Black Men Sorry".  Like the "Sorry" makes it all better.  
   
 I'm a 50 year-old black professional.  Grounded, financially stable, and completely comfortable with who I am.  I'm just out here looking for an engaging evening. I'm no different than the white guy next door in the same situation.  
   
 Ladies, what's the reason for this automatic rejection of part of the audience?  It's frustrating to me that you're totally willing to see some potentially abusive white guy, but will out and out refuse to accept me sight unseen.  
   
 Is it that the younger black men are disrespectful?  Or IS it just a race thing.  An even better question is how do I fight this?  I'm not one to beg someone to accept my money, so I usually just move on.  But it severely limits my options.  
   
 To their credit the professional providers I've met on this forum have never had an issue.  It's never come up and when I see them it's never even mentioned.  
   
 Thanks for your time!  This has been eating at me for awhile.
I don't know about you, but I am absolutely not at all attracted to BBW's.  It sucks for me because I have a fairly narrow range of the female physique that I find attractive..... you could not believe some of the very, very nasty emails I would get from BBW's slamming me because I had the audacity to be honest in my dating profile articulating that I am attracted to women who are physically fit and petite.  I take my fitness level seriously and am in fairly good physical condition.   Its as though I have NO RIGHT to be attracted to what I am attracted too... I suspect a fair number of women are simply not attracted to black men... FWIW

I honestly think part of it is that younger black men have ruined it for a LOT of providers particularly the higher end market.  Some of it is is a lack of attraction.  It is rare for me as a Caucasian male to see an black girl that I perceive as attractive in my eyes and it has nothing to do with skin color

OK, I'm sure this has been brought up before.  The tide seems to ebb and flow, but right now a lot of the BP ads I see have embedded somewhere in them "No Black Men", or worse: "No Black Men Sorry".  Like the "Sorry" makes it all better.

I'm a 50 year-old black professional.  Grounded, financially stable, and completely comfortable with who I am.  I'm just out here looking for an engaging evening. I'm no different than the white guy next door in the same situation.

Ladies, what's the reason for this automatic rejection of part of the audience?  It's frustrating to me that you're totally willing to see some potentially abusive white guy, but will out and out refuse to accept me sight unseen.

Is it that the younger black men are disrespectful?  Or IS it just a race thing.  An even better question is how do I fight this?  I'm not one to beg someone to accept my money, so I usually just move on.  But it severely limits my options.

To their credit the professional providers I've met on this forum have never had an issue.  It's never come up and when I see them it's never even mentioned.

Thanks for your time!  This has been eating at me for awhile.

1.  Most BP ads that state that policy are rip offs.  For some strange reason they think it's safer to rob white guys.  I guess it works.

2.  I have encountered maybe (LEGIT) 3 providers over the years that don't see Black guys.  Not enough to worry about.

3.  Send an email to a legit/TER provider and ask if they take dates with Black guys.  99% of the time the answer will be yes.

Here's some nice music to enjoy!!!!

As RT stated this is mainly an issue with BP providers. How many of them do it because they intend to rip off the client, I don't know. What I do know is from the BP providers I've seen who include that disclaimer. My most recent regular is such a girl ("no AA please") even though her boyfriend is a young black man. I asked her about this and she said she's worried about running into someone who knows her boyfriend. The issue isn't being recognized (she has her face displayed on all her ads after all), rather she doesn't want the potential drama from having one of her boyfriend's buddies claim that he slept with her. The logic isn't airtight, but that's her reasoning (assuming she was being honest with me, of course). She's never ripped me off, btw.

Also, one of the first providers I saw was a black woman who also had the same restriction. I didn't ask her about it, but she brought it up in conversation anyway. She said she will see black men (though she advertises otherwise), but only of a certain age. According to her, young black men are always trying to haggle with her about prices, trying to slip off the cover during intercourse, or are verbally abusive at the end of the session by hurling threats at her that if shes tells anyone about him he'll have his boys pay her a visit (this is what she told me).  

As RT said, this is mainly a BP provider issue so I doubt you'll get many helpful responses from "upscale" providers here with any real insight. I'm sure that racism is  part of the answer, just as the desire to rip people off, but overall I'd say there are as many different reasons as there are women who advertise they don't see black men.

Id' hate to be you though. I'm still going to BP because the local "upscale" providers have been wasting my time by stringing me along all the way up to the day of the date when they suddenly disappear. I've lost all confidence in them and I'm not even trying to set anything up with them anymore. So BP is all I have left (until I decide I'm in the mood to get stood up at the last minute again). If I were black and I couldn't even get a date with BP providers . . .

Thanks, I never thought about the boyfriend angle.  It's funny because if you look up some of their numbers on facebook you'll find the girl and her black boyfriend.

BP to me supplements my visits to the upscale ladies since their schedule might not mesh with mine all of the time.  Not all ads are ripoffs.  You learn to filter them by their visual and text clues.  It's an interesting skill you develop, reading between the lines. :)

YoMaMaDo301 reads

Another angle is that of competition. Several who respond to BP ladies are doing so to rip them off or turn them. Increasing one's string , if you will is what that is all about. Many times it is not the Lady's rule but that of her "Manager".  

Ladies that provide typically only see one color. Some do have some BS crap in their heads to be sure but in most cases they are being directed to see no men of color.

Epsilon_Eridani503 reads

it's a society thing.

do a word association with a lot of people... it would go like this:

pimp = young black thug
drug dealer = young black thug
gangster = young black thug
sex trafficker = young black thug

are you getting the picture here? it's 'guilty by association' when it comes to race perception.  

does it mean it's right? no!  

all it means that's it the reality of the situation that you see not only in backpage, but in other related businesses.

I'm happy that you are an upstanding black professional, but until the "young black thugs", who are ruining things for the nice black guys like yourself, are transformed into nice young black professionals, you will run into these types of perceptions. right or wrong.  

take a guess where the transformation starts. it starts in those neighborhoods where those young black thugs are plying their trade (whatever that might be) stand up and change things around.

until that happens... not much is going to change.  
Look at Ferguson, Baltimore, and NYC as examples.
 

Posted By: argentx
OK, I'm sure this has been brought up before.  The tide seems to ebb and flow, but right now a lot of the BP ads I see have embedded somewhere in them "No Black Men", or worse: "No Black Men Sorry".  Like the "Sorry" makes it all better.  
   
 I'm a 50 year-old black professional.  Grounded, financially stable, and completely comfortable with who I am.  I'm just out here looking for an engaging evening. I'm no different than the white guy next door in the same situation.  
   
 Ladies, what's the reason for this automatic rejection of part of the audience?  It's frustrating to me that you're totally willing to see some potentially abusive white guy, but will out and out refuse to accept me sight unseen.  
   
 Is it that the younger black men are disrespectful?  Or IS it just a race thing.  An even better question is how do I fight this?  I'm not one to beg someone to accept my money, so I usually just move on.  But it severely limits my options.  
   
 To their credit the professional providers I've met on this forum have never had an issue.  It's never come up and when I see them it's never even mentioned.  
   
 Thanks for your time!  This has been eating at me for awhile.

Oh I don't know like walk into a place of worship and kill innocent people.  

Yep, only people doing bad things are those mean old Black guys.

I feel so sorry that young White thugs are ruining it for upstanding White guys like yourself.

Here's some nice music to enjoy......

Epsilon_Eridani487 reads

... which is your modus operandi.

I never said white thugs are upstanding citizens of the world.

I never used the word 'old' in the post. I used 'young'.

ridgy... RE-READ the fuckin' post again!  

Posted By: Ridgetucky
Re: No White Guy Ever Did Anything Bad EVER... Oh I don't know like walk into a place of worship and kill innocent people.    
   
 Yep, only people doing bad things are those mean old Black guys.  
   
 I feel so sorry that young White thugs are ruining it for upstanding White guys like yourself.  
   
 Here's some nice music to enjoy......

cbusgent497 reads

Swinging? If you are a good looking, in shape black man, you will have your pick of white women, for free. Just have to be a gentleman and be ok with couples. Not that you have to be bi, you just can't be homophobic.
But from your original post/question, sometimes the few can ruin it for the masses. But maybe sometimes Black Guys are stereotyped in wanting the PSA experience?
And I wouldn't look at BP for any girl, black, white, red or green.
But go for the highly rated, more expensive providers. 99% of them will meet you

I've heard of girls discriminating based on age or weight but not on race....so sorry that you have encountered that!  

Unfortunately, I think EE is probably right that some people are caught up in racial stereotypes and there are some things (sadly) about AA culture (I'm thinking music and videos) that are working to perpetuate these stereotypes.

I do think part of the problem is the fact that you are using BP. Girls there do not typically screen the way others do. I would have to cop to eliminating guys based on their verbiage.....a guy who has terrible spelling and grammar or talks like "a thug"- black, white, pink or blue- will probably get eliminated. I have turned down white guys for telling me they will "do what they want" to me, or similar statements. As a small girl (or really any girl) those type of comments make me very uncomfortable!

As for swinging, that is an idea, but also a great way to get caught up in some nasty drama or, at the least, some uncomfortable situations.

A customer of mine tried this and was "set-up" by the couple. He is a "youngish," highly educated, professional black male. He responded to an add placed by a swinging couple. The wife told him to come over to their house at midnight. She was going to leave the door open and he was to come in and "do" her in their living room. He followed their directions and (as he told it to me) just as they were "getting into it," the husband came screaming out of their bedroom brandishing a gun....holy shit!!!
It turned out that her fantasy was to be "raped" by a black man and "saved" by her husband....OMG!!! Needless to say, my friend was a bit traumatized by the whole thing and swore off swingers!  
Obviously, that is a worst-case scenario but one that actually happened so I would caution you to screen any couples very carefully. I would even meet them for a casual drink or meal (and nothing more) first.....not saying you won't meet psychopaths but, hopefully, less likely.

I guess, even though I may not have a lot of personal insight, I would say consider going for maturity and quality over quantity. Hope that helps a little :-

Don_Juan__492 reads

One high end pro said no AAs because they had always treated her roughly.  She went so far as to call them animals, only interested in making their mark on her physically.

Another mentioned that AAs are more likely to have Aids and Herpes.  I looked that up and apparently it is true.   Can't fault them for that.

Posted By: argentx
OK, I'm sure this has been brought up before.  The tide seems to ebb and flow, but right now a lot of the BP ads I see have embedded somewhere in them "No Black Men", or worse: "No Black Men Sorry".  Like the "Sorry" makes it all better.  
   
 I'm a 50 year-old black professional.  Grounded, financially stable, and completely comfortable with who I am.  I'm just out here looking for an engaging evening. I'm no different than the white guy next door in the same situation.  
   
 Ladies, what's the reason for this automatic rejection of part of the audience?  It's frustrating to me that you're totally willing to see some potentially abusive white guy, but will out and out refuse to accept me sight unseen.  
   
 Is it that the younger black men are disrespectful?  Or IS it just a race thing.  An even better question is how do I fight this?  I'm not one to beg someone to accept my money, so I usually just move on.  But it severely limits my options.  
   
 To their credit the professional providers I've met on this forum have never had an issue.  It's never come up and when I see them it's never even mentioned.  
   
 Thanks for your time!  This has been eating at me for awhile.
I don't know about you, but I am absolutely not at all attracted to BBW's.  It sucks for me because I have a fairly narrow range of the female physique that I find attractive..... you could not believe some of the very, very nasty emails I would get from BBW's slamming me because I had the audacity to be honest in my dating profile articulating that I am attracted to women who are physically fit and petite.  I take my fitness level seriously and am in fairly good physical condition.   Its as though I have NO RIGHT to be attracted to what I am attracted too... I suspect a fair number of women are simply not attracted to black men... FWIW

I honestly think part of it is that younger black men have ruined it for a LOT of providers particularly the higher end market.  Some of it is is a lack of attraction.  It is rare for me as a Caucasian male to see an black girl that I perceive as attractive in my eyes and it has nothing to do with skin color

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