We've both talked about each other's SO with each other and know where both our situations stand. Both of us could use someone else in our lives. Now that being said, isn't doing what all of us are doing the same with SO's? What difference if feelings get involved? Getting caught either way would be just as bad.
I did a lot of research before I picked out my provider. I am a very picky individual and I found someone that really appealed to me. She has very, very good reviews and every reviewer says that they would or have seen her more than once. I have now seen her a few times. My questions are: What can be expected of the talk that goes on? My provider was very shocked, in a good way, when I entered. She said that she definately didn't expect anyone like me. Okay, so far so good. The first date was GREAT. So were the others that followed. We really seem to have connected quite well. She told me during our last meeting that she hasn't had feelings like this in years. She has invited me to lunch, on her. She says she wants to spoil me. She has asked me to go to a show with her, on her. Our time together goes WAY over the time I pay for and the price is discounted. She also said that she loves me. I don't know what to believe. Neither one of us are spring chickens. Is this normal talk between a provider and a client? Is this said just to get me to be a repeat client? She seems truthful but she's been in the game a lot longer than I have. Any suggestions? Thanks for the help.
and I wouldn't quite know what to believe either.
I do know that I'd be concerned unless I was so head over heals with her that I'd come to an understanding that we are a couple now, not just a client and a provider. From there on, you have to consult the Book of Love.
If that is not the kind of relationship you want however, then it may be time to move on before someone ends up very hurt.
And, despite what the bard says, parting is not always sweet sorrow.
Good luck with this. I think you are going to need it.
Wow! You've probably found something very rare. Im also quite new to hobbying but i can tell you not a lot of johns get this treatment only after one meeting! Her actions speak for themselves. If you like her back, then why not? Haha
Thanks for chiming in. I was hoping that a few providers would add what they thought also. I do feel pretty lucky and she is beautiful. We get along great. I forgot to mention that we both have SO's but it doesn't seem to bother her. I feel like we could spend hours just talking. I guess so far I'll just go with the flow and see how everything plays out. mrfisher I'm going to wait for a couple more meetings before I mention your answer. Thanks.
Had you not forgotten to mention that one minor detail, both of you having a SO, I believe the responses would have been different.
Knowing this fact now, I personally think you're playing with fire. But that's just my take on the situation.
My answer is MUCH different now than it would have been if I had not just read about the SO factor.
Using the "L" word when already in a committed relationship is definitely playing with fire, and I don't see any of the parties not getting burned.
If you were both "available" I would have given a much different answer as I have had several LTR's with women I have met as Hooker/John at first, and quickly evolved into to something more.
Maybe I am old fashioned, but I don't really believe anyone who tells me they "love me" but is already in a committed relationship with someone else. Either she is in love with both of us, or she is lying to at least one of us, most likely both. Just not my cup of tea. Fucking is a lot different than "loving"
We've both talked about each other's SO with each other and know where both our situations stand. Both of us could use someone else in our lives. Now that being said, isn't doing what all of us are doing the same with SO's? What difference if feelings get involved? Getting caught either way would be just as bad.
If you're wanting validation of your situation, it won't come from me.
I don't have a SO to worry about. The moment I enter into a committed, monogamous relationship then this world ceases to exist. I'm either 100% committed to someone else, or I'm not. Maybe that's old fashioned to some, but that's just how I choose to do things.
but IMO, for whatever it is worth. Fucking hookers is what guys to "instead" of having an affair and for lack of a better word is a more honest and less complicated form of "cheating"
When you get feelings involved, especially if you are tossing the "L" word around, I frankly don't see anyway this doesn't end up VERY complicated with some if not all of the parties getting burned.
Or maybe I just take the use of the "L" word more seriously than you. and for the record, I don't mean to come off as being judgmental, I don't expect you to follow anyone else's moral code but your own. It's just in my experience, love is MUCH more complicated than simply having sex. I can fuck a girl and not even remember her name by dinnertime, I can't say the same about a woman I love, or have loved. Two very different things in my book, but like I said, we may be reading two very different books. lol
No, we probably are reading the same book. It just came as a shock to me. Also, before this, I haven't "stepped out" in over 30 years.
Hearing "I love you" from another woman could easily cause you to mix up your emotions and think you have something more than you actually do have or even want to have.
Of course it all depends on how important it is for you to stay married. Some guys are very cavalier about this type of thing because deep down they want to get caught, as by getting caught if forces them to deal with their situation at home. Other guys desperately do NOT want to get caught. They don't want to get divorced and have to start over again in life, and take every pain to ensure they don't get caught. I have no idea which camp you find yourself in. Only you can answer some of these questions.
I have a SO... & a sex-less marriage.
But if a client used the L word, many providers who refuse to see him. It is possible for people to fall in Love with others & it's generally messy.
As a much younger man, I fell for a married woman... I was single at the time... it was an accident. It became a messy open secret. I tried to break it off several times. Eventually I made it stick after wasting 5 years of my life when I should have been dating eligible women.
If you continue... you will be forever second guessing yourself & wondering where this is going... and your marriage... I can't tell you what to do but surely keep your eyes open.
I wish you luck... you are going to need it.
then I read about the part of her not being a spring chicken 
then later on it turned out BOTH of you have SOs.
Since you're already in the hobby and mongering I don't see what the danger is like some other people were saying. Well there's danger already with your mongering this is not going to make it that much worse!
So FORGET and IGNORE all the naysayers and doomsayers, just enjoy the ride!
That is unless you allow yourself to fall in love as well and thinking of drastic plan, such as leaving your SO.
Or, if she starts demanding/asking you to consider such.
So, as long as the two of you enjoying things the way they are and not thinking of taking it to another level just enjoy the ride I say again
I think she may be genuinely fond of you but proceed with caution and remember that she is an escort.