do not talk about their significant others during our time together.
Even if you ask if she is single, she can either answer honestly or not.... but there is no reason to start talking about a SO beyond that. To go on and on about it is stupid and crazy. You should have said something to her about wanting to enjoy the time between you two together. It wouldn't have been rude at all. You paid to feel like you were all that mattered, not to hear all the BS about the SO. It is about you, not him. It isn't even ok for her to do that down the line, during your play time. At some point, after seeing her awhile, if she wants to share a little because YOU asked.... she can, but not during your paid time!!! Sorry but I feel talk of a provider's SO is a huge no-no unless it is to mention it when a guy is trying to ask you out beyond P4P.... Yes, some girls say that they have a SO as a nice way of saying no to out of the Hobby dating, although some really do have a SO. I just say I am too busy and am not able to, because that is more of the honest answer because I am single. (and seriously my life is in fact too busy for dating with family, friends, and schooling). I don't even think I'd tell a guy in the hobby if I did have a SO, as it is easier and less questions.Hello,
I am brand new to this site. I have only had one provider so far. I used Backpage. She said she was GFE. The girl was talkative which was great. No awkward silence. I did a long session with the provider as I like to have that night out experience. I do have a question. Is it normal for a provider to talk about her boyfriend? I would say out of the entire night she spent at least 60% talking about her boyfriend and their relationship. Is this normal? I know this is just a paid session but I would think (I am new so maybe I am wrong) that other providers would not do so. I can understand if I asked or we hit it off as that type of session. However, I would believe that she should "at least for that session" make you think you are #1 for that time? I felt like telling her that "I know this is a fantasy type date. I know that you are not really my girlfriend so you do not need to keep telling me about your boyfriend. ". However, I know that would sound rude and I am not sure she was intending to be so. She has texted me and asked when can we meet again so I do not believe I created her out.
Please do not think I am being rude. Maybe what I thought being new is not the actual way this is done. I do not know which is why I am asking
but some gals have a very low sense of how they portray themselves will affect others and it's a shame in a way as they undercut themselves that way.
After a while, I usually get to know a favorite provider and then she will open up to me about her personal life, sometimes anyways. I enjoy that but I'm sure there are many more clients who are not amused by that.
As mrf mentioned it's not normal. Please write a review so the next client is aware of this behavior. I for one would prefer not to hear about the BF on the first meeting.
You might consider shopping on TER, you know there are regional ad boards.
I am brand new to this site. I have only had one provider so far. I used Backpage. She said she was GFE. The girl was talkative which was great. No awkward silence. I did a long session with the provider as I like to have that night out experience. I do have a question. Is it normal for a provider to talk about her boyfriend? I would say out of the entire night she spent at least 60% talking about her boyfriend and their relationship. Is this normal? I know this is just a paid session but I would think (I am new so maybe I am wrong) that other providers would not do so. I can understand if I asked or we hit it off as that type of session. However, I would believe that she should "at least for that session" make you think you are #1 for that time? I felt like telling her that "I know this is a fantasy type date. I know that you are not really my girlfriend so you do not need to keep telling me about your boyfriend. ". However, I know that would sound rude and I am not sure she was intending to be so. She has texted me and asked when can we meet again so I do not believe I created her out.
Please do not think I am being rude. Maybe what I thought being new is not the actual way this is done. I do not know which is why I am asking?
This is definitely out of the ordinary. I personally wont see a provider who mentions or hints at the fact that she may have a significant other.
Quality providers will try to keep their personal life separate from their hobby life. Besides, it's really none of our business anyway. If, after a few visits, she opens up to you, she feels comfortable with you. If I spent an extended amount of time with a provider, and most of her chatter was about her boyfriend, it would probably be the last time I'd see her. I am there for her to make me think I'm the only man in her life, I don't want to hear all about her real life boyfriend.
I hope you do a review, so other guys in your area will be aware of this gal. Suggest two things, one, read the self help center. Two, stick to well-reviewed providers with reviews done by established reviewers.
LLAP,
Swim
Thanks, KK.
LLAP,
Swim
...until we part company.
Hugs and Kisses,
Kelly
this provider? If so, was your experience similar to what others have said in reviews?
Oh, one other thing--this is not something you should ask a provider while out on a date. In fact, nothing should be said about RL situations. P4P is a fantasy and should remain separate from RL.
It's something that makes some feel uncomfortable and you had every right to ask her to stop. For a provider, this is not the way to keep a client, it seems like it would be a big turn off.
In fact, the OP DID NOT ask her to stop. He says that he considered doing so. I do agree that he had every right to say something but being new, and sounding like a polite guy, he refrained.
Regards.....RR
I understand trying to be gentle but if you don't like it, try changng the subject. If that doesn't work, I'd suggest gently saying "Could we talk about something else."
I've had it happen that the session was all about me... through the first pop. She got chatty & talked about her family while we rested. Didn't say much about a SO... but still...
I think they do it because they are nervious & just need a topic to talk about.
Regards.....RR
Hi Grimslade;
I believe you've received good advice from others but there's one point I'll add. In addition to informing other men about the behavior, a review would also be a way to let the woman know that you didn't appreciate all the talk of her boyfriend. If she cares, and she may or may not, she'll take the advice as well-meaning and put it to use in making herself a better hooker.
Regards......RR
do not talk about their significant others during our time together.
Even if you ask if she is single, she can either answer honestly or not.... but there is no reason to start talking about a SO beyond that. To go on and on about it is stupid and crazy. You should have said something to her about wanting to enjoy the time between you two together. It wouldn't have been rude at all. You paid to feel like you were all that mattered, not to hear all the BS about the SO. It is about you, not him. It isn't even ok for her to do that down the line, during your play time. At some point, after seeing her awhile, if she wants to share a little because YOU asked.... she can, but not during your paid time!!!
Sorry but I feel talk of a provider's SO is a huge no-no unless it is to mention it when a guy is trying to ask you out beyond P4P.... Yes, some girls say that they have a SO as a nice way of saying no to out of the Hobby dating, although some really do have a SO. I just say I am too busy and am not able to, because that is more of the honest answer because I am single. (and seriously my life is in fact too busy for dating with family, friends, and schooling). I don't even think I'd tell a guy in the hobby if I did have a SO, as it is easier and less questions.
+1 @AlexandraMilw I completely agree..common sense is key!
Even if you ask if she is single, she can either answer honestly or not.... but there is no reason to start talking about a SO beyond that. To go on and on about it is stupid and crazy. You should have said something to her about wanting to enjoy the time between you two together. It wouldn't have been rude at all. You paid to feel like you were all that mattered, not to hear all the BS about the SO. It is about you, not him. It isn't even ok for her to do that down the line, during your play time. At some point, after seeing her awhile, if she wants to share a little because YOU asked.... she can, but not during your paid time!!!
Sorry but I feel talk of a provider's SO is a huge no-no unless it is to mention it when a guy is trying to ask you out beyond P4P.... Yes, some girls say that they have a SO as a nice way of saying no to out of the Hobby dating, although some really do have a SO. I just say I am too busy and am not able to, because that is more of the honest answer because I am single. (and seriously my life is in fact too busy for dating with family, friends, and schooling). I don't even think I'd tell a guy in the hobby if I did have a SO, as it is easier and less questions.
After looking in more detail I noticed she has some reviews. I used wrong name listed in TER. Almost all of the reviews are good. I think she may have had a bad night. I do not think she was intentionally or maybe aware of how much she is saying it. i have issues with conflict. In fact at work I do my damnedest to not write up or report bad performance. As long as I see the person really trying I like to protect them. I will talk to them personally but do not like to report. I feel the same here. I really believe that she was trying her best. I do sales and contract negotiations so I can usually tell when people try to pretend or BS.
Most of her talking were about some of the issues she had. She also said her and her boyfriend liked the places I wanted to visit for our night out. I am shy and quiet when I first meet people and let them talk. Thus has helped me in the sales an negation end of my work life. Maybe I made her nervous. Again all her reviews said she was great. I really think it may have been a bad night. It did affect when we tried to have "fun" as I kept thinking I was here to pay for her date with her boyfriend she had after our session. As a result there was no goal celabrating.
If she were openly rude I would write the bad review. When I read these women are usually good I do not want to put a blemish on a normally good record. After it was just me it happend to. Tend to be accustomed to be treated that way which interesting enough is why I came here to "hobby". These women have enough hard time getting any respect in our society I do not want to bring someone down that from the reviews normally does a good job. I think it is our job to help show these women the respect the rest of "open minded society" seems to withhold from them.
Sorry if this is TMI but I wanted you all that were offering help know why I am not doing a bad review or share her name.
As I said I am a newbie so this is all new to me. Thanks to anyone that responded and to everyone that may respond later.
I NEVER share my personal life with a client for several reasons:
1). You just don't know who you are seeing
2). If you share all your information, the client would conclude that I probably would share information about him as well.
3). The client visits because it is a wonderful escape. It is polite to ask a client if they like to chat a little. If yes, chat a little.....that's it.
4). I screen well, so I find the clients that visit me are interesting. I may ask a little information about HIM, but just a bit.
Be well my Dears !!