Thank you too! I'm glad we had a meeting of the minds. I appreciated your candid comments. It helped me a lot, believe me.
All the best to you!I've seen this one sp a few times and have really struck a chord with her such that we both look forward to seeing each other whenever she's in town. It's always a great time when we're together and our dates have gone from 2 hours to an evening out. I feel we've established a real connection and was ready to perhaps take things to the next level and spend an overnight with her sometime soon. As I was surfing the net one night, I come across a familiar photo.. wait, I've seen that one before. Then, on another occasion I find another one. Both photos had been lifted from cover models' or third party websites and used to represent the sp on a couple of past Twitter posts of hers. Each photo used had either the model's face turned or head cropped. I'm not naive enough to think this doesn't ever happen, but I didn't think it was in this sp's character to do such a thing. Yes it's unethical, dishonest and wrong and I was shocked, but disappointed is how I really feel - like I've been duped to think that was her in the photos and that I was with someone who represented herself as genuine. Though I still have a soft spot for this sp given our past experiences, I'm not sure whether I'd continue seeing her as I'll always have this in the back of my mind. Suffice to say, I'd never put her in a position to come clean. To say the least, I am torn.
Did she use the hacked pic to attract you initially? If you've seen her several times you must know whether she's the one in the picture. Not being judgmental, just curious.
No she didn't. We had been seeing each other over the course of a few months before I caught on them. The likeness on the photos could well be her in terms of height, skin tone and general form. She does have some ink, but I know it's common for these to be photoshopped out to preserve anonymity.
You've met her. Who cares what photos she uses to attract other business.... you know what she looks like.
Are you fixating on the false advertising? If so why?
What's your hang up?
Ever heard the expression, help Ive fallen for a provider and can't get up. Remember the hobby is NSA, so if the situation is bothering you, walk away. I've been with providers who used pics that weren't t them, but it was a resemblance of them. Never really bothered me, especially if I had a good time. But that's just me.
and some gals and even guys defended the practice on the grounds of no harm, no foul, as long as the model in question closely resembled the provider in question.
I'm more dubious about it, but on the other hand, on a one to ten scale I think that only rises to about a five, so if other considerations offset that enough, I would still see the lady.
But we all have our particular hot buttons and if this breach of ethics turns you off, then by all means seek someone else. Just to bad that otherwise she seemed to be an ideal fit for you.
Now, don't get me started on gals who squeeze the toothpaste tube in the middle. (You know who you are! 8o)
Looked for that discussion you mentioned but couldn't find it. Went as far as the past 10 threads to January. Can you point it out? Otherwise, thank you for your balanced input as always.
Here it is:
Some varied and insightful comments. The comment about her being real in person and the performance that makes the difference (I paraphrase) is sound perspective. At the end of the day, who am I to judge an sp and what her motive is in using fake photos I suppose. Giving her the benefit of the doubt is starting to tip the scale.
Thanks for this.
by using someone else's pics, then the obvious thing to do is move on. Just because you feel you 'established a connection', you are under no obligation to see her again. However, if you think you can overlook this deception, by all means, see her again. You are the only one who can make this decision. In your post, you really didn't ask for advice, although I think that was the basic purpose of your post. Now you have some, but the decision is yours.
LLAP,
Swim
I've thought about this for a while before submitting my post. I knew (know) it was/is ultimately my decision to see her again or not and I suppose the purpose of my post was to let my thoughts out.. and fish for opinions. Sitting on the fence about something like this isn't easy, especially when it involves something (someone) you truly enjoy. Sometimes perspective and some common advice can help though make one's mind up.
You should know what she looks like, if you are pleased with the level of service you get what difference does it make to you what pics she uses in her ads.
attracted to her and like her level of service. Why be concerned with photos that "look like her" or may be her?
Like Tineye or Google image? It you didn't properly research before booking (and experienced hobbiests always do) then it's on you. I won't book with a gal who uses false pictures, just on principals. I suggest you do the same.
As mentioned, I found the fake photos only on her Twitter account and after I had already seen her a number of times. Photos on her website and ads otherwise look legitimate. I am relatively new to the hobby, hence my post here. Based on your and others' feedback and experience, I'm much the wiser now. Thanks.
If so and you saw no reason previous to your discovery to think she was misrepresenting herself, why the outrage? Some women do use other images that are very representative of themselves, so much so, you could not tell until you saw them elsewhere.
Another point...she is a hooker like the rest of us with a FAKE name. A lot of this world is make believe or fake, so getting your undies in a bunch because she is doing what most of us do, as in not tell the tricks who we really are (you did not mention whether she has reveled her true identity to you) or use images ( I don't but I make darn sure you can't tell it's me if someone that knows me sees them) that are very representative.
Seems like you have fallen and oh dear, she lied to me. Listen up, she might be lying with most of the shit she says and does. News flash, some hookers are very good at the illusion and can make you think and feel things are very real. Try stopping the fee you give her and see how real she is then.
-- Modified on 3/30/2015 1:53:40 PM
Thanks for your input.
Your 1st point: Not outraged; as I've said, mainly disappointed basically coz of general principal. But, as I navigate through these uncharted waters of hobbying I'm learning to accept some facts.
Your 2nd point: Valid one, that's one way to think about it. But 99.9% of us know that the use of fake names and/or identities is commonplace to preserve privacy - kinda like an unwritten code or rule of thumb. I took represented photos to be real at face value - again, lesson learned. Notwithstanding, using someone else's photos to essentially market yourself is still wrong and because everyone else does it, doesn't make it right. Maybe it's something not worth getting one's undies in a bind for some, but the same can be said about say, plagiarism? Both are an infringement upon the owners and shouldn't be condoned IMHO.
Your last comment: "... some hookers are very good at the illusion and make you think and feel things are very real." Likely so, but I guess the key word to take from this is "SOME" as I don't think ALL of them fake it to this degree, nor do I believe all are insincere or dishonest. I seek companionship to find genuine and meaningful connections with companions who purport to be looking for the same thing in the men they choose to see. Sure, "Genuine" and "Meaningful" can have different interpretations but I'd like to believe there's some truth in their claim and something inherently real in who they make themselves out to be rather than to become jaded with the notion that it's ALL smoke and mirrors. To get to this level of mutual understanding and appreciation, trust is required - and that goes both ways. As relationships go (whether conventional or GFE), it takes time to sort out who you find you're most compatible with, to gain that trust and forge a real connection - and that's what I'm ultimately looking for in this hobby.
Jaded or just realistic, listen if you found a hooker that is really into you as much as you are really into her then wonderful, HOWEVER if you are 60 and you are choosing 24 year olds and you are not in great shape and she is a knockout, then I am going to call bull crap on her wanting you as much as you want her. That "wanting" on her part is accompanied by a fat envelop. Take that way and she leaves the building.
If you are choosing hookers close to your own age then I can see more of a connection that just might surpass the money, but again, try not paying and see how real this "connection" is.
Example, I have a guy who raves about our connection. He truly believes I enjoy him as much as he enjoys me. I don't. He is unattractive, and nothing like I would date in real life. I do a great job at this GF experience so he feels that way. art of what I am being paid for. Listen he is a sweet guy, very gentle and respectful and clean. That is all I ask for so if that is my portion of the connection so be it, but that is all it is. And our conversations are genuine and sometimes very meaningful. The sex, not so much.
On another note, if the images she used are royalty free, then she is clear. So do you feel if a woman blurs her face or removes identifying tattoos she is misrepresenting herself too?
I get and fully appreciate the concept of the GFE --> it's an "Experience", a service that's paid for and sure, there can be an art of deception (of varying degrees) on the part of the provider depending on the client and his appearance among other things. I'm not oblivious to that. I only point out what I'm looking for, and I do believe it's out there if you align yourself with who you feel you're best compatible with.
I do my homework. I date providers who prefer mature, 30+ gents and whose general body type is close to mine so I don't look like Elmer Fudd with Jessica Rabbit (not saying I look like EF). FYI, I am 51 but have been mistaken for 35. I have that kind of genetics I guess. Age is relative anyway. I'm no Brad Pitt, but I'm modest enough to say that I'm fit, not unattractive and am confident in myself and who I am which trumps good looks IMO (at least, that's what I find attractive in women). From the few sp's I've seen, I've "connected" with a couple of them such that we keep in touch on an ongoing basis and "genuinely" enjoy talking to each other off the clock. Whether it's a ploy on their part to perhaps sustain business with me, who knows for sure. I can only trust my intuition and ability to read people in how genuine they are in their words and actions. And the sex? Naturally, it's great for me, but I'd sound like a narcissist if I said it was good for them too. I only hope they have as much fun as I do when I'm with them and I do try my best to make the experience mutually enjoyable.
It seems we've gone on a bit on a tangent from what originally bugged me. To come full circle, I have difficulty accepting that it's ok to use someone else's photos to represent one's self anywhere, royalty free or not. In the case of my sp, the fact that she did (and I found out) goes against the grain of what I seek in this hobby because it automatically makes me think that she's disingenuous and that puts my guard up. I'm a naturally open and accepting person but when I see a red flag, I get turned off and close off. However, as I've mentioned in a previous thread to answer someone else's comment, I haven't discounted the fact that this sp has been "real" with me in person and I'm prepared to give her the benefit of the doubt rather than second guess her motive behind the photo misuse. So, I'll proceed with a cautionary yellow flag instead with this sp and let things play out.
Again, thanks for sharing.
I do wish you well and if you feel you have a connection then go with it and enjoy it. I tend to be blunt and it may not bode well some of the time and I seriously do feel that in a small percentage of cases, there is some genuine attraction and affection.
In my experience I have never felt that. What I have felt was a connection on a cerebral level and have thoroughly enjoyed the conversation between myself and a couple of favorites, so I guess the connection can come in a myriad of forms, and even though this business is based mainly on sex, there are times when that is not the reason for the connection and that is okay in my book.
Have fun, stay safe.
Thank you too! I'm glad we had a meeting of the minds. I appreciated your candid comments. It helped me a lot, believe me.
All the best to you!