My girl never fakes if she's fully inflated and has fresh batteries. I just turn on her volume control and every 10 seconds she screams; "fuck me harder you bastard" until I mute her when I'm done.
Some ladies (I don't know what percentage) become aroused with their clients and may achieve orgasm. Other ladies seem to fake sexual arousal. As a client, I appreciate a lady who actually becomes aroused, but I do NOT expect it. Nor do I want a lady to fake it. If I detect faking (and it isn't that hard to detect), the faking actually DETRACTS from an experience.
Ladies, any insights into this? Do you need to pretend because clients demand/expect it? Are they easily fooled? Reading reviews, a few of the clients do seem like egotistical idiots, completely clueless.
Guys, do you prefer a lady who fakes it, or just a friendly lady with an earnest desire to please? Is a lady's arousal (real or faked) necessary for your enjoyment?
Finally, is there a way for a client to let the lady know he doesn't need/want any response frome her that isn't real? (Note: I'm not talking about role playing, an entirely different thing.)
OK. Just curious. Thanks for all responses.
Singleguy, there are a couple of different scenarios for me at least. The best being ones where the attraction is mutual. There is no reason to fake anything. There are those clients who are well endowed and figured that was all they needed. These are the worst, for me at least. Most guys with a large package think that I'll get wet and excited and have an orgasm while they lay there not moving. Very, very sad. The last one, the one that requires faking are the nice guys that you don't find attractive, but you know they are there to feel better about themselves. Singleguy, how would you feel if your wife never made love to you? For these gentlemen, you do fake it. My advice to you, if you think she's faking it, find out what you are doing wrong.
My girl never fakes if she's fully inflated and has fresh batteries. I just turn on her volume control and every 10 seconds she screams; "fuck me harder you bastard" until I mute her when I'm done.
I'm always finished before I can even check if she's aroused.
Faking it is an abomination to the marriage. She needs her head examined and you need counseling too for allowing the ruse to go on. As far as providers faking it, you really can't expect much when you are renting. As for those encounters that produce big O's for both, they are rare, but they happen. Something called chemistry or so I hear.
I don't like fake arousal, and I tell the providers not to fake it for me. I am afraid that I am selfish, and my basic desire is that I be aroused and that we don't get sidetracked by her arousal. When it comes to arousal, my only desire is with my wife.
That said, there are times, rare though they may be, when I either want to arouse a provider, which I almost never can do, or when she is aroused naturally. Given that I have been at this hobby for more than 20 years, that is a truly unusual occasion.
Most men want to make the woman cum. Even the misogynists. No one wants to feel inadequate in bed. We all want to feel like we are the best, or at least good, in bed.
Some of us also have a genuine desire to please and give pleasure.
Whatever the reason, the woman cumming, or appearing to cum is often the catalyst that pushes the man over the edge. So, with many clients the provider has to fake it to enhance his good time.
And I doubt any amount of "please don't fake it with me" would have much effect. No matter how many times you see a girl and how honest you feel you two can be, she knows that if she makes you feel inadequate by not cumming, you might not be back.
I know, there are perfectly good reasons someone might not cum during sex that have nothing to to with how adequate their partner is, but what's that got to do with the psychology of it?
Personally, I would rather she have a real orgasm than a fake one, and I wouldn't mind being told to do something different if that will make the difference. Part of my good time really is her having a good time. But no one wants to hear "Honey, you are sweet to try, but I've already had sex 5 times today. I am a little tired and a little sore and it's just not going to happen this time." So, if there is nothing that I can do to make her cum, I guess I'd probably prefer that she fake it.
Just being honest.
However, ladies, please take note. If you see me, I really would rather make you cum than have you fake it, so feel free to do whatever you need, or ask me to do whatever you need. I am happy to switch positions, switch to DATY, use your favorite toy, or whatever. I want to make you cum, and am not picky about how.
-- Modified on 6/28/2005 5:18:36 AM
They all fake it? Well, I guess I am special, then, because several of the providers I have been with did not achieve orgasm while we were together. Maybe it was my genuine communication with them prior to our meeting, or maybe they just weren't "fakers", but these women didn't fake for my ego, and I didn't need them to.
I am always surprised if a provider has an orgasm with me. In my personal life, even I have often struggled the first time I slept with someone, usually because of the emotions and thoughts that I had for the person. As such, I have done away with expecting ANY woman to have an orgasm with me the first time we have sex, and I have extended this to providers. I mean, they don't know you and there isn't an emotional attachment, right?
Luckily, I have met some extraordinary providers, and they have achieved orgasm when we have been together, and there has been no doubt in my mind, either because of our communication, or because the things they did were so above and beyond what it would have taken to satisfy someone's ego that there was no possibility it was exaggerated.
To quote once again a wise friend of mine, "Communication = the response you get".
It's "not" normal nor should it be expected for a provider to have an orgasm with a hobbyist the first time. I think communication that puts them more at ease will go a long way in making the experience better for them also but to expect more than that is not realistic. Its great if it happens but if you're expecting some magical chemistry to develop when visiting a provider the 1st time within an hour, you're kidding yourself.
As I said, even though they all fake it, they don't fake it all the time. Sometimes they to have orgasms, and sometimes they don't and let you know it.
But I would be surprised if there was a single provider out there who didn't fake it with some of her clients.
Like you said, fake orgasms and fake moaning are bullshit, and distracting as well. The object is to pleasure me, and in return I will be very nice and gladly pay for that pleasure. If a provider TRULY wants to have an orgasm with me (and trust me, they don't), she can pay me! This is an exchange - sex for money - and nothing more. Even if you develop a very good and long-lasting relationship (friendship) with a provider, the odds greatly favor that you will never turn her on. I've gone that route, and at least the 3 gals I became close with were honest enough to never attempt to fake anything, which actually helped the relationships.
are the ones with the "Hey, I'm the one who's paying, so just do me, and do it well!" attitudes
Are we talking about fake arousal, or fake orgasm?
I think the big O is difficult to achieve with a provider.
I would like to read responses from ladies about arousal. A certain amount of faking needs to go on, otherwise there is a big disconnect with her grinding away as she yawns in boredom.
Which reminds me of a scene I once saw on a police type show: He was banging a prostitute in the mish position, and she was making all the right sounds. As the camera pulled away, you could see the lady concentrating on filing her nails.
But, can a guy tell if the lady is aroused? If she gets all wet and does not need any lubrication for covered FS, is that a sign that she is aroused? Are there other hard to fake signs?
if you're covered and the bed sheets have puddles the chances are good you aroused her
This probably falls into the realm of faking it, but I'll let you decide.
When my partner is doing all the right things, or the close-enough-for-government-work things, and I'm not experiencing a build up to orgasm, or even significant arousal I "exaggerate". I won't claim an orgasm I don't have, although if he/she assumes one I won't disabuse them of the notion. Mostly, I just try to get across the idea that I'm having a good time, even if I know it's not going anywhere for me.
If my partner is doing something I don't care for (aside from hurting me, I'll stop that), or doing something that just isn't on my arousal map at all, I won't pretend that it's doing anything for me. Sometimes they notice and stop on their own, sometimes they're so into their special technique they never notice that I'm not into it.
I rarely suggest changes that might improve my experience, because that's generally a self-defeating act. I become so self conscious about "is he doing it right now" that whatever mindset and relaxation I need to get off is out the window. There have been a very few long term partners that have healthy enough egos that I took their request for education on my body seriously. Most times to our mutual enjoyment.
For all of you who think you really can tell if a woman gets off, if she's any good at faking it, you will never know. A few discreet rubs across the chest produces a pink flush, a moment or two of holding your breath and pushing produces a pink face, glistening eyes, shortness of breath, and increased heart rate, vaginal contractions are easily accomplished at the .8 seconds tempo, a judicious application of a natural oil (almond and grapeseed are my favorites) to the vagina gives hours of moistness without compromising condoms, and, of course, all of this can be complimented by a personal accompaniment of noises and spasms.
I'm genuinely sorry if this bursts anyone's bubble, but it's the truth.
The male ego makes it difficult to say "that hurts" or "that is uncomfortable" or "that is doing nothing for me". Some men think that jamming their fingers into a woman's vagina is a great way to help a lady reach orgasm. While it *can* be, if done correctly, often times it's not. It's actually a bit painful. Putting a finger in a woman's anus without lubrication and then twisting it around...um, not a turn-on.
Unfortunately many men watch porn for sex education, but most of what goes on in porn is for the sake of porn and for getting the man off. Even if that means, at best, discomfort for the woman.
In any case...chemistry is a big part of it. Also, when a man has some type of hygeine issue, it's a HUGE turn-off. For a woman, a man that is pleasant to her senses and sensitive to her body is a turn-on. If a woman tells you that something feels good, the idea is to keep doing what you're doing and don't do it harder or softer or faster, as many men tend to do.
Every woman has different levels of personal lubrication. Even if she is turned on, she might be dry as a bone. Could be just her body chemistry or a medication she is on, including some types of birth control.
My personal experience is that every man that I am intimate with has something to offer. If he tells me that he wants me to direct him, I will, otherwise, I won't. However, if something is painful I have a hard time not asking him to stop or gently removing his hand from the area in which he is inadvertently causing me pain.
I am not sure that this answers your question from a provider's point of view. You really cannot generalize your experience because everyone is different in their technique, communication style, and personality. Saying this, I suppose it's just a personal thing. I think there are very few women out that that can become aroused at the sight of, feel of, or taste of just any man.
Best,
Kate Bishop
There's a whole lot of physical reactions going on that are really difficult to fake. Eg;
1. the coloration flush on the chest.
2. the erection of the nipples.
3. abdominal and vaginal contraction.
4. primal thrust to take the deepest penetration.
5. glazing of eyes and pupil dilation.
6. back and pelvic convulsion.
7. increased vaginal lubrication and squirting.
8. tendency to retreat during resolution phase.
9. overly sensitive clitoris erection.
The only one that may be consciously faked are the vocalizations, and you ought to be able to tell the real ones from the fake.
The only one that I would add is the speed up intensity with whatever is working for the lady. I had one of the best CG rides recently where at first it seemed pretty routine until she took over as almost willing her O. She got off on me. I felt so used. LOL
it's very difficult for me to have a Orgasm
and i have only had one on rare occasions and it has never even been in my personal life and has always been with a client
that being said, I do get AROUSED pretty easily, well not EASILY, but if you go down on me, VERY VERY EASILY
lol
and i get so aroused that apparently i squirt or get very very wet and guys always say "wow, you came like 5 times"
and I'm like
"oh you think so huh?"
I don't actually say that
i don't really consider it FAKING it unless the guy says "CUM FOR ME" or "i'm going to make you cum" or "how can i make you cum?"
then i friggin fake a orgasm cause otherwise in my experience they get very dissapointed
-- Modified on 6/28/2005 11:40:21 PM
A bunch of different reasons, first of all if a provider doesn't make any noise the first thing you think is she is not responsive or doesn't like me. FS is suppose to be pleasureable so you can look at it as she is just doing her job. Or she may like you and find you very attractive but unfortunately you are her last appointment and its 10pm on the busiest day she has ever had so she just fakes it to get the day over with. Lets get real after years of FS and so many clients what the hell do you expect. I personally am there to enjoy myself I don't need my ego stroked. If the sex is good Ill be back, whether she screams or not. And with me the longer I hobby the more I like stimulating conversation along with FS sometimes a stimulating conversation can trigger a stimulating FS session triggering a big O all ladies want to be treated special I think in my case the arousal are for real due to how I treat the providers.
There is no reason for her to just lie there. She should be encouraging me on. I like the (sometimes fake)encouragement, not the fake orgasm.
Reading this thread just really makes me cringe because it shows a lot about what men do not understand about women. When I orgasm i do not yell, scream, cry out like a wild animal etc. really too many guys seem to be learning from porn these days.
When i really orgasm I may breath heavy and make sounds, but when this happens and i truly orgasm, guys don't believe it. So i think a lot of the guys out there are truly confused about when their girl is really orgasming and really faking it. When i fake it they believe it because i make a show of loud noises and quivers blah blah. It's very sad that i cannot enjoy a real orgasm because i know that it will not satisfy the man i am with because they all seem to think that when a girl orgasms that she will look like an exorcism is being performed.
And what is with the demands for me to provide you with as many of my own, faked orgasms within an hour period of time. Come on. We aren't machines. if you want real orgasms don't think i am going to be able to come for you 3-4 times in an hour and appear like the holy ghost has taken control of my body. If you want the real thing stop forcing girls to make it fake.
I think that most of the times i have actually had an orgasm during a session the guy doesn't even know it. too bad because it feels great to me. it makes me doubt that most guys really want us to have an orgasm, rather they want to see some kind of ridiculous porn star experience. I wish that guys could tell the difference between the PSE and a GFE.
And as someone above mentioned you cannot tell if a girl has had an orgasm from how wet she is. that varies a great deal and can be affected by medications. A girl getting wet is an autonomic respose just like a dick getting hard. A hard dick can be triggered by a lot of things besides horniness. Guys get hard ons throught the night while they are sleeping. girls can get wet when they aren't aroused or horny and they can be dry, but extremely horny. I'm not trying to put down the guys, but i am trying to tell you how it really is. Sometimes i get wet and I am completely repulsed, but it is just an autonomic body response to being touched. Sometimes i am dry and i come in .5 seconds b/c i am incredibly horny. I think the point is guys are confused so i hope this has helped you understand a little bit about women and orgasms.