Newbie - FAQ

Re: PM'd you. -e-
Atlastood 5 Reviews 437 reads
posted

I saw that after I sent the PM. No worries, I was just giving you some unsolicited opinions about your site. That aside I think you'll be just fine. You're not only seeking out advice, but you also seem willing to take it. If I may venture an educated guess I'd say that your price is a reflection of your business model and the clientele you're looking to cater to. On its own it's a screening process which weeds out customers you're not seeking. You're looking for higher-end clients who won't be dissuaded by such a high price. The trouble with entering the luxury market out of nowhere is that the customer worries that you might have a higher opinion of your service than they will. There's still a customer base for that, but it's an incredibly small one, thus limiting your access to this industry. You can, as others have suggested, lower your price initially to build a reputation that will, hopefully, be worthy of an eventual increase, or you can associate with a trusted and highly reviewed competitor who would be willing to lend her credibility to your services (I'm not suggesting this is an easy thing to do). SB/SD relationships and agencies are also options, but they might diverge from your goals too much.

Since I'm already taking up your time I might as well give you a synopsis of the PM I sent. I complimented your site (visuals, layout, structure, etc.), your writing, and your beauty. However, I also mentioned that there's a body language issue in the picture greeting visitors because it seems like you have pursed lips which signals a disapproving attitude (I suggested something more seductive, or perhaps a smile instead). I also commented on the fact that there was a resolution issue with the pics in your portfolio. I agree with others regarding the poses and "selfie" style, they seem genuinely seductive and inviting, but I think a higher resolution set would be better.

I continue to wish you all the best.

Hi everyone. New to TER, brand spanking new provider. I've been reading through the board discussions and I know this dilemma has been discussed before, but I would love to hear anecdotal experiences from ladies (and gents) who have btdt.

I'm wondering how a new provider overcomes the natural and understandable aversion clients have to trying a totally unknown quantity. I have a website, an ad on The Mall That Shall Not Be Named (or so I gather from reading posts here) and though I've had a couple of queries I've booked zero engagements. I'm also slightly terrified of reviews because of the nice little paper trail of evidence left behind should the worst happen, but also realize my stance against them is likely not going to add up to a fabulous business model.

Right now however, that seems like less of a concern since I've done nothing to be reviewed.  

Anyone care to share some great success stories about successful career launches?

Thanks and looking forward to participating in the discussions now that I've found my way here :)

Zangari681 reads

Posted By: BespokeMuse
 I'm wondering how a new provider overcomes the natural and understandable aversion clients have to trying a totally unknown quantity.
 You don't mention if you're on a screening site like P411 or DateCheck, but that would help.  It's safer for you and your potential clients.  I won't see a provider unless she's on P411--it doesn't matter how hot her pix are or what her reviews say.  
   
Posted By: BespokeMuse
I have a website..and though I've had a couple of queries I've booked zero engagements.  
 
 There may be a problem here.  If a guy takes the trouble to contact you, then you've got a fish on the hook (timewasters excluded).   I'm curious about how you're handling these queries. Going back to the previous point, joining a screening service will eliminate a lot of preliminary screening questions that will make a potential client uncomfortable.    
Posted By: BespokeMuse
I'm also slightly terrified of reviews because of the nice little paper trail of evidence left behind should the worst happen, but also realize my stance against them is likely not going to add up to a fabulous business model.
 Ah, ok.  Given your statement above, you might consider a sugar site, where you can meet a potential SD for lunch or dinner in a public place with minimal risk for both parties.  Since it's legal, you can avoid the trouble of a screening service, reviews, etc.  I hope that helps.  --

Zangari, thanks so much for your reply!  

I do have a screening policy. The standard reference provider or employment verification. P411/Date Check...here's part of my frustration....you need client reviews for both of those site. Belonging to those sites would help ease concern on the part of prospective clients, but I can't get on those sites until I've had some clients who review....

I just discovered the possible reason the gentlemen who reached out to me haven't set a meeting time actually. It seems my outgoing emails from the last 24 hours were stuck in my outbox. Something going on with the email client I'm using on my phone.  

Hmmm...SD/SB isn't something I've ever given much thought to. It's an interesting idea. I'm not sure it's for me. I think the deal really is I need to make sure I'm comfortable with my screening process. The trail of reviews is really only relevant if I've either done a terrible job separating my online presence from my true identity or I've done a bad job screening and end up in a position that would be disastrous anyway, reviews or not.

Thanks again for taking the time to reply. Appreciate it. Any thoughts on how to resolve the P411 problem by chance?

Gabrielle

 

Posted By: Zangari
Posted By: BespokeMuse
 I'm wondering how a new provider overcomes the natural and understandable aversion clients have to trying a totally unknown quantity.
   
  You don't mention if you're on a screening site like P411 or DateCheck, but that would help.  It's safer for you and your potential clients.  I won't see a provider unless she's on P411--it doesn't matter how hot her pix are or what her reviews say.    
     
Posted By: BespokeMuse
I have a website..and though I've had a couple of queries I've booked zero engagements.  
 
   
  There may be a problem here.  If a guy takes the trouble to contact you, then you've got a fish on the hook (timewasters excluded).   I'm curious about how you're handling these queries. Going back to the previous point, joining a screening service will eliminate a lot of preliminary screening questions that will make a potential client uncomfortable.    
   
Posted By: BespokeMuse
I'm also slightly terrified of reviews because of the nice little paper trail of evidence left behind should the worst happen, but also realize my stance against them is likely not going to add up to a fabulous business model.
   
  Ah, ok.  Given your statement above, you might consider a sugar site, where you can meet a potential SD for lunch or dinner in a public place with minimal risk for both parties.  Since it's legal, you can avoid the trouble of a screening service, reviews, etc.  I hope that helps.  --z  
   
 

Your website is impressive and please don't take offense at what I am going to say.  Your consideration seems a little steep for a lady with no reviews or reputation to back-up your worth.  Please understand I am not saying you are worth all that and more but fellas will be hesitant to invest that much for an unknown experience.

Oh no offense taken @bobinga. Trust me this thought has crossed my mind more than once! Really trying to figure out the happy medium between positioning myself to attract the kind of client that will be a good match for my style of service with the need to make myself a more attractive prospective to the brave soul who 'breaks the seal' so-to-speak :)  It's hard to know where that price point might be as I have nothing to go on but my own research of ads and websites to get a sense of what seems typical for my market. Any thoughts on price point?

Thanks for the input and thanks for checking out the my site!

I'm not against meeting someone who has no reviews and have done so on several occasions, but I am going to do as much research as I can.  Having a well done website with current info, photos and other needed information helps.  Posting ads on TER and other well known sites will also assist.  

When I make contact, I'm going to gauge you based on how well you can communicate and our interaction.  

As far as writing reviews, I am not a fan of doing them, but will do so if I am asked to afterwards.  I find it easier to provide a quick comment on an ad that has been placed here.

Well @AHappyCamper, you have made me a happy camper this morning :)  Good to know that there are people willing to take a look at new, unreviewed providers. I'm fairly happy with my site so I feel pretty good there. Less thrilled with my selfie photos, but they're clear and current at least. I'm hearing a lot of votes for regional board participation which I am happy to follow through on and daily photo posting...also happy to follow through on...I have a definite streak of exhibitionism :)

Thanks so much for the input!

...placed ads here on your TER regional ad board. They're free and you can post once every 7 days. Then posting a daily photo on the Photo Only board lets TER members know about you. Participating in discussions on your regional discussion board will let members know about you and get to know your personality. Getting the attention of reviewers by doing these things should get you some clients that will review. FYI: TER doesn't allow a No review policy.

 Not showing your face, having a provider name, and screening clients are ways to reduce the risk. The reviewers use their board handles to review under so paper trail is somewhat muddied.

The previous poster is correct about P411 and DateCheck but P411 requires you to have reviews to join. I don't know about DateCheck.

If you have the TER seal which links back to TER on the first or second page of your web site you can place a link to your site in any replies you make to discussion threads.

Have you read the Self-Help Center? It has the guidelines for posting ads and linkng your site. The link to this is on the upper right of the board under the red and white life preserver. It's also on the My TER page (see the tab above) at the bottom of the My Quick Links list on the left of the page.

You may have discovered all the information I've included here but if not I hope this helps. Welcome

-- Modified on 3/13/2015 7:07:10 AM

Posted By: xyz23
...placed ads here on your TER regional ad board. They're free and you can post once every 7 days. Then posting a daily photo on the Photo Only board lets TER members know about you. Participating in discussions on your regional discussion board will let members know about you and get to know your personality. Getting the attention of reviewers by doing these things should get you some clients that will review.
   
I have not places ads as of yet. I'm still feeling my way around things and trying to decide if there's something I need to fix in my marketing/web site/verifications situation before advertising like crazy and then becoming background noise (based on the response to my paid ad...granted it's only been up for a couple of days). I do like the idea of participating in the regional discussion board forum a lot. Which shouldn't be an issue because man do I love to talk, lol. I also love the idea of posting daily pictures, but my pics are one of the things that concerns me about my marketing. Selfies all and I'm not in love with any of them really. Trying to walk the line between tasteful and intriguing and not sure I'm loving the results.
Posted By: xyz23
Not showing your face, having a provider name, and screening clients are ways to reduce the risk. The reviewers use their board handles to review under so paper trail is somewhat muddied.  
Which are very good points indeed. My comfort level is going to come down to my comfort level with my screening process at the end of the day I think.
   
Posted By: xyz23
The previous poster is correct about P411 and DateCheck but P411 requires you to have reviews to join. I don't know about DateCheck.
Date Check's the same :( This is the one that's really got me frustrated. I know being able to get verified by P411 would make a huge difference in client's comfort level.
   
Posted By: xyz23
If you have the TER seal which links back to TER on the first or second page of your web site you can place a link to your site in any replies you make to discussion threads.
   
 Have you read the Self-Help Center? It has the guidelines for posting ads and linkng your site. The link to this is on the upper right of the board under the red and white life preserver. It's also on the My TER page (see the tab above) at the bottom of the My Quick Links list on the left of the page.
Done and done. Thanks for the reminder about the TER seal. I had read that last night and promptly forgot!
   
Posted By: xyz23
You may have discovered all the information I've included here but if not I hope this helps. Welcome
Good stuff here xyr23. It has helped and thank you for the welcome :)

-- Modified on 3/13/2015 7:07:10 AM

..them very much. They accomplish their task in my opinion. They are well done. They show a variety of poses and moods. They are real. Keep using them and add others as you like. You will find many here want the candid selfies

Posted By: xyz23
 
  ...them very much. They accomplish their task in my opinion. They are well done. They show a variety of poses and moods. They are real. Keep using them and add others as you like. You will find many here want the candid selfies.  
 
Thank you! That's reassuring to hear.

Joining the discussions on your regional board can help people get to know you and feel safe with you. Try to avoid getting drawn into arguments on the board even if you are right and someone else is wrong, a little spice is nice but to much can be off putting. Posting a photo on the theme day threads on the regional board and photo only board can sometimes provide enough temptation to get you started. Good luck and welcome to TER!

Posted By: BespokeMuse
Hi everyone. New to TER, brand spanking new provider. I've been reading through the board discussions and I know this dilemma has been discussed before, but I would love to hear anecdotal experiences from ladies (and gents) who have btdt.  
   
 I'm wondering how a new provider overcomes the natural and understandable aversion clients have to trying a totally unknown quantity. I have a website, an ad on The Mall That Shall Not Be Named (or so I gather from reading posts here) and though I've had a couple of queries I've booked zero engagements. I'm also slightly terrified of reviews because of the nice little paper trail of evidence left behind should the worst happen, but also realize my stance against them is likely not going to add up to a fabulous business model.  
   
 Right now however, that seems like less of a concern since I've done nothing to be reviewed.  
   
 Anyone care to share some great success stories about successful career launches?  
   
 Thanks and looking forward to participating in the discussions now that I've found my way here :)

Looks like regional board involvement and photo posts are the winners by quite a margin :)  And happily those are both things I can do easily (and economically) while I'm building my presence.  

Thanks so much DJ1985 for the sound advice and warm welcome.

Gabrielle

alexagrey347 reads

E-mail me if you have any questions, or need advice. I'm more than willing to help. I'll PM you my e-mail address

Thanks Alexa! I can't access PMs as I'm not VIP, but I grabbed your email from your site :)

Zangari514 reads

Ok, after checking your website: I see now why the fish are dropping off the hook.  You're trying to land a Marlin.  Like your namesake's hero in "Old Man and the Sea", I hope it doesn't take you 84 days to reel him in.  

 As Bobinga noted, your initial appt donation ("Interlude") is a deal-breaker for 99% of the guys on this board.  They will not drop $1000 for a first date where part of that time is for drinks & chat.  I played in the sugar bowl for three years now, and I can't afford you.  

 I typically will give an SB $100 for a first dinner date (no strings), then the intimate arrangement is $300-$400 every week (which is standard P411 rate).  I'm basically a monger who likes to bang SBs.  You're out of my price range,  but I'm in flyover country, and you're in DC/NYC.   I think your rate of $500 an hour for "established friends" is where you should start for everyone.  But I think you'd be more comfortable in the sugar bowl.  Good luck.  --z

Zangari this post might have made me pout had it not been for the fact that you led with the Hemingway reference :)

So I'm getting a pretty clear picture my rate structure is screwy and needs to be fixed ASAP. I'm re-evaluating based on your feedback and others.  

As far as SB goes...I'm honestly mostly clueless about this phenomenon (and still think it's fairly ironic that this arrangement is legal when it appears to be p4p under the guise of something marginally more relationship-y but that's a topic for another thread I guess). Where's good place to read up on this whole SB/SD thang if you don't mind me asking for more of your time?

Thanks again! The feedback's been great.

Gabrielle

Zangari416 reads

Posted By: BespokeMuse
As far as SB goes...I'm honestly mostly clueless about this phenomenon
  Where have you been?  What has scandalized the nation is that the booming sugar market is now driven by college girls saddled with enormous student debt.  The College SBs have taken over the sugar sites.   These are beautiful girls from middle class families who will jump in bed with a guy twice their age for money.  I'm always amazed.  Looking at your pix and your literary bent, you will fit right in.  

  Unlike the hobby, asking an SD for recent photos before a first date is expected.  And once you meet him, you're not obligated to fuck him.  So don't.  Make him wait. Go on a few dates with several men.  Why just pick one?  Pick two or more that you like. If you get tired of one, dump him and find another.  --z

I have almost literally been living under a rock is where I've been, lol. I had heard that people were jumping out of the companion pool and doing the SB thing more frequently. I must go educate myself on this topic now...

Thanks z.

Zangari383 reads

Posted By: BespokeMuse
I have almost literally been living under a rock is where I've been, lol...I must go educate myself on this topic now...
 You asked in  a previous post for a reading recommendation.  The best article I've seen from an SB's perspective is Melanie Berliet's piece in Vanity Fair, "Desperately Seeking Sugar Daddies".   Berliet  joined a sugar site and went on dates with SDs.  A brilliant piece of writing.  

 I think Berliet cheats at the end.  She writes that shortly after dropping off the sugar site, " a man on the Forbes 400 list asked me out".   LOL.  I love those coincidences, don't you?  That's a Deus ex Machina with sugar on top.  She reeled in that marlin.  If the link below doesn't work, the piece is easily found via google.   --z

Deux ex Machina with sugar on top, lol..love that line. Good read z...thanks for sharing.  

G (who is spending a lazy Sunday re-reading The Old Man and the Sea and Hemingway on Fishing...that marlin doesn't stand a chance)

No VIP status yet so I can't see PMs unfortunately! My email is [email protected] if you want to contact me there :)

I saw that after I sent the PM. No worries, I was just giving you some unsolicited opinions about your site. That aside I think you'll be just fine. You're not only seeking out advice, but you also seem willing to take it. If I may venture an educated guess I'd say that your price is a reflection of your business model and the clientele you're looking to cater to. On its own it's a screening process which weeds out customers you're not seeking. You're looking for higher-end clients who won't be dissuaded by such a high price. The trouble with entering the luxury market out of nowhere is that the customer worries that you might have a higher opinion of your service than they will. There's still a customer base for that, but it's an incredibly small one, thus limiting your access to this industry. You can, as others have suggested, lower your price initially to build a reputation that will, hopefully, be worthy of an eventual increase, or you can associate with a trusted and highly reviewed competitor who would be willing to lend her credibility to your services (I'm not suggesting this is an easy thing to do). SB/SD relationships and agencies are also options, but they might diverge from your goals too much.

Since I'm already taking up your time I might as well give you a synopsis of the PM I sent. I complimented your site (visuals, layout, structure, etc.), your writing, and your beauty. However, I also mentioned that there's a body language issue in the picture greeting visitors because it seems like you have pursed lips which signals a disapproving attitude (I suggested something more seductive, or perhaps a smile instead). I also commented on the fact that there was a resolution issue with the pics in your portfolio. I agree with others regarding the poses and "selfie" style, they seem genuinely seductive and inviting, but I think a higher resolution set would be better.

I continue to wish you all the best.

First let me say I continue to be impressed by the members here how have taken time to respond to my post. Thanks @AtlasStood for the analysis and feedback.

Yes, price point is a marketing strategy. I want to provide the best service I possibly can and I know myself well enough to realize I'm going to be at my absolute best when given the time and space to allow for conversation and flirtation and that style and length of appointment is not everyone's cuppa I know. that said, I've already adjusted my site and rate structure since posting here and getting some feedback. As you said starting lower and adjusting up once I have an established track record makes sense.

Glad you like the general appearance and content of the site. The photos...oh the photos. I need to figure out a better method for taking them with better resolution. Probably time to invest in an external camera for the macbook. I've been relying on the built in and the phone camera. Working on more shots this week. I try to keep my face out of the picture entirely but get what youre saying re: body language.

Thanks again. Truly useful and much appreciated feedback

fartsonhigher1469 reads

is to sign on with an upscale agency, like 5Star in DC. Better agencies offer some sort of satisfaction guarantee for their client, so many clients of agencies will rely on the agency assurance and accept one of their girls without prior reviews.

You may give up a good cut of your rate, but you will build reviews and perhaps even land a couple regulars who will follow you when you go independent

I had considered that as an option, but I'm hesitant as I don't really like the idea of putting my fate in someone else's hands. Who knows....maybe I'll change my mind if I've still not managed to meet anyone after a month or two. It's been less than a week at this point since my site and E ad went live. Patience. I'm just going to keep reminding myself that's a virtue!

Thanks for the reply :)

fartsonhigher1432 reads

I'm not trying to sell you on the agency idea. Like some men, I do not and will not use them. But I have known a couple of good agency owners who treated treat their ladies very well, and were a great springboard for becoming an indy. Some ladies came back after switching to indy because the agency made their life simple, but also because that could take time off and start back up without the hassle of responding to clients during their break, or having to rekindle their business when they came back. There are pros and cons to both.
I've also been friends with ladies who are indy out in the Western US, but work with a D.C. agency when they travel there to work. They felt like the agency route had a greater clientele base on the east coast, and specifically in D.C. But that was just what i was told.
Good Luck To You!

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