Newbie - FAQ

I'm going to say I'm not sure this is a question you can/should ask...
xyz23 45 Reviews 365 reads
posted

...I have never run into this and never felt the need to ask. I can appreciate that you would want to know. However looking at it from the point of view of giving advice to a newbie my first thought was you can't ask that.

If you're a newbie and you contact a provider for the first time to get screened and set an appointment this is a question she isn't going to be sanguine about answering. When initiating contact you shouldn't mention sex and money. Whether or not anyone thinks this really protects you in any way it's still something that isn't done. Provider's will at the very least be very cautious about talking to you if you mention sex and money. Many will cut off communication. (They may think you are LE trying to catch them.) She's wondering why would you be asking about her period. Asking makes a connection to sex.  It could be argued not mentioning money would make it ok to ask but I think not.  

Any question about hygiene is going to be off putting to the provider and may get you hung up on. Especially in this situation of a newbie she doesn't know who has no history for her to check so she can feel confident you will be ok as a client.

Once she has screened you, confirmed that she will see you, and you have a date and time set she may be ok with answering a question like this but I'd say it's more likely she won't.

I wouldn't ask when I set up an appointment even with a lady I've seen often but I can imagine that she would be ok discussing the subject with me since we have some history. But a newbie? You can be as tactful as is possible but I don't think it's going to be OK with her no matter how you ask.

jcfrit21851 reads

What is a polite or appropriate way to ask a provider if she will not be in period when you see her? I'd rather be a bit tactful and not quite so blunt if possible.

You can hope she's professional enough to take a little time off when her period starts, although there is a market for that too...

Specifically Aunt Flo.  

Posted By: jcfrit2
What is a polite or appropriate way to ask a provider if she will not be in period when you see her? I'd rather be a bit tactful and not quite so blunt if possible.

jcfrit2485 reads

Thanks hiddenhills; I think this is a good way to inquire. Just have to hope she knows what the hell I'm talking about. If not, well, guess I'll just ask more directly.

and for the most part, it works well for anything you have in mind.

It would be nice to be informed however.

...I have never run into this and never felt the need to ask. I can appreciate that you would want to know. However looking at it from the point of view of giving advice to a newbie my first thought was you can't ask that.

If you're a newbie and you contact a provider for the first time to get screened and set an appointment this is a question she isn't going to be sanguine about answering. When initiating contact you shouldn't mention sex and money. Whether or not anyone thinks this really protects you in any way it's still something that isn't done. Provider's will at the very least be very cautious about talking to you if you mention sex and money. Many will cut off communication. (They may think you are LE trying to catch them.) She's wondering why would you be asking about her period. Asking makes a connection to sex.  It could be argued not mentioning money would make it ok to ask but I think not.  

Any question about hygiene is going to be off putting to the provider and may get you hung up on. Especially in this situation of a newbie she doesn't know who has no history for her to check so she can feel confident you will be ok as a client.

Once she has screened you, confirmed that she will see you, and you have a date and time set she may be ok with answering a question like this but I'd say it's more likely she won't.

I wouldn't ask when I set up an appointment even with a lady I've seen often but I can imagine that she would be ok discussing the subject with me since we have some history. But a newbie? You can be as tactful as is possible but I don't think it's going to be OK with her no matter how you ask.

jcfrit2292 reads

Thank you xyz23 for your expanded response and counseling. You clearly make several good points. Being a "newbie", that's why I asked the question. We've only practiced this hobby a couple of times and still feel we have a lot to learn. So since it so infrequently happens, I wanted to see if we could lessen the chances of this happening. I can see now how this would imply sexual contact, and all of us want to not imply that. While I feel a bit scolded, you taking the time to fully explain your lesson to me is very much appreciated and the kind of schooling we newbie's need. Thanks again.

Posted By: xyz23
...I have never run into this and never felt the need to ask. I can appreciate that you would want to know. However looking at it from the point of view of giving advice to a newbie my first thought was you can't ask that.  
   
 If you're a newbie and you contact a provider for the first time to get screened and set an appointment this is a question she isn't going to be sanguine about answering. When initiating contact you shouldn't mention sex and money. Whether or not anyone thinks this really protects you in any way it's still something that isn't done. Provider's will at the very least be very cautious about talking to you if you mention sex and money. Many will cut off communication. (They may think you are LE trying to catch them.) She's wondering why would you be asking about her period. Asking makes a connection to sex.  It could be argued not mentioning money would make it ok to ask but I think not.  
   
 Any question about hygiene is going to be off putting to the provider and may get you hung up on. Especially in this situation of a newbie she doesn't know who has no history for her to check so she can feel confident you will be ok as a client.  
   
 Once she has screened you, confirmed that she will see you, and you have a date and time set she may be ok with answering a question like this but I'd say it's more likely she won't.  
   
 I wouldn't ask when I set up an appointment even with a lady I've seen often but I can imagine that she would be ok discussing the subject with me since we have some history. But a newbie? You can be as tactful as is possible but I don't think it's going to be OK with her no matter how you ask.

You may see ads & that's the reason.   No, I don't think there's a discrete way to ask this question.  Her hygene is her stock in trade & she'll always tell you she'll be clean for you.  Asking her is likely to be considered insulting.  
Bad hygene is something that'ssometimes mentioned in reviews...  

-- Modified on 11/29/2014 11:20:54 AM

As a guy... I would probably just give a wink and a smile and say something along the lines of "you can make it up to me later" to start the conversation about just how we are going to handle this. Some girls are ruthless, but I think most of them genuinely want to do a good enough job that people will come back, and these kinds of conversations always seem to go better in person. Email has always seemed a little awkward for this (to me).

I had a gf go on a trip with a guy and start. He bitched the entire day that they overlapped, and tried to pay her less without any discussion. AND he still wanted her to go at it! That was totally classless. Whatever you do, do not do that, lol

Just don't. It's uncouth and indiscreet. We know how to deal with our periods without hampering your good time.

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