Erotic Humor

Hobbying jokes
89Springer 2635 reads
posted

Let's see how long this topic is open.

A provider goes into a hardware store to get a hinge for a kitchen cabinet. The clerk is up on a ladder getting one from a box.

"Do you wanna screw for that hinge?" he asks.

"No", she says, "but I'll blow you for that toaster over there."

NewEnglandGangsta906 reads

Answer: a PASTAtute.  

 
Q: Who makes more money, a drug dealer or a hoe?  
A: A hoe because da hoe can wash her crack and reuse dat shit to make mo money from da same crack.  

Q: What does a hoe and bungee jumping have in common?  
A: Dey bof cost money to enjoy but if da rubber breaks, we screwed!  

Q: A chinese hoe gave birth to a black baby.
A: She named him Sum Ting Wong

Q: Why do jews like to watch porn hoe movies backwards?
A: Dey like da part where the hoe gives money back.

 

This guy goes into a horror house and says he wants the best blowjob he can get for $100. The madam says go to the room take off all your clothes and we will be with you as soon as possible.

So he goes to the room and takes off all of his clothes and a few minutes later a fine hooker comes in the room. She gives him a blowjob and he busts a nut and then she reaches under the bed and pulls out a jar and spits in it. He says will you do that again if I give you another $100.

She says sure. He gives her another $100 and she gives him another blowjob and he busts even a bigger nut this time. She pulls out the jar again and spits in it. He asks what the jar was for and she says "I have a bet with the girl across the hall whoever fills up their jar first gets to drink them both".

And then there's the guy who went to Victoria's Secret to buy a lingerie for his provider. He was very self-conscious and anxious to leave so he didn't even look at what he bought, just scurried out with the box plunked in a plain bag.  

That night he handed her the box and asked her to change into "something sexy."

She went into the bedroom, put her boxed gift on the closet floor, stripped naked and came back to her client.

He looked at the lady and cried out, "For the prices they charge at least they could've IRONED IT!"

Register Now!