It was Christmas time and the neighborhood mailman was making his rounds.  Most people had a little something to thank him: a fruitcake, a homemade hat, a bottle of wine, etc.  At one house he rang the bell and the door was answered by the lady of the house wearing nothing at all.  She didn't say a word, led him by the hand to the bedroom and screwed his brains out.  Afterward she took him downstairs, handed him a dollar and cooked him a lovely breakfast.  Somewhat puzzled, the mailman asked where all this had come from.

"Well," the woamn said "last night I asked my husband what we should get the mailman for Christmas.  He said "The mailman!  Fuck him, give him a dollar."  Breakfast was my idea."