Dude not the best advice to give a newbie because if some guy started that with me, he would be in for a very rude awakening.
Hey guys,
So I have not as yet popped my "Hobby Cherry" here, pretty much been lurking for the last several months.
A couple of things kinda holding me back from taking the plunge.
I notice in the reviews most of the girls here go for DFK, with plenty also open to DATY.
Now in my personal life I'm a big fan of both, but the idea of kissing some girl who may have just had a mouthful of manmeat an hour ago...or going down on a girl who may have just been sausage-stuffed an hour ago...how do you guys get past it???
I'm certainly no prude, and am educated on the risks of STD's and know both are low risk activities, it's just the "uck" factor that's stopping me from jumping in.
And shit, as long as I'm asking questions. Once again in my personal life I enjoy rough sex (on the girl, hehe, not on me), nothing abusive or deviant, hair pulling, ass slapping, dirty talk, stuff like that.
Are there any girls here who are, well, not into it, but tolerate it? And how do you know if you've gone too far?
Usually I don't get into the kinkier side of things until I've dated a girl for a few months and we achieve a certain comfort level, but that can't happen meeting a perfect stranger for the first time.
Any advice, or tips would be greatly appreciated!!!
-- Modified on 9/26/2014 12:20:47 AM
Are there any girls here who are, well, not into it, but tolerate it? And how do you know if you've gone too far?
You might consider the sugar scene, where the girls are way more selective & more expensive than a provider. An SB doesn't bang anonymous strangers. If hot girl/extremely low volume is what you're looking for, go SB. You'll pay more for her. But most SBs do have a bf, and she may have already banged/sucked him on the day she's meeting you. She may also have another SD. You want exclusivity? Stick with your gf.
Are there any girls here who are, well, not into it, but tolerate it? And how do you know if you've gone too far?
What you're describing here sounds like typical sex play. I don't think it will be a problem. Whether it's an SB or provider, just communicate with your partner. She'll tell you if she doesn't like something. Good luck, --z
I was mostly curious as to HOW guys here get past it?
Take you for instance, I know you're active here, probably an active hobbyist as well, do YOU DFK and DATY with the providers? What do you do, just not think about it and hope they used mouthwash before you rolled up?
I mean, hahaha, you probably have inadvertently tasted a few dozens of cocks without even knowing it!!!
You don't need to be a certain age to be an SD. If a guy is seeing providers on a regular basis, then he probably can afford an arrangement with an SB.
Hey again,
I seemed to have offended you, it truly was not my intention.
IRL, I'm courteous, articulate and a gentleman, there's nothing to clean up. I just thought here, considering what this board is, I could loosen up a bit and just say what I wanted, straight to the point.
Again, apologies.
You don't need to be a certain age to be an SD. If a guy is seeing providers on a regular basis, then he probably can afford an arrangement with an SB.
You're a bit vulgar, aren't you. You do understand that even your gf has sucked the cocks of other men. How does that taste? I hope you'll curb your vulgarity when you meet your provider, otherwise she probably won't see you again. --z
...While some of what he says here is useful his delivery leaves quite a bit to be desired.
yz23--I bestow on you an honorary degree, you now have a brain!
WhiteCloak--I bestow on you this medal of courage, so you won't be afraid of those providers!
Hbyist+Truth: I bestow on you these ruby slippers, so you can go back to Kansas!
Anyone up for playing Tin Man? You're all Welcome! --
Dude not the best advice to give a newbie because if some guy started that with me, he would be in for a very rude awakening.
In fairness to the OP, he did state "nothing abusive" in regard to "hair pulling & ass slapping".' That does sound like sex play. Are you going to get upset if someone smacks your ass while going full bore doggy style(?) If you answer 'yes' to that, then you're just a little prima donna.
If the OP is actually trying to inflict *pain* on the provider, then I'll concede your point. regards, --z
And next time spell "Prima Donna" with capitals to really make your point.
Then how come in all the time I have been doing this, the type of guys I see have never started to pull my hair or slap me without asking first if that's what I am into?
So what's next you are going to tell me that these guys aren't hobbying right? Because you might like to pull hair and slap a hooker without bothering to find out if she is okay with it?
Next you'll be telling newbies who might wonder if a finger up the ass is okay to just go ahead and shove one in. Yeah, good luck with that one too.
-- Modified on 9/26/2014 8:49:51 AM
Funny how you threw in 'finger up the ass' out of nowhere. If you really want that, I'll do that to you. But I'm charging extra because you're such a 'Prima Donna'. --z
Sure slap my ass and pull my hair and this "dead fish", will spin around like a Great White off seal island, so fast you won't even see it coming and return the favor.
And then my pimp will blacken both your eyes for damaging the goods. As for the finger, I'd rather bend you over and fist it for all it's worth...for free just to see the look of pleasure on your face.
Did it ever cross your mind that this type of sex play (hair pull, ass slap) can be done without hurting a provider. Actually, you do *know* that. You just want a little attention.
Hi there,
I took his advice to mean, with consent from the provider first. I too, (and perhaps I wasn't clear), was only asking if there were some girls who would be OK, with it. Not that I would just go willy nilly without discussing boundaries first.
I'm. Not. That. Guy.
He seems to know more about what a provider can deal with...make that all providers. He seems to be the authority and me actually being a provider that one might actually meet...what do I know.
-- Modified on 9/28/2014 1:52:44 PM
a conversation about what you want is a must and will get you what you want and how to ramp up to it in session. yes there are plenty of providers who are ok and prefer no DFK and no DATY. just use your words and ask! if you are good with your hands and are willing to actually listen you can get her wild just that way and some gals really love mildly rough sex that has no kinky elements. just being taken. oh la la
Say you attended a play with Richard Burton (back in the day) playing Hamlet.
You could get into the play and enjoy it, or think to yourself: Hey, that's not really Hamlet, just some guy playing him.
And so it is with the hobby. True, there's a lot more audience participation in the hobby then with a stage play, but the idea is the same.
Some people are not cut out for the hobby on account of their preoccupation with safety, or getting arrested, or - as in your case - not being able to disassociate the gal from the fantasy.
But try it once. Maybe you'll surprise yourself.
As for rough play, you are seeking a sub, as they are known in the business. Not sure if that is specifically noted on the TER profiles, but you can ask. There are many of them out there, and they can be a pretty wild trip, as I found out after meeting a few.
That allows or enjoys that. If you pull out the hair pulling or slapping on a lady that does not you might be in for a huge and unpleasant surprise.
You will know if you have gone too far if she hits you back or gets up and leaves.
OMG. You *really* have the wrong idea about me!
I'm not some beast that only gets off on rough sex, I would never try anything with anyone, provider or personal GF, until I had discussed it with them.
I was just asking...this whole thing is new to me, and I don't know what's typical or not
This is the newbie board and I did not want you to go hell for leather and get in trouble or or on a DNS list.
There are plenty of ladies that will enjoy that type of sex but there will be plenty that don't, so asking is really important.
Find one and go have some fun with her.
she may also have picked her nose, taken a dump, popped a zit, eaten a liverwurst sandwhich, or any number of other things that might not exactly be turn ons to you. It's all psychological, so just learn to live in the moment of being with a sexy lady who is THERE FOR YOU for an hour or two. Once the fun has commenced, I really don't think you'll be thinking about other guys' weenies.
Hmmm, good points I suppose.
Also, hahaha, you said weenie.
you have read about the value of TER VIP in being able to read the details in the reviews as well as PM other reviewers. What you should care about are how the provider treats her hobbyist of the hour. Does she make him feel like a king? Or, does she go through the motions because she has seen 4 or more guys already that day.
Providers take better care of their body, especially regarding hygiene, than civie girls who go to bars to get their rocks off with one night stands.
Does that help you get over your hangup over the potential "dirtiness" of providers? If I had to make a generalization, the provider you encounter will be "cleaner" and more well-groomed than the girl you're trying to pick up at the bar (notwithstanding the very low rent providers). The truth is that the older you get, the more you're just happy to get laid. As long as she's focused on me, I don't really give a shit about what's happened before or after our encounter.
I'm a fan of the style of play you describe and I don't have much trouble getting it because I make it clear to her that I respect her a human being with value before we get down and dirty. During the action, the key is communication: tell her what you like, and *stop* when she says anything synonymous with NO.
But frankly, you just don't seem to have the maturity to venture in these waters yet. The idea that by kissing her you've just tasted every cock she's sucked is really an immature, childish concept. I get the feeling that you're going to be a bad client. Please wait until you can appreciate her as simply the hot, sexy creature she is.
Hi there, thank you so much for the reply, some good info.
You're the second member to comment on my post negatively, I seem to have gotten off to an amazing start in this community 
I wasn't trying to offend, I don't speak like this IRL, and I didn't mean to come across as immature or vulgar.
I simply thought this board being what it was, I could speak my mind more directly and not mind my P's and Q's.
And it's a little unfair of you to judge me so completely based off a post that perhaps wasn't as thought out as it should have been, but was harmless in intent.
I think I'd make an excellent client! But what do I know, I make a lousy boyfriend.
After all, I don't know you. The issue is the general stigma that everyone involved in this realm is dirty, diseased, or "unclean" in some manner. Sex workers are often talked about as the dregs of society and your original post just reeked of that mindset (ex. "yuck factor" - your words). Sorry, but I felt it necessary to be a little harsh.
Now, climb on in, there's a lot of fun to be had!
Now, climb on in, there's a lot of fun to be had!
Fair enough
I ask them if they would like to join me. Usually they do. But if they don't I've never had an instance where the lady wasn't fresh. It not something I give any consideration to.
On the kissing, when you give her a hug at the beginning, just turn your head if she tries to kiss you. She'll get it. On DATY, just don't do it. If you're concerned about her not getting off, ask her to bring her favorite toy and use it on her
other than your own imagination. CP, and others, have made some excellent points. To answer you main question however, whenever I'm enjoying DFK or DATY with a girl the LAST thought on my mind is where she's been earlier. And I think the lovely lady I'm with has a lot to do with that!!!
You need to just have fun and enjoy the moment, because believe me those moments fly by pretty quickly!
So I would say just give it a shot, see what happens, and if you still have those concerns then just don't do it. And remember, the lady may be wondering where you have just been or doing so make your sure your mouth and hands are "clean" as well.