These ladies are champions at ignoring men's flaws, both real and perceived. I'm sure many guys have hobbied after open-heart surgery (not the same day) and have a scar your size. Same for massive weight loss and the resultant loose skin. If you think your body image issues are a concern, then have a real life relationship with a woman and learn how minimal your issues really are.
I get that you are scared of getting naked with a woman, and the thought of seeing her openly repulsed or even just flinch at your body causes you great anxiety. But you are more scared of the thought of what "might be" than the reality of what "can be" if you just set up a meeting and go. Hell, if you want super assurance then meet with a provider who's known to cultivate/manage for 10/10 reviews and it's a near lock that she'll take it all in stride. Get off the bench, go play, live life.As a child I had to have a serious surgery which resulted in large 10 inch scar right down the center of my chest. The medication I had to take for a period afterward caused me to gain a large amount of weight mostly gone now but left me with some lose skin and stretch marks on top of the scar . I'm fairly good with woman until it comes time to lose the clothes, my confidence leaves right along with it . I become very self conscious and it has made it hard for me to be intimate with woman in my private life at times . The one thing that has kept me from trying the hobby is how they will react to me and how to broach the subject with them. I know this is a business and they are there for the money but I don't want anyone having to pretend if I'm genuinely making them uncomfortable with my appearance .
Should I disclose this before are first meeting and for any of the woman on the board what is your honest opinion would this make you uncomfortable and not want to meet
...which will take you far when meeting, and enjoying the company of courtesans.
Personally, I would not expect you to disclose your scar before our date, but if you truly do feel that it might offend a lady, I would bring it up during your conversation, before retiring to the boudoir.
I applaud your weight loss, and honesty, and I wish you many happy and fulfilling dates.
Hugs and Kisses,
Kelly
f you're on a screening site (and you should be), you can disclose info about the scar in the 'client bio' section of your profile. That may relieve some anxiety on your part--I'm quite sure this is bothering you more than any providers. It also sounds like it's affecting your performance in the bedroom--with girlfriends as well as providers.
This scar is more than just a scar--it represents a childhood trauma that you're still carrying around. You might want to see a therapist regarding the origins of that scar--I think that memory still haunts you. Plastic surgery may also be a reasonable option here. A surgeon may be able to remove/tighten the excess skin and perhaps make the scar less noticeable. I think you should pursue both these avenues to heal the mind & body. Take care, --
Therapy is not the answer to everything that bothers us.
A little bit of experience in the hobby with a couple of caring and non-judgmental women (which is most of them) will go just as far as countless hours of therapy, at a fraction of the cost. As for your suggestion about plastic surgery, do you really think this is the first time the subject has come up?
I think we should stick to the subject at hand, and quit trying to fix things that may or may not be broken, with only a very few clues with which to make your diagnosis.
A little bit of experience in the hobby --snip--
These ladies are champions at ignoring men's flaws, both real and perceived. I'm sure many guys have hobbied after open-heart surgery (not the same day) and have a scar your size. Same for massive weight loss and the resultant loose skin. If you think your body image issues are a concern, then have a real life relationship with a woman and learn how minimal your issues really are.
I get that you are scared of getting naked with a woman, and the thought of seeing her openly repulsed or even just flinch at your body causes you great anxiety. But you are more scared of the thought of what "might be" than the reality of what "can be" if you just set up a meeting and go. Hell, if you want super assurance then meet with a provider who's known to cultivate/manage for 10/10 reviews and it's a near lock that she'll take it all in stride.
Get off the bench, go play, live life.
Sex workers regularly assist disabled and disfigured individuals with their erotic needs. Judging from your self description, it sounds like you view your appearance as far worse than it objectively is (think of an anorexic only seeing a fat person in the mirror). Yes, some inexperienced and superficial providers may react poorly, but there are plenty who will respond enthusiastically to your kindness. If you're really hung up on it, just talk it out with her when you arrive for your appointment. Now, hop to it already!
...Search here on TER for a mature provider as they like all of us that have lived life for a while have been there and done that. Life happens. Mature people understand that. Your scar won't offend them or cause them to be repulsed. If they don't know about it and they react it would be because of not expecting it much more than being repulsed or revolted by it. Contact a provider, give her your screening information, include a matter of fact statement about the scar (you may want to do that after passing screening) that way it won't be a surprise.
The suggestion of joining P411 and putting it on your profile there is a good one.
where you should be looking. With TER VIP you can read the details in reviews to gather this info. These ladies have been around the block a time or two and are experienced at helping newbies get past any mental hangups they may have.
As long as you are a clean and respectful gentleman and your envelope contains the correct green stuf, you will be fine.
Good luck and enjoy.
Is that your looks rarely if at all play a part in whether a hooker will see you.
Since I won't speak for all hookers, looks matter not one iota to me. If you are clean, respectful, have the right donation and respect her boundaries and treat a hooker like a human being, you are good to go.
In addition, a hooker might pretend plenty of things but I will hang onto that limb I am sitting on and state that, again, looks wont be high on that list.
I realize logical this problem is more in my head then anything else.
But I still feel better with some of you confirming it.
I just need to get on with it and give it a try. Thanks to everyone for there helpful advice.
For that matter you could leave your undershirt on if you want.
Take the leap. Wear your shirt. Dim the lights. Just feel comfortable. Personal hygeine is the key to success. Tell the provider up front if you want. If she doesn't want to see you, move on. Believe it or not, we are all real people with feelings and I have met so many great women over the years. If you are a gentleman and clean up before you see a provider, your scars won't matter. You will build great memories and have the time of your life. Just get out there. Hope you're smiling real soon
You really have nothing to worry about as long as you do your research and pick an experienced lady. I've been through a lot health wise, I also have a scar from open heart surgery as well as being an above the knee amputee on my right leg, and I am only in my early 30s. I let them know about my amputation before hand and have never had a lady decline to see me and have never been turned down when requesting subsequent visits.
As others have said as long as you are clean, treat them well, and pay them their rate you will have some great experiences.