I had my first hobby experience yesterday. Good TCB, and very friendly. I discovered, though, that I wasn't so much a fan of the DFK, perhaps due to how different it was from my wife of 13 years, and also perhaps the provider might be a smoker, which I am not a fan of. Just an unpleasant taste. I don't think that was the whole problem, though. I shot once, but not for lack of trying for the second. I just couldn't raise the flag again, despite some vey enthusiastic coaxing from the provider. I know that nervousness had a lot to do with my performance, but maybe there was more in was dealing with internally? Some other factors might have also included the provider being cute, but not my ideal dream girl, and her immediate ease in talking to me about her personal life outside the hobby, including children.
I suppose if I have any questions, they would be along the lines of whether my feeling this way is normal after a first time. I have only had two partners in my life, and I married the second. I decided to hobby not because I am not happy with my marriage, but because I thought I would like to sample different experiences that I have never had the chance to in my life. I rationalized that since there is no emotional attachment that it would be not that different than jacking off to porn. Perhaps I am finding it hard to separate the emotional connection of lovemaking from the mechanics of engaging in the hobby. Part of why I chose this particular provider was her lower price and friendliness. I feel like I might have better luck with someone who more closely resembles my ideal? I'm afraid that it's also possible that I'm just not cut out for the hobby, since my member has been less than responsive than normal even afterwards now, nearly 24 hours after the encounter. Does anyone have any thoughts to share with me?Yeah, what you are describing is totally normal in p4p. I remember it took me 4 or 5 different providers and different type sessions before I even started to know what I wanted and what to look for.
Many guys express a certain disappointment after only one or just a few sessions. Some of the reviews here will lead you to believe a Playboy like goddess is abut to enter your realm when it is actually little Mary Jo from down the block. Not that Mary Jo is bad, but sometimes our expectations, especially as newbs, run away from reality more often than not.
The one part about your post that stood out to me is the "lower price" you mentioned but you don't state if you could afford more. If you can, try taking a step up. That can make ALL the difference in the world.
Yes, its possible this hobby isn't for you. It isn't for everyone. One thing is for sure, you wont really know after one session but I think you will def know after 4 or 5.
Do your homework here, research the next girl more thoroughly and try again. One of these girls is bound to rock your world. But if they don't, then you will know for certain this p4p stuff isn't for you. Good luck.
Thanks, Jack. I've learned in my short time here that you pull no punches. As for the money question, yes, I can afford a little more. I just wasn't sure about blowing too much on my first time, especially having just paid for TER and P411 memberships in the past couple of weeks, too. A lot of the ladies I have my eye on do require more than just Basic P411, so my initial options are limited. I'll save up a few more weeks and decide if I want another try.
I also forgot to mention that when my wife sucks it, it's much better than I got yesterday. Right now that would have to be my baseline, which might be a pretty high bar.
It says if they smoke in profile fyi, may wanna stick with non smokers next time, . No mints can hide ashtray breath , its like in the skin tissues.
Many providers are smokers and their profiles say "no."
..say they do not smoke, when in fact they smell like ashtrays.
I have never smoked, and never will.
Hugs and Kisses,
Kelly
Yes of course that would be true for client profiles too on verification sites. (As well I'm sure there are innacurate weights and ages) I was only pointing out to Angel that many profiles are incorrect since she recommended to check profiles to select nonsmokers.
I can't say with complete certainty that it was a smoker's mouth, but I can't think of what else could have made it taste like that. The closest comparison I can make is a particularly objectionable IPA I sampled at a brewery recently, whose distinguishing characteristics were a bitter flavor reminiscent of grass and dandelions, or at least what I'd expect them to taste like after cutting the lawn. As far as beer goes, I prefer a full-bodied milk stout. As it was, I drank the IPA, since it was at a fundraiser and I paid $100 to get in. I had two drinks that night, which essentially means that one horrible beer basically cost me $50.
Anyway, back on topic, I couldn't smell anything gross about the provider, but that taste was rather strong. All of her profiles say no smoking, though. I don't think there's a way to know for sure without going in, huh?
Smokers mouth tastes like an ashtray, not green-bitter. I'm wondering if she has a particular nasty herbal tincture or mouthwash that she is using? Either way - if you do not like a providers breath, please ask if she has any mouth wash or breath mints handy! Most of us do. We would much rather you want to kiss us, than suffer in silence.
; )
You totally get what you pay for in this hobby. Spend more and you'll probably get better results. Not only are they generally more attractive, reliable, and skilled, but they are also better at setting and maintaining the mood you may want/need. I would consider smokers breath and discussion of her children to be a bad sign and not something that you should have to endure. As Jack says they aren't all Playboy bunnies but there are plenty of attractive and professional women out there that should be more to your liking. You don't specifically mention this but finding someone who has more experience and closer to your age might make you feel more comfortable as well. You may be one of those that likes the connection portion of the hobby and for me that would be difficult to find in a 20 year old girl. Keep trying, I did and I got better at reading between the lines in the ads/reviews and figuring out which ones really were going to be to my liking. Good luck.
Thanks, Goliath. I will definitely do more research before next time. I had fun researching the first time, anyway. I guess it's like with any other endeavor: You learn from each experience how not to fall into the same trap. The thing is, though, that this was a more mature provider, in her early 30's. As I think back to the moments I had with her, perhaps it was the opposite of what you suggest. I think I'm probably less willing to actually connect emotionally with a provider than simply physically. Before you posted, I thought I might try to look for a younger girl for next time.
As I said initially, I'm not escaping from a bad marriage. It's great and I love my wife and family deeply. Rather, I'm being selfishly shallow and wanting to try a variety of different women, since I missed out on that in my younger days. All kinds of women get my motor humming, so I figured a few years of doing this should sate my appetite, maybe even show me how the grass isn't necessarily greener elsewhere. I just didn't want to have lived my life and wondered what it would have been like with all the different types we guys fantasize about. At least after yesterday I can now cross redhead off my list.
you might want to step up a bit and find a more GFE lady who is known for her kissing skills, among other talents. When you read the details in reviews her skill level should jump out at you.
This might sound strange to some but it's how I feel since he's a complete newbie and he's only been with two civvie ladies in his life.
Steph
Thanks for the honesty OP. I am in the same boat as you with my first appointment this weekend. I know its not going to be perfect and hot as porn but still excited and nervous as hell. Will post again after it happens.
Great post - one I can totally relate to! My first experience was with someone whose donation was not inexpensive and whose pictures did not come close to matching reality. I was so disappointed but still it was a good sexual experience otherwise. I definitely did more homework before choosing to spend time with another provider!
I definitely learned that you will never know the truth about a provider until you have experienced time with her. There are so many unique factors to "chemistry". Typically though, a provider whose donation is higher and has many reviews in the 8's and 9's, will not disappoint you! I have noticed themes in reviews that seem to be pretty accurate in terms of the experience. For example, when many reviewers are saying the provider is "sweet" and a great kisser then she probably is!
I won't visit any provider that does not have many reviews in the 8's or 9's, no matter the donation rate. It has been totally worth it!