I scheduled an apt for a provider who only does outcalls. Seemed like a quality (if new) provider in my area, she has two very favorable reviews. Booked a hotel room, got it all setup, and then the apt time came, went, and nothing. She didn't respond to any txts that I sent, she didn't answer or call back when I called her. This has been over 48 hours now, and I've heard nothing back from her. So I figured I would leave a review to warn others, only TER rejects my review as a "no-show". They only accept reviews where I meet the provider face to face. WTF? How am I supposed to warn others about her behavior if I can't leave a review when she blows me off without a word? I know that providers have their own 'blacklist' site for hobbyists who no-call, no-show. What gives? BTW, I am a paying VIP member, so I'm not trying to game free status from reviews.
and you tell the story, and you say "PM me for the provider's name"
Then you tell the people who PM you who she is.
I'm sorry that happened, btw.
Curious, why keep it via a PM? I'm not trying to be rude, just trying to understand etiquette. Thanks for helping, it just really burns to drop the cash on a room wasted.
It's more about etiquette. While it is awful to be stood up, when you weigh in everything, if a thread is made with her name, it can quickly turn into a nasty thing that can end up hurting her way more than what it hurt you to spend on that hotel. Though it was rude, it's the version of taking not the highest road, but at the very least a higher one than revenge.
between coming off like a vengeful ass and sharing the experience is hard to see. I asked a friend to txt her ad, looking for an apt. She is responding to him promptly, but still will not respond to me. No i'm sorry, i forgot, or had car trouble, or anything!
Did anything happen in your communication that could have spooked her, talk of sex and money or anthing like that? If she's a young or high volume girl NCNS happens quite often with them, they'll block your number like it was your fault and move on to the next guys in line without thinking twice about it.
Nope, all our communication was clean and above board. We settled on day/time for the apt, the exact address of the hotel, and exchanged pleasantries. No inappropriate talk what-so-ever.
If you're having a friend text her, that means your judgment may be getting a bit compromised.
I'm not sure if anyone will agree but as personal advice before this spins out of control, send her an email and let her know that you would appreciate a response by a certain time or you're going to make it known on your local TER board. Maybe this gets a response. When women who have been cancelled on and want at least enough to cover the hotel aren't getting their point across, they sometimes throw out the blacklisting BEFORE they actually do it.
But you have to keep in mind that if she responds, you have to respect that response, even if it is "I didn't feel comfortable at the last minute." And not that you're looking for an excuse that will necessarily be to your satisfaction.
You may be right. And this is the first anything like this has happened to me, so perhaps I am reacting more than some hobbyists who have been around longer. But it is incredibly rude. I was concerned that a legitimate reason prevented her from seeing me or responding, such as a medical emergency, etc. But that clearly is not the case. And I do appreciate the advice, and I am 100% fine if it just turns out that she became uncomfortable and didn't want to see me. No problem, that's fine. But I do not feel that expecting an answer or apology is asking too much.
While wanting an explanation isn't unreasonable expecting one might be and getting the respect you deserve from her is unlikely. My advice is to move on and find someone else that will be happy to see you and show you the good time and respect you should get as the custumer. Even if you do get in touch with her you wont change her ways. It sucks that NCNS happen, but they do happen every day on both sides. Count yourself lucky if this is the first time it's happened to you, you must be doing things right.
Your initial knee jerk reaction was actually spot on.
YOU aren't doing anything to her reputation, her actions are. If she can't be bothered to even tell you why she wasted not only your time, but your money as well, you not only have every right, but IMO you have the obligation to shout it from the highest hill. Until guys (and girls) stand up to rude behavior we are all giving tacit approval of said behavior.
NCNS is the ultimate in rudeness, and if she cared for her reputation she could have sent you a one line text telling you to basically "fuck off" even that would be better than leaving you hanging.
In answer to your OP and the responses you have received from the two ladies, I ABSOLUTELY disagree with both of them and think that there is no reason whatsoever not to name names.
Keep in mind that this site was created for this exact reason, not to act as an ad venue for hookers, but for guys to share information, both good and bad about the women that we see, or in your case "don't see".
I will warn you that you may run into a few White Knights, spineless little suck ups who run to the defense of any women who's reputation they deem has been sullied, but pay them no mind, you have the truth on your side, and if she did it to you, she either has or will do so to someone else as well.
The "I didn't feel comfortable at the last minute" b.s. needs to come BEFORE the appointment time, not days after.
It's one thing to say he shouldn't out her within 24-48 hours or so after the NCNS without knowing her fate, but once he has iron clad proof she blew him off, or if 3 or 4 days pass, he needs to go public.
There are different ways to do that, asking guys to pm him for her info for instance, but the only way this nonsense ever stops is to get called out on it.
Do you think a girl will do it twice if she already has a prior? But without that first shout out to all the mongers, she has carte blanche to do it again...and again...and again.
You know I respect you but I think you need to rethink this one.
I've yet to see a post about a NCNS that didn't end in a train wreck. The last one I saw was in Chicago and the woman came back and explained herself and made the guy look pretty awful.
Just seems there's always 2 sides to a story, hence why I also go on the other side and try to convince women (when they want advice) not to blacklist guys, to be the bigger person (unless it's a dangerous point that they are blacklisting them for).
There was also a guy that went to several boards talking about a porn star I think who was traveling and had stood him up, he went to 3 different boards! So then people turned on him as well.
You may be right, there may be a good way to do it, someone who can just state the facts, and share the name, and be done with it. But, if it's not crafted correctly or there's absolutely no holes to the story, just seems like a train wreck potential. What if she was going to explain herself (even if after the fact), but he seemed too angry. Sometimes when I've had people cancel on me I'll write to them something like "I assume we're not meeting since it's already such and such time. Kind of disappointed since I try to fit this in when I can, but I hope you're ok. Best of luck." I usually then get a response. Some take it much more seriously and start harassing guys. Is that going to make him come see me after all?
I have also seen trainwrecks that started with exactly the post that you suggested, a warning post that names no names, but the BSC hooker that committed the NCNS recognized herself and went all BSC with her accuser.
The truth of the matter is, when a hooker goes all BSC over an accusation of NCNS, it shows to the entire board just how BSC she is. I avoid these women like the plague.
IMO if a woman (or a man) has to come on the board to defend her/himself to a NCNS charge and that's the first communication since the incident, that person has already lost the argument IMO. I am a businessman and I take my business personally, if I were on my way to an appointment and got into a wreck and was unconscious for a week, the very first thing I would do upon regaining consciousness would be to reach out to the person I stood up, I would not log into TER first and THEN respond there. There is NO excuse that I buy when the defense is posted on TER instead of directly to the person who was stood up.
I've frequently advocated understanding the provider's end of the business, including not seeing anyone they didn't wish to, setting their rates as they please, and offering whatever services they choose to. I believe very strongly that this is a professional job that requires intelligence, skill and a work ethic to be one of the best. That said this seems like an odd position to take.
I've had several women cancel on me last minute (life happens) but I always get a call or text that tells me they aren't coming with excuses that range from the plausible to the fantastic. I don't really care what reason they give (though it does affect my interest in trying again), I've even had girls tell me that between the time they made the appointment and the day of, they "found Jesus". Any excuse, with any kind of timeliness works for me, but NCNS just isn't OK. In an industry where women are striving to be seen as professional and whose time needs to be respected, they should comport themselves with that level of professionalism. I don't think this type of behavior can be justified in any way.
tl;dr: Either NCNS is no big deal in which case it won't hurt her rep, or it is a big deal in which case it ought to be reported. If a simple post warning of it will severely impact her business then she ought to know she shouldn't be doing it. Guys get blacklisted for this, I'm not sure why women shouldn't
Then you tell the people who PM you who she is.
I'm sorry that happened, btw.
Post on the regional board and say you know a girl that NS on you.
I would recommend you ask them to pm you to give out her info bc otherwise her WK will come flying in and trash you.
But if you can withstand that heat, go for it and fk the WK's.
regardless of any culpability on the providers' part.
I am not sure that you can't mention a provider's name if she was a no-call-no-show (NCNS). Go ahead and post about it on your local board and see.
They don't ever think that a girl they saw for a few hours of their lives could possibly NCNS someone.
Keep them at bay by following my previous suggestion, if you want. If they then choose to cause a storm, you will get more reasonable guys to take your back.
You'd be helping the next monger out with your info and hopefully he won't be subject to the same bull shit she put you thru.
Pay it forward.
One option would be to post on your Local Board to give other guys a heads-up.
However, you might want to give the provider a little more time to offer an explanation. You mention it's been 48 hours, but in the big scheme of life, that's really not very long.
There could be any number of reasonable explanations why she NCNS (although a simple call or text would have negated a negative reaction, not the disappointment), Death in the family, Medical Emergency, etc.
If it were me, I'd try one more time to contact her for her response.
Chiguy
That's a good idea. I'll try reaching out to her again. I understand that emergencies occur, but I don't think a simple txt is too much to expect. If providers blacklist guys who NCNS, then they have to expect the same in return. I've cancelled apts with providers before, have been asked to send a courtesy donation to make up for it, and I have done so happily. Went on to later see that provider and all was good. I will try to contact her again and see what happens. Thanks for the advice.
No need to wait any longer if any of those are true. Max I would give her is 72 hours.
Sent her a follow up txt and still nothing...
She obviously wasn't in a car accident since she answered someone else inquiring promptly. She continues not to respond to you now.
You got the hotel room to see her so you incurred the cost. She never let you know she wasn't coming no text no call no email no NOTHING.
If it is what you want to do, POST on your local board as suggested by several people here.
I personally think she just f'ked up and doesn't want to deal with it now.
Also, in the future, if this ever happens again and you have a room, put up a post explaining you just got stood up and would like some company asap and I'm betting you'll get some responses.
Of course then you'll have to screen! 
Seriously I'm sorry this happened to you, it shouldn't have gone down like that!
xoxo,
Steph
Our time is very important too and NCNS is just flat out rude. Unless she got hit by a bus and in coma in the hospital or something like that, she has access to email phone text so there's really no reason to make a simple friggin call saying "Sorry I can't make it"
This ncns bs is rude! Don't feel bad about not being able to write a review about it though. I had a guy book a 3 hour appt. He was a preferred 411 member. I rented a hotel (in my area hotels are $250 and up unless you want bedbugs) paid for parking, his favorite drinks etc. He confirmed appt day of before I would book hotel. NCNS. I wanted to put it on his 411 profile to warn others. They said no (can only document if I met him). TER isn't the only one with that rule. Rude and no excuse but it does happen. We can post that the incident happened on the provider board here on TER but we can't mention any names. Have to describe and say pm me if you want more info.