TER General Board

You can't justify behaviour by what you think someone MIGHT have done. eom
frankie2003a 1957 reads
posted


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LARRYWALL6509 reads

Recently I was visting a young lady.  Things were going along quite well.  We we were in the doggy position.  I had not cum yet, but I had 10 minutes to go.  Her service had not called. She said time was up, and insisted I pull out then.  I told her I needed a few more minutes and banged away for 5 minutes till I came.  Should I have pulled out?  Should I have pulled out and asked for a refund?  I expereinced this twice when I was younger with one-nighters I had picked up. They came, and then wanted me to stop because of a fear of getting pregnent.  I did, because I knew they would finish me orally.  Have others experienced this problem?

Diminished Capacity3261 reads

If you banged away w/out permission = rape.

Troll by larrywall/lawyer rail or rally.

-- Modified on 1/3/2005 3:19:56 PM

I wonder how many minutes you "banged away", as you so poetically put it, before she decided to call it quits.  Stop means stop pea brain.

From the description, it would seem that the provider was going to short-change him.  Now, assuming that is indeed the case (i.e., that the guy had 10 minutes to go on the hour), what if he pulls out and she won't refund the money...or any part of it?  Is that fair?  I mean, how different is this, really, than a provider who says, One Hour for XXX dollars, but then finishes you up in 10 minutes and tosses your ass out?  There is some similarity, you must admit?  So, should this guy have pulled out and asked for refund?  Yes.  Is it rape to have finished up (assuming he is telling the truth and it was 5 minutes, leaving him five to go on the hour)?  Not sure.  Ok, you can all wade in and call me a jerk, now.....  MA

But I am on the fence on this one. The gentleman that started the thread should have asked the lady's permission to finish in her. I have had similar situations and have always asked permission before continuing, it has been granted in all but a few cases, although I was sometimes asked how long to the finish before getting permission to finish.

I do not agree with the tone set by the posters that considered the gentlemen a jerk for wanting to finish. The immediate minutes or seconds before an orgasm provide some of the most intense physical sensations that a person can experience. It is possible that the gentleman lost control of himself and continued when he should not have. From what I understand from reading, CADs or rapists take a more studied approach to their violation of a lady, the gentlemen's conduct does not rise to that level, IMHO.

I would have stopped immediately if asked. But I'd never call her again and would have complained to the agency. How bad is it for business to stop the client ahead of time and not let him finish. I'm not saying go over the time but if it's a matter of minutes and the time isn't up yet, stopping the guy shows no regard for him receiving maximum pleasure from the session.

Jadie2035 reads

It is unclear how long he was pounding the lady.  I don’t think it is reasonable to expect a lady to endure 60 minutes of pounding in a one hour appointment.  If he action got started late in the appointment it is just as much his fault for not moving faster.  Yes, when ask he should have pulled out and it is not worth asking for a refund (how much is 10 min worth??).  My only response would been not to tip her or see her again.

Diego Rivera3250 reads

Gotta agree with the Aussie egghead on this one.  Actually, her advice is on the mark almost all the time.  It is situations like this why a lot of woman can't stand men, not only hobbyists, in general.

boutique2575 reads

With all due respect, whether you are in a hobby or civvie situation, if a woman asks or tells you to stop, then stop.  Immediately.  As she was a date booked through an agency, call them to complain about her cutting the appointment by 10 minutes.  If they are a good agency they will take care of the financials (for example, give you a discount for another session with a different girl).  As an agency owner, I can tell you that whenever clients call with complaints like that about girls I fire them and offer the client a free hour with a girl of his choosing.  When I first started out I did have a few complaints of that kind.  I have since restricted my hiring and the number of girls with whom I work as a result.

If, however, I had a girl who told me that after she told a client to stop and he didn't, even if there was time left on the clock, I would NEVER book another girl with him, and I certainly wouldn't give him a reference for another agency or indie.  But she would still be fired for cutting his appointment short.

Lex Luethor3105 reads

my home life! Unsatisfactory sex, no call from the service... it all fits! Are you 100% certain that you you weren't having sex with the Mrs. and just had a senior moment?

Every now and then I slip up and hand my wife an envelope with $300 in it... Oh boy! The looks I get after that.

Didn't you read her ad! Your supposed to sit it on the table not hand it to her. No wonder she gave you the hard look's.

... is when she gives you $50 change.

How can one be so stupid, If the lady said to stop, she means stop, not let me have another 5-minutes to cum.  Jerks like you give us honest hobbiest a bad name.  If you wanted to cum, pull it out and finish yourself off, while she is ramming a dildo up your arse for 10-minutes.

Sorry, Larry, I think you blew it.

I'm having trouble thinking of all the ways that continuing in this situation offends me. Not the most important of these, but still interesting however, is the wonder that anyone would consider "pounding away" until completion in these circumstances to be fun. Any of you who have read my earlier posts know I've been very moved by the respect for providers shown by most of the guys on these boards and in the reviews. I'll admit it has been much more pervasive than I would have guessed. So let's be honest, is it rape to continue under these conditions? I don't know. But it sure as hell is crude and oaffish and completely inconsistent with the mutually respectful and sensitive relationships that I think we all want to foster. If the lady was not being fair, that's her problem; it doesn't justify abandoning respect for her expressed wishes.

It sounds like someone who has never "banged" anyone.

Next time just JO, you can bang all you want and its free!

PLEASE!

The problem with all such posts is the lack of complete information.  Based on what is described, what this fellow did woudl qualify as rape in pretty much every state of the Union (even those Red States).  However, what he does not indicate is whether the woman assented to the continued act, what was her reaction to his "banging" and/or what she said or did thereafter.  I tend to agree with most posters that if the facts are as stated, the man should have stopped.  And the provider might want to tell her friends not to see him.  If she consented, then the hobbyist should say so if for no reason other than to make sure he doesn't end up blacklisted (or worse).

Maybe "things were NOT going along quite well".  I cannot imagine an experience I have had with a provider which would end like this.  I am slow to climax and have found myself asking the provider if it was too much for her.  Twice I could not cum!  The response was a look of defeat as if they failed!  In other words, the chemistry and dare I say "trust' was there---but I never pounded away--at least I hope not.  I suspect the provider did not like you and wanted you to leave asap.  You might have been hurting her.  Did you think to ask?

Autumn6665150 reads


you sound like a client I'd never want to have, it sounds like you have no sensitvity at all, nor any comprhension of your own sensuality. do you just 'pound'  women until you figure out you're done ? why not pound a blow up doll ?

and if someone says stop you stop. what are you trying to get out of this group by asking that question ? something like 'is it ok if  just keep fucking her even if a woman says stop' ?

I think that she was being nice to you, perhaps nicer than you deserve.

Aut.

WebTerrorist5445 reads

(In a couple of replies to this thread attempts were made at defense, and in the interest of space I would like to reply to those in this post as well, instead of making multiple replies.)

If I may be so bold as to ask a few questions.

It was stated that there were ten minutes left in the session.
Seems to me that figure might be a bit subjective.

-In an hour session when does the hour start and when does it finish?
Does it begin when the "hobbyist" arrives, and ends when he leaves?
Does the timer start at errection and stop at ejaculation?
Is the session begun when there is contact with the penis, and finished when parts are no longer adjoining?
-Whose dime is the time to get undressed, etc. before, and get cleaned up, dressed and out the door after?


There also was the issue of "finishing" and the implication of being "short-changed" or deserving a full or partial refund.

-Do not all of the providers state that it is their time that is being paid for?
If it is the completion and not the time then it would follow if a hobbyist is done in the first fifteen minutes then the "hour"  would be over.
Conversely, if it not the completion but the time, then just because a hobbyist has not finished does not mean the "hour" runs long.


Now to the more disturbing and detestable issue.
"Banging away" after she insited you stop.

Some defense has been offered that perhaps in those last minutes he lost control and couldn't stop:  So caught up in the moment he stopped checked his watch or a clock, and decided he could finish without her consent before the ten minutes when the exact hour would be up?

There has also been some efforts to say this could not be considered rape.
Why not? She insited he stop, and he refused, and finished anyway.
Would it be different if she had told him to stop for another reason?
Would it be different if she said no "greek" but once he was behind her he did that anyway?
Once he is in, is he then allowed to do whatever he wants?
Is it ok because he was in the heat of the moment (that's the date rape defense)?
Is his desire to finish in her more important than her insistances?
Would it be different if she weren't a provider?
Does her profession give her less right to say with whom, what and when things will start and stop?

He used her simply a means to an ends, despite her insting he stop.
His actions showed no respect for her, or her wishes.
He controlled her and the situation, and finished without her consent.

How is that not rape again?
Because it wasn't premeditated?
Because he didn't hold a weapon to her to make her finish?
Because he had paid for it?

Perhaps if he can't take being told when to stop, or can't respect that he is with a human being that has the right to tell him to stop, he would be better suited for a blow-up doll, and not a provider.

I'm sure you don't need answers to the questions you've posed.

"So caught up in the moment he stopped checked his watch or a clock, and decided he could finish without her consent before the ten minutes when the exact hour would be up?"
What else is there to say?!?

All of those lame attempts to justify...
: P

If I say stop
you should stop
If you wish to go on ask and if need be say why
otherwise scroll up and stop
though personaly it would not be because my alarm clock went off
there are more reasons than time that we ladies need you guys to either slow down or stop but no matter why we need and or want you to do so if you proceed then it is a major sign of disrespect and pretty much a gaurantee that no matter how much I may have enjoyed the gentleman up to that point that it is not likely I would ever see him again

Anonymous Period.1634 reads

"They came, and then wanted me to stop because of a fear of getting pregnent.'  Do you use protection?  

It does sound like rape to me, if you did not comply with her wishes of pulling out.  You could have called the agency and riled on about her 'service', if the agency is an honorable one, they would compensate you in some way, perhaps as some have said a discount on your next booking.  

My response if it were ever to happen to me would be to pull out and call the agency.  

AD.

LARRYWALL2538 reads

As I'm the "offender"  let me clarify.  She abrubtly asked me to pull out because of time, not discomfort.  When she asked I told her I had 10 minutes.  She did not argue, or continue any type of further objections.  If she would have objected any further I would not have been able to maintain a woody.  I tried to manage the clock.  I arrived as asked at 7:30.  That's when I considered the clock to have started.  As the session began she asked me to perform  oral sex on her, which was a first for me.  I did so gladly for around 20 minutes. This provider was simiply making an unfair business decesion.  She did not indicate she was sore or uncomfertable.

...  Suppose she was hurting?

In any case, stop means stop right now.  I'm a guy and I know you have not lost control of yourself so much that you can't stop.  

You should, at the least, apologize.

Harry

jHammrLoo1925 reads

Does he deserve these condemnations in Kangaroo Court? Without all facts presented could we be blinded by Larry's simple account on what was happening in that date? Must my Jerrry Falwell subconscience explode now? LarryWall, you animal!

...  Why don't you put LarryWall's behavior in a better light for all of us?  

It's his account.  I responded to it.  If you want to defend him -- do it.  I am no lawyer or expert on social norms.  I can't think of a way to explain what happened in a better light.  If you can, tell us.    

If I was Jerry Falwell, I wouldn't be posting on this board.    

Another "nameless" attack.

Harry

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