She appears to somewhat conflicted over moving into a relationship. Think about the personal things that she told you during the first meeting, the clue to your dilema probaly is in that information. I recently met a provider that was going through the after effects of a divorce from a man that she had grown to dispise as a person. Even those she was very nice and I felt that she should one day meet a man and try marriage again, she was very honest in saying that the emotional baggage that she was carrying would make that impossible.
In October I saw a really gorgeous 28 yr. old agency provider in Boston. We played and then because I needed time to recover (Late 40's) we talked a lot and really hit it off. I told her I'm very recently divorced and she told me personal stuff that was clearly true because there was no benefit in making it up. When I went to leave she said she was going on vacation and then gave me her email and cell phone and said "call me and we'll go out and do something when I get back". I had to go on a biz trip the week she was back and told her when I got back home from that I would. I gave her my email, too. When I got home that same night there was an email saying how sweet I was, how much she enjoyed meeting me and liked me, etc. I'm very new to the hobby (August 04) and in the intervening 2 weeks I wondered if this was SOP or if I were reading things wrong in a big way. When I got in late Sunday night I emailed her and asked if she was working the next day and if so I wanted to come in and see her. She replied saying "Yes! I can't wait to see you!" I went in and she grabbed me and we were into it. We talked a lot afterward and I asked if I had misread her (No dating experience in last 30 yrs.) the last time and did she want to see me for a social date type thing? She said absolutely. As I paid her she kissed me and said "this is the last time you'll ever pay me." I called her cell a couple of times and got voicemail. I emailed and she got back to me and said let's meet centrally and have dinner. (She lives about 40 miles from me.) Then she canceled. We emailed back and forth, very friendly, trying to set another time and I finally figured out she was stalling. The last email she sent said "let me look at my schedule and I'll get back to you." That was 3 weeks ago and I haven't heard from her and haven't emailed her. My questions are: 1. Has this sort of thing happened to other guys? 2. From the provider perspective, what would be her motivation to do this? (It seems to have gone way beyond enhancing the customer experience.) If she was really attracted to me it certainly wasn't because I'm a sexual athlete or a handsome devil or young or rich. At first I was flattered and now I'm very confused. With a little distance, I've started to think what she did was kind of cruel. The only thing I can think of is she's reluctant to say 'Look, I'm impulsive and I shouldn't have done this.' Again, I've been out of circulation for so long I don't know what to make of this, plus I've only seen about 10 providers in my life, all in the last four months. I know she's OK because she's been working according to the agency website and some (stellar)December reviews. I've thought about booking through the agency and asking her what's what but I don't want to embarass her or me or pay $300 to find out. Does anyone else have any experience with this sort of thing?
She is clearly deeply and passionately in love with you, and just testing you at this point. I would probably count on spending the rest of your life with this lady, who is sure to call you any minute now..... Oh, and the winning lottery ticket is in the top, left drawer of your bureau. MA
Been doing this for over 3 decades. Been there, done it. While I'll probably get drubbed for saying this, many providers are very impulsive. They love the idea of "true love" but live in the moment and either choose not to enage in are are not capable of long term planning or commitment. The very attributes of providing that are attractive to them -- the thrill, the danger, the instant gratification of meeting someone with whom it clicks -- are the very things that make a long-term relationship, with depth and resonance, difficult or impossible.
I stress that this is not true of all providers. But it is true of a lot.
Move on.
Some people who love sex decide to stay unattached to avoid getting into a situation where they will ultimately have to lie to a person that they vow fidelity to.
Well, I don't buy lottery tickets and I wasn't trying to suggest that she was nuts about me. I was curious if she was just nuts. I was curious if anyone else had a similar experience, customer or providers, and maybe had a theory.
As Turkana says, she's impulsive as are many of us guys too. Sometimes we have to learn the hard way. Fantasy is always better than reality. In my case I think I'm just too kind and romantic and sometimes it's taken the wrong way.
She appears to somewhat conflicted over moving into a relationship. Think about the personal things that she told you during the first meeting, the clue to your dilema probaly is in that information. I recently met a provider that was going through the after effects of a divorce from a man that she had grown to dispise as a person. Even those she was very nice and I felt that she should one day meet a man and try marriage again, she was very honest in saying that the emotional baggage that she was carrying would make that impossible.
It sounds as though she was reacting on impulse and later had second thoughts.
Something that happened to me with the first provider I ever saw but with a different twist. We hit it off and at the end of our first session gave me her pager number and told me "call my pager not the agencyI'll give you a discount." also made a remark like we should hang out. Called her a week later for another session. She got there and I handed her the donation she said, "Why you giving me $200.00?" I tell her that's what the donation was last time. She wet on to say, thats the normal donation but, you don't to pay next time. Then after the session she started talking about how we should go get our picture taken together so, I could show off my new girlfriend. I cut it off there too freaky for me. I guess the point I'm trying to make is, move on.