The only things that I agree with are:

Dont suck or lick the urethra (The place where we pee from, just below the clit).  That is VERY irritating and uncomfortable.

And dont roughly suck on her clit.  She is right.  Pretend the clitoris is a rose.  It is delicate.  Dont destroy it or try to suck it off or bite it.  SOFT is the word of the day.  

The other stuff is just BS.  A very angry, jaded, worn out (and stupid) provider.  Theres no reason a provider has to get overworked like that.  If she was that great, she could set her prices to a level that she could see just 1 or 2 clients a day, make a killing, and go home cheerful.

She makes some very good points and really like the way she packaged it up.

The only thing that makes me roll my eyes and think "typical ho" is her reference to tips.

I am sure the board manginas and sappy hobbyists are going to object to a few points since their fragile egos are going to take a beating again.

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with too much time on her hands (I wonder why)

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Damn I really feel like shit after reading that.

Hilarious read. THank you for sharing! That's one NCNS that I'm glad happened (so that it enabled this working girl to write this funny piece).

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That's something to send out in a first email contact!!

HA.. priceless

Did she just mention truck stops ???!!

I just complained about this on the New Jersey Board.

I did find a beaut who's review is going through.

...... she DID give disclaimer it wasn't sugarcoated so pick your balls up like a man read it, take it in and enjoy the ride.   Some of it was pardon my slang "real shit", some of it was downright angry and some of it was downright f***ing funny.

If you took any of it too personally that's your problem isn't it?

Don't be mad especially if it's not referring to you.

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I find what works best, for mish in any case, is for the guy to lightly hover over the area while the gal takes the penis in hand and guides it to the whole.

I find it very erotic, and it solves the banging around issue.

After all, we can't see there, and with the cover on, it's like trying to grope your way around unfamiliar territory without glasses.

I'm at a loss for words!!  I can think of a few, but, why bother!!

I gave myself a 1/2 for 6 items.  A few things I disagree with: 1) finish up quick and leave early, thats the deal I get from my right hand for free 2) no hair on the genitals ? I wish I had the guts to save my balls and shaft, let's work out a separate donation for that 3) sorry for holding you legs over your head, it's one of my favorites, I'll keep it short, and you can take off a point 4) NO O FOR YOU !?!?!, same as number 2, I get that deal from my right hand AND my left hand 5) if you don't want me falling for you than stop treating me so nice.6) and for Christ sake if I'm at the wrong spot - JUST TELL ME, point if necessary, diagrams are helpful, 40 fucking year and that the first time someone drew me a map, I'm a man, we like maps !!

Some true. Some false. 100% entertaining. lol xD

Hmmm I was really excited because I found out this provider I've really wanted to see is going to be available when I make a trip to her area next week.  BUT, after reading that article, it makes me not want to meet up at all lol, ever.  The cleanliness points seem common sense to me, but it makes you wonder just how bitter providers are in general.  I totally realize that I wouldn't be able to meet 9's and 10's without p4p, but come on, if you hate your job that much I'd just assume stay home.

...I saw this before, but it is always fun to read it again...great reality check for all.

Hello,

Yea, I read it... nothing in there that I haven't heard before. It's more of an anti-hobbyist rant than anything else.

Don't misunderstand me, I know there are some idiots out there, who don't do the right things, that makes us hobbyists, who are doing the right things, look bad.

I can say the same things about providers who have done lousy service versus the ones that do give good services. It goes both ways...

Therefore...

In reference to your question...

What am I supposed to guess?

Serpius

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What an unsalted provider - why bother? I've found maybe three of four who seem to share some of my interests. Nothing would be worse than a bad fit, except a total burn-out. OTOH, I can understand how a conceited client could cause exasperation for a long-suffering provider.

My god woman, get the fuck out of prostitution if you hate men so much.

Anybody see that viral photo of a lion trying to eat a cute baby with a zebra striped coat on through the glass cage?  Its called instinct.  Even though that lion has probably been in that cage and explored its boundaries often, and KNOWS it cannot get though that glass wall, when presented with its prime stimulus (a tasty baby zebra) the left brain shuts down and it wants to eat, irregardless of everything it knows about that glass wall.

So now comes along a beautiful women, who proudly sells her excellent reviews and prides herself on her "exceptional service", and proceeds to tear into men for their ingrained responses to sexual stimulus.

We are animals.  200+ millions of years of evolution made us the way we are.  Our socially evolved brains can overcome some of the instinctual impulses at times, but in the end, when you wave red meat in front of a carnivore, don't bitch that you get bit once in a while.  

If you don't want that experience, don't advertise yourself as a sex goddess that wants to please men, and then gripe when they are trying to do things to stimulate you.  If you are charging a premium price for your booty, we don't give a rats ass that you are sore, because we don't think you should be selling damaged goods.  If we wanted to have sex with a hooker that is getting drilled like a pin cushion and feels like it, we can find that experience for a 10th of what you are charging.

When we pay premium dollars for your company, we are paying for a total experience, we are not paying to get ourselves off.  We can jack off to porn for free if that's all we are looking for.  Total experience means both parties are into the sexual experience.  

That's why we are trying to make you cum, it makes us fell sexually virile.  Its as important to us as it is to you to primp and look beautiful for your friends and strangers.  You know that dopomine rush that goes through your cranium when someone compliments you for something... that is the experience we get when a woman responds to our touch.  It is what makes paying for sex with someone that acts like its fun, but you really know underneath either disrespects or detests you and wouldn't give you the time of day if we were not in the presence of dead presidents palpable.

Its so funny how some guys on here are calling her bitter, mad, washed up etc and some women are in total disagreence with her... TAKE HEED! these are real concerns! Aside from a few things like the tipping although I agree since we are providing a service, and the gifts that I feel only maybe a returning client should bring if he KNOWS that his provider is going to ROCK his world or he has a genuine connection with. After all WE ARE STILL WOMEN! And basicslly at the end of the day all she is basically saying is we want to be treated the same way you would want to be treated just in her own spin of things.... I figure if you disagree with her turn the tables around and picture yourself on the other side how would you want to be treated/handled? Or maybe you are not guilty of any of these things she speaks of, well I APPLAUD THE FUCK OUT OF YOU!! LOL alot of men dont care! Not saying you dont but if this was your business and it was being mishandled or vandalized im pretty sure you would have a whoooooole lot to say, you'll be ready to go to the media probably all the way up to the mayor to get it straightened out right? Boys dont get offended she's just being honest and giving insite on what really goes on behind closed doors and actually helping in a humerous, but patronizing way! and well if you see more providers that agree well you gotta wonder if there's some truth behind it and actually be on OUR side and make things a bit more comforting...just saying You gotta love opinions though

While I will admit there is some humor in this, what really stands out is how much she hates what she is doing. Since she admits to seeing 10 or more guys a day and working for an agency, not only does she not enjoy her work, she is apparently working long hours.

I would suggest that she look for a new career. I have always advised people, especially young people, to find a job they enjoy. I can not imagine working very long at something I did not enjoy doing. If I woke up every morning and thought "Damn, I have to go to work and I hate that job", I would look for a new job. The average person spends 35% to 50% of there waking hours at work. It must be very depressing if they hate what they do. I know everybody has to do what it takes to make a living, but I still can not see spending that much time doing something you don't enjoy.

Actually, the urethra, where women pee from, is located just inside the vaginal wall, along the top...no where near the clit.... guys will more-so hit the urethra when searching for the g-spot with their finger, lol.

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LOL thanks now I don't have to read it all. I saw a picture of hand washing, I do that so I assume I do all the other stuff right as well. I aint reading the rest.

I think you have wonderful manners.

don't expect a lot. Wash your azz, wash your balls, don't slobber, be polite and not loaded, and don't short us. That's all. Oh, and good daty always gets you a discount on a future visit..I'm just sayin.

It's the worst of the worst of the worst scenario...not the typical day-in-the-life.  Just good for a laugh.  

Kinda like Martha Focker farting in a guy's face or arffing on him from a BJ after feeding her a big meal.  LOL

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I mean it's not the guy's fault the damn hotels only give us 3 of each towel even if we are there for a damn week! It's more than obvious if you are going through that many damn towels you are doing more than taking your make-up off with them. Solution..bring your own!

At most I see 2 guys a day and that is only when I tour, but even then I need more towels. You have to consider that every guy you see might want to take a shower, and so forth. I just started bringing my own face towels and only bother the maids for the big ones.

Still...it is a bit annoying when one guy uses 3 clean towels to wipe the same d*ck that is not the size of a truck lol.

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Urine is sterile, but I still put some lube on him to get rid of any potential pee taste.  And I rinse with Listerine after each visit...and may take a sip of Vodka after 5pm.  LOL

Guys, if you really like a girl, please wipe your weenie after you pee if you're going to stick it in her mouth.

Thank you!!  =))

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One would think some common sense, thoughtfulness, and courtesy would just pop up without asking.  However, if  Julia feels a need to mention wiping up after peeing,  then too many guys are just being just plain inconsiderate.

I will teach you about mine soon.  =)  xoxo

Dont feel like shit.

Thats how unhappy people want you to feel.  The writer of that page is clearly miserable.  If you sneezed in the bathroom, she'd probably blog about how you're sickly and diseased and guys shouldn''t come see her while they're sick.

About the hood, yes, stay above it.  Right below the clit (but above the vagina), is not an arousal zone for the woman.  Its just where we pee from.  If you accidently lick it, fine, but dont concentrate on licking the urethra or you'll get angry escorts blogging about you.

by any means, but it does highlight those certain things that several guys do at one time or another. If the ONLY thing you have ever done was misfire on the hood thing, I would say you are doing pretty good lol. This is a business and you don't have to be Prince Charming when you're the one paying. Respect and common sense is all that is required in most cases. I wonder why she did not touch on guys who can't freaking read though! That pisses me off to no end!

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If you pull my "hood" back and lick me, it feels better than above the hood.  Just don't try to clean my floor or suck the c out of my lit.  That hurts!  And facial stubble rubbed on my "flower" hurts!  Be clean shaven or don't rub all over me.   LOL

Every woman is different.  

we are talking about two different things.

Im talking about, I dont want the guy trying to make me have an O by licking the crap out of my urethra.  I will NEVER cum like that but he WILL get punched in the throat.

I think you are saying that you like an upwards licking rather than downward.  Which I can understand.  Yes, different women like different things.  But I doubt you like a guy trying to stick his tongue in your pee hole!!!

She just pissed me off on a good day.

for once I can't take credit for this masterpiece lol.

LMAO... so dead on! I remember the 1st time touring, having no idea about the towel situation & after ONE appointment, had 2 towels left... he had used 2 washcloths, 2 hand-towels & 1 big towel!! Now, when I go on tour, I put all the towels away, except for one of each, & the next morning when housekeeping comes, they take the dirty one's & I get clean ones... HIDING the towels had helped greatly & I never run out anymore!!

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.... but were "just checking" things out for accuracy....even though you couldn't have laid things out more simpler.  *side eye*.

It is actually a good humor she posted. Good laugh I can get now that I think about it.

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Many comics are not happy people.

thing EVER. She is right on the money with that. Not every vagina will expand to fit your weenie. I always draw them a map too, because I know how much you boys hate asking for directions bwahahah!

The next time you need to pee, angle a mirror between your legs and you'll see that the stream comes out of your body through a tiny organ called the urethra.  It is just below your clit on the outside of your body.

The urethra is not located inside the vagina.

I think you're thinking about the bladder.  

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point you are making, so I am not completely sure I get your major theme.  I get the rest of what you are saying, and don't have fundamental differences, except:

1) I am a mature, successful, articulate, intelligent man.  I don't appreciate being patronized to by anyone, let alone someone feeling sorry for themselves.  

2) I treat every one except neo nazis, morons, and Rush Limbaugh fans (but I repeat myself) with respect.  This woman, and those like her don't reciprocate.  Fundamentally, the thinking expressed in the blog reflects an opinion that men are chumps to be tooled with.   As I said in my post on this thread, I wholly object to the notion of being sold on premium, WORLD ROCKING as you say sexual experience, and then show up and be told "Don't touch me there, I am sore.  Quit trying to get me off, I don't give a fuck.  Can't you get done sooner,  don't you realize what a hassle it is to get condoms?(no, I don't.  I have no trouble dropping into CVS and buying a box of 16), I  need to do my nails for the next john, etc, etc, etc., "  If that qualifies for WORLD ROCKING sexual experience, I might as well content myself with masturbation.

At least not a "proper" word that one would think a self-proclaimed "mature, successful, articulate, intelligent man" such as yourself would be tossing about.

from. I was like, gosh what a freakin moron you have been licking my pee hole this entire time..how does it taste?

I know where the urethra is, & is it NO where near the clit... maybe different women's bodies are made differently. On my body, mine is right by the opening of my vagina....my clit is up much higher... I've had a catheter before & remember exactly where they inserted it, & again, it was no where near my clit... But again, women are built differently, so maybe some have a closer space between the 2 than others??

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who commented on this thread.  You included.  I am using a writing style to address the blogger directly as a less personally confrontational way to address those that agree with her.

I am sorry if you are the most perfect client that every hooker dreams of meeting and never has ANY complaints about, but many guys we see are in fact as clueless as she stated. It's very easy to simply say she is washed up or jaded, but the fact is the next girl who you pay to pretend to like you might feel the very same way and you will never know it lol. It's called acting. Just sayin. Fact is you would not know who is "thinking" what because most of the women on boards tend to kiss ass and say what all you boys want to hear...well not me, but I don't feel the need to sugarcoat anything. You act as if this girl is so miserable...she is probably not. From what she stated if it is accurate, 10 pages of reviews and nothing less than a 9 in looks sounds like she is pretty damn good at what she does...putting that happy face on for her faux dates that day.

This is a fantasy last time I checked, so if you're naive enough to think every hooker loves every guy she sees..think again. Some days are good, others are not so good. That is any job, so I find is so amusing how a hooker who complains about her day at work is the ONLY one who should get a new job lol. Why would she when she is running to the bank every day?

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and most of your response is to a strawman, not to what I said.

Sure what she says happens, and I get why hookers and civvies find it objectionable.  But again, that is not the point.  

The simple distillation of my objection to this blog is her attitude that her customers are cretins and imbeciles.  It is reflected  loud and clear in her statement  that "if we want to make her happy, pay her and leave".  That's nice work if you can get it.

who finds this hilarious feels the same way as her is projecting at best. It's FUNNY...end of story. And, yea babe I took Critical Thinking as a freaking freshman in undergrad too, so I know all of my fallacies. If I want to say something to you or about you, it won't be disguised. You can see my other posts if you have any doubt on that one lol.

Every time this blog is posted you boys yell and scream but why? Could it be that some of you do the very things that she touches on? Hate to break it to ya, but a very low percentage of men who pay for sex actually know what to do with a woman's body, nor do they much care if they physically hurt her. Guys on the boards not so much, because of threads like this clueing them in though.

You're still naive if you think many women you are with have never felt this way one time or another...not necessarily with you of course, but most have felt some form of abuse or anger at some point in their career. Saying "Oh, you should quit" is fkin retarded because you and every other person who has ever had a bad day at work could be told the same thing. No job is peaches and roses every day, and that's just a fact.

So, I did not miss your point in any instance as your words are in black and white to mock. You said she should get out of the business, she is just an angry hooker, bla, bla, bla. THAT is what I was commenting on.

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-- Modified on 5/6/2012 4:23:45 AM

-- Modified on 5/6/2012 4:24:39 AM

"The simple distillation of my objection to this blog is her attitude that her customers are cretins and imbeciles."

This from the guy who previously admits men are "animals" and can occasionally not control their instinctual nature to more or less gnaw upon and devour a woman's delicate parts like they are a freshly slaughtered carcass found in the middle of the African plains.

Interesting.

and irregardless of how smart you think you are, you are not convincing me of anything because you are not articulating it here and continue to attack straw men.

1) Your point about me being naive is irrelevant to my argument,  as I have not stated that woman do not feel as you and the OP have outlined.  There is no question that they do feel that way, and have those experiences and I have not suggested otherwise.  But again, that is not the point.

2) I am not saying she should quit because she has a bad day at work.  The litany of complaints in that post do not suggest it is a bad day at work issue, it is describing the horrible and detestable every day working experience of offering sex for cash (per the posters world view anyway).

I go back to her first paragraph. "Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for how the clients leave ME feeling".  She doesn't say some clients.  She doesn't say this happens sometimes.  I can't read her mind, maybe she does mean some, I can only go by what she stated, along with the context of the rest of the complaint specifics.

Lets go to another broad statement:

"How could I let these guys KNOW how TERRIBLE they are??? Let them know how to FIX themselves to make the experience less terrible for me?"

Again, she is swinging a globally wide brush here.  My parsing of those words, joined with the rest of the acerbic complaints in the post is that this is a horrible experience for her all the time.  And if that is the case, why do it?  That is why she should quit, and it has nothing to do with a bad day at work, because she isn't having a bad day, she is discussing a bad every day.

What is retarded is asking men to behave differently than our internal programming allows.  (Refer back to the red meat for carnivores in my OP).  Our sexual impulses make us want our sex partners to enjoy the experience (well, a majority of us anyway, there is that Neanderthal DNA lurking in there) and it is beyond stupid to stimulate that part of the brain and expect that the man is not going to respond.

Oh, and here is why I would give you an "F" in critical thinking.  In three responses to my post, you have not addressed one thing I stated in the first one where I state my objections other than the very first sentence.  You took that first sentence and made a treatise out of it, and are arguing against positions that I did not make.  As I keep saying, you are not arguing with me, you are arguing with a straw man of your own creation.

So yes, you do miss my point, as so far you have shown no evidence that you even read it.

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when you said, "She serves as a proxy for all women who feel that way including the ones who replied in this thread." That was not a broad statement on your part, but you flat out said everyone of us who dared to laugh at this crap, must feel the same way she does...projecting and far from accurate! Just because we think it's funny, does not mean we agree with all of what she said...it is still funny as all get out. If you think that those who responded with humor agree, then I could say the same for every guy who got all bent out of shape about it. So do you apply to what she said, because your rant certainly seems like it hit more than one nerve lol. Nuff said.

If I missed your point, maybe it's because you have yet to make one! All your first post did was put down any provider who had a bad day, exclaim she should get a new job, and so forth. There never was a freaking point to miss. There is no creation of a straw man, because YOU are right here still trying to convey a point that is freaking moot! Good lord.

Your first line about "My god woman get the fk out of prostitution of you HATE MEN SO MUCH" pretty much shows just how little you know. Providers don't "hate men" or we would not be taking your money...we just hate stupid men lol. Chew on that a bit, while I catch the last episode of Little House.

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-- Modified on 5/7/2012 8:31:28 AM

That is some strange sh*t lol. Mine is right under the hood.

You still have not shown any critical thinking ability, and you are still inventing points to knock down.

Lets just agree that we are not going to agree, and leave it at that.