I just started this "hobby" a month ago, but during that time I've had 11 appointments with 9 different providers (there have been a couple of repeats). One recent session was so terrible, however, it almost made me never want to do this again. I left the appointment extremely upset. Since it may have been at least partly my fault, I thought I'd get the opinion of other clients and providers.

The session happened with a provider who was visiting my city and has at least a couple dozen *very* positive reviews. I'm absolutely not going to reveal who it is, since I promised her I wouldn't, and it's not at all my point here to try to soil her reputation or affect her business. I made a 2 hour incall appointment with her a couple of days in advance, and it was my first session with her.

The first kinda odd thing that happened was when we were e-mailing each other to confirm the appointment, she was very adamant that I don't submit a review of her for the upcoming session. I know there are are providers who prefer to have very few or even no reviews, but this provider has over 20, most recent being a couple of months ago, and she even advertises her high review score for her region. So it puzzled me why she wouldn't want another review. I don't write reviews unless it's requested of me anyway, so I happily agreed not to post one.

On the day of our appointment, she asked that we move the time one half hour earlier. Although this made it inconvenient for me to arrive on time, I agreed. And she again re-iterated she didn't want me to post a review. When I arrived at the hotel lobby at the appointment time, she texted me that she was running late. She also asked whether I had brought any alcohol, and she was glad that I did in fact happen to bring some wine. About 20 minutes later she gave me the room number and said she was ready. (Made me wonder though why she wanted to meet earlier in the first place.)

After I entered her room, we exchanged pleasantries and I put down the envelope. She wanted to drink some wine right then, which was fine with me, so I opened the bottle. At first things seemed okay, though I perceived there was something "off" about her because she kept kinda nervously laughing. I'm extremely polite, laid-back, and have a clean-cut appearance, so I don't think she was nervous for her safety or anything like that.

I sometimes like to get a feel for whether the provider is comfortable with me before proceeding, so I basically asked whether she was with me. She mentioned something about not liking it when men don't shave their pubic hair. We were fully clothed at that point, so I thought it was a strange answer to my question. (I have no facial hair and my head hair is short.)

We finished some wine, then decided to begin the session. I tried to kiss her, but she wouldn't really reciprocate. (Later she said my breath was fine.) Again, I found that strange since all her reviews mention plenty of LFK/DFK. I definitely was starting to get the impression that she *really* didn't like me.

We nevertheless proceeded without kissing and got naked. She performed BBBJ, then suddenly jumped up and ran into the bathroom. She came back with a wet cloth and wiped my groin area. I asked what was wrong, and she complained about an "odor" due to the hair. Just before coming to the appointment, I had taken a very thorough shower and changed my clothes, so that surprised me. However, it's true that I don't shave my pubic hair. I'm blond and fair-skinned, and it just has never occurred to me since I'm not particularly hairy down there anyway.

I would have been happy to take another shower at that point, but she tried to continue. She got me hard again by giving me a HJ, then covered and immediately mounted me RCG to start. I thought that was a little strange too, but I tried to go with it. It was very mechanical, forced, and it was obvious she was trying to make me come right away. Since I felt really bad about the odor issue and weird about the situation, there was no way that was going to happen.  We briefly attempted another position, then she asked me to masturbate and come on her. I was feeling even more weird about everything at this point, so that didn't work either. She then tried to help out a bit, but by then I was losing my erection.

She then jumped out of the bed and yelled "I just can't do this anymore!" She grabbed her envelope, threw it at me, and started freaking out how I had better not post a review about her or otherwise bad-mouth her on TER because she gave me my money back. I mean she was *really* freaking out about the possibility of me posting about her, because she wants to retire soon (even though she's young) with a good review history.

I had absolutely NO intention of doing that, so I told her we should calm down, sit down, and talk about this. She sat down and I assured her I have no desire to hurt her business. She had tried to give me service, and that's all I can ask. Once I convinced her it was okay, she calmed down, and I attempted to find out what about me bothered her so much.

She said I had a "hygiene issue," mostly due to the fact that I didn't shave my pubic hair. Since I had told her I'm single, she said that only married men have an excuse not to shave there. (Makes me wonder, doesn't she have plenty of married clients?) She said all (single) men pretty much shave these days, and I should get with the times. She also said she didn't like my "cologne," which was weird since I don't even own any and never wear it. I had put on some regular deodorant and that's it.

I told her I try to practice impeccable hygiene, and that none of the other ladies seemed to have any problem with me at all. (Indeed, all of them said they would see me again, and some have.) She said that's because they only care about the envelope, but she's the only one who is being honest. She did admit that she was trying to get me to come as quickly as possible to get over with it.

In the end, I insisted she keep her donation, and I apologized for my apparent "issue."

Needless to say, I was quite upset, and after I left I e-mailed one of the providers who I had seen twice and mentioned I just had a terrible appointment. (That probably crossed the line to bother her, but we had gone out on a 4 hour dinner date and I felt we had developed a very good rapport.) She kindly called me later that night, and I told her the entire story as above. She said one thing she actually liked about me was my good hygiene, and she thought that the provider had issues and was basically FOS. She also said there was nothing unusual or unpleasant about my pubic hair or penis, but if there was, she'd be honest about it.

So my questions to the forum:

Is it expected that men shave their pubic hair? If so, I had no idea.

Also, does the provider's behavior before and during the session indicate there is something else going on here? It almost seemed like she knew it was going to be a bad session before even meeting me, since it was so important to her that I not post a review.

Or was this just a case of a provider not being into me at all, and this sort of thing just happens in this business occasionally?  

Maybe she was good when she was "into it" but now she is worn out and burned out and ready to change careers.    Her being young its very possible.

The majority of men's body washes say "Bodywash / Shampoo" - a friend of mine pointed out to me that they say that because men's bodies are hairy.

Anyway a good soapy shower - nice lather everywhere, should take care of any issues with odor.

Shaving is a personal choice,  who cares what someone else is doing.   There are plenty of providers who do not have an issue with the guy having pubic hair.

For whatever reason, she was having a bad day.  The scheduling issues you mentioned would indicate that she may have been juggling too many appointments or, at the very least, scheduling them too close together.  

As far as the shaving issue, I shave now but I didn't when I was married.  The vast majority of my time in the hobby was as a married man who showed up freshly showered or took a shower upon arrival.  No provider has ever complained about my not shaving, not even the few really bad ones that I have seen over the years.

As I said, this gal was having a bad day.  It's going to happen to you once in a while if you see a lot of new ladies.  

If you have hair on your balls, sorry I am not going to give them attention...don't care about hair at the top. Bottom line, is everyone's nose is different and more or less sensitive to smells. If she jumped off of you to get a towel in the middle of the action, odds are you did in fact smell like something she did not agree with. Did she handle the sitation right? NO! She should have let you take a shower or not perform at all and let you leave with the donation.

My guess is she was in a hurry to get rid of you so the shower would have taken up too much time for her to finish with you and move on to the next person, which is why she just tried to deal with it. Guys always think they are clean and many times they are simply still carrying an odor. Pee and hair do not mix, so unless you are carrying around baby wipes to wipe the tip of your weenie after EACH trip to the bathroom, it's very possible you smelled like urine.

cleanliness is next to horniness..a clean cock and balls are essential..i always do my ass crack twice too..you wouldnt want hair and leftovers on your plate when served a meal at a restaurant..basically you are serving them a tempting meal..let them enjoy it..

What she said pretty much explains it.

Quoting you:"She then jumped out of the bed and yelled "I just can't do this anymore!" "

The problem was not you it was her. You could have just stepped out of the shower and been smooth as a baby's butt and it wouldn't have mattered. Possibly she would have been able to handle it a little better but chances are it still wouldn't have been a good session.

Sounds as if she is burned out as a previous poster said and was trying to hang on for one more session and just couldn't.

I'm sure many will speculate as to why things were as they were with her but I'll leave it as you need to take it as one of those things that happens over which you had no control. Don't take it upon yourself that you did something wrong.

As for does everyone shave down there . Answer: No.
You'll get many answers to that question as everyone is different. I don't. I do keep it trimmed. Many providers on here have said they like it shaved. Many have said they don't mind a guy having pubic hair. They do want you very clean and smelling good. (I don't mean cologne).

Like the others, I don't see that you did anything wrong, it was her problem, not yours.  If she got that upset at me, I probably would not have tried to force her to keep the donation, but that's another story.  She was def having a really bad day.  For whatever reason, it seems she was not 'into you' as you put it, and was just grasping at anything to get you to leave.  From what you describe, your hygiene was acceptable, so who knows what set her off?  It sounds like things were off from the moment she told you she was running late, not a good sign.

As far as shaving the twig and berries, like London said, hairy balls are not going to get as much attention from providers as shaved ones.  When I first started hobbying, I did not shave, but after a time, and reading a lot of comments about it, I decided to go ahead and do it.  Many men, however, being married or with an SO, cannot shave lest the partner figure out what he is doing.  I'm single, have no SO, so it's not a problem for me.  One of my married hobby pals had to do some fast thinking and talking when the wifey asked about his being shaved down there.

Bottom line, chalk it up as a lesson, and move on.  That stuff does not happen regularly, it just wasn't your day.

Swim

Maybe she really smelled something. Maybe one of your references had something unflattering to say and she had a bad impression before you ever met. Maybe she just wasn't into you physically. Maybe she had a bad day. Maybe she's just a flake. Only she will ever know the truth with 100% certainty. Everyone here can only speculate.

From your version of the story, it sounds like you did nothing wrong. However, I'm sure her version would sound much different. I'm not accussing you of lying, it just happens that way with most stories. I suggest to take an honest look at yourself and if you feel like you did nothing wrong, then chalk it up to bad luck (YMMV) and move on.

I must say that the "no new reviews because I'm retiring" excuse makes no sense to me.

Here's a story about shaving. When I was in my 20's and in college, I worked as a bartender. A group of 8 female friends showed up where I work for "girls night out". I had slept with one of them recently and they were talking about me right in front of me. I used to have the gorilla bush down there. Let's just say after that night, I've been closely trimmed or shaved for the last 15 years. Every one of them told me to at least keep that shit closely trimmed. Now, I keep it close on a daily basis (in case I get lucky) and shave completely when I have a paid date or regular one scheduled.

Lastly, the review. I'm not saying you should or shouldn't write one. It's a personal choice IMO. However, keep this in mind. If you had seen 3 or 4 reviews similar to your experience BEFORE seeing this lady ... would you still have seen her???

While London has a point on the bathroom thing, I really doubt that was the issue. I agree with Naomi and xyz. This lady is burned out or sonething. She just didn't want to be there. Right from the beginning there were issues. They would have been easy to overlook if the session had turned out great. But in hindsight, after everything went down the way it did, you can see flags from the beginning. The email insisting on no reviews even though she already has a lot of great reviews, moving the appointment earlier, then being late herself, asking you for alcohol, discusding pubic hair before you even dropped your pants.  It's like she knew it was going to be a bad session, before it ever started and she just wanted to get through with it.

On the plus side she did give you your money back (even if you did return it to her) Personally, I would have kept it. (Maybe given her 50 or 100).

As for the shaving, that's a personal thing. It is up to you if you want to do it or not. Many ladies will give your balls a lot more attention if they are smooth. But a lot of ladies don't care, and I have even seen a lady's website, where she specifically asks men not to shave down there. It obviously wasn't an issue for the first 9 girls you saw. So it's up to you how to proceed going forward.

Speaking of 9 girls, I agree with hiddenhills. You might be setting yourself up for burn out (or bankruptcy). You might consider easing up a bit, but hey it's your money and your life.

Good luck.

This stunk (pardon the pun) from the very beginning.  You did nothing wrong.  She has obvious issues.  But I must say you handled it great and were more than accomdating to her.  I agree with the others...I think she's just burned out or thought she could "do this" for a living and couldn't.

I hope she figures it out before her next appointment.

i have found out in my journies, their are some real nut cases out there!!!

Let me say this first,  I am SO sorry you had to go through this!
I am sure it was NOT you ! Don't let this one girl ruin anything about your hobby - you sound like a wonderful man and i would lick you from head to toe xo
-
Is there a chance this was NOT the girl you thought she was?
Everything you write sounds like she is keeping something secret
wanting no reviews
rescheduling earlier, then not ready
asking for a drink first  -
totally nervous behavior
not wanting to kiss, making all kinds of excuses for everything-
Did you verify by photos it was her?
I may be Totally wrong here, but had to put it out there-
Kinda sounds like another girl took the place of the girl you thought you were booking!
Off the wall ? Ya, maybe but could it be she was a friend of the provider  and she is new in the business, OR maybe this provider shares a number ?
Whether she is or not, Don't take what happened personal,  you sound like you did everything right by my standards, and some girls have their bad days -  Not your fault!
Go see someone else soon to wash away this yuk with another girl that will curl your toes and take you to ecstasy! XO Good luck bb

This is exactly my problem with "Newbies must see well reviewed providers" statute that everyone throws around.  I'd rather have a less reviewed provider then someone who has been there done that with dozens if not hundreds of other clients.  Well reviewed in the past isn't means nothing for the present.

I have met with at one or 2 loony providers myself and she sounds like one of them....LOL

As far as shaving.....The first month of my hobby experiences I had pubic hair. Noticed some of the reviews of girls I had seen and many said she gave lots of attention to the boys but I only got a little. Then I got the idea I would clean shave and was the best idea yet. From then on my boys were getting handled,groped and sucked on by all the girls. Also had more than one mention to me how they love it shaved as the hair does hold some odor in and they hate hair in their mouth. But don't get me wrong....not all girls feel that way just some that have talked with me about it. I know once you get the initial shaving done it's easy to maintain and there is no going back for me.

First, I do travel with a small toiletries bag...  including personal wipes.  Even though I shower before leaving home, part of my preappointment ritual is to clean front & rear to be sure.  I make a point to wash my hands throughly...  if only because of every door handle & light switch we might touch enroute to her door.

Most men are not fully shaved, though some shaving & trimming is generally considered good grooming.  I don't think it was the issue in your case but, depending on what you eat, etc, one might have strong smelling urine.  Proper cleansing should take care of it.   My lady friends have always complimented me on being nice & clean...  and I aim to keep that reputation.    

I don't think this was on you.  I think she was having a bad day / week / bad client previous / what ever, or perhaps burnout.  She showed her phobia before you even started to undress.   It happens.  SHE should reflect & if she's not up for the work, she should cancel.  I find no fault with you.  Frankly, I find you were a gentleman & both kind & generous.  

I had a Fav melt down on me...  took an upsetting call from a family member...   The appointment went on the back burner while I comforted her.   A half hour or more later, I made a move for the bathroom (honestly, I needed to go but was considering departing) but she insisted in completing the appointment even though I could tell her head was not fully in it.    
HV

If you want a girl to totally enjoy you then it would be a good idea that u shave or trim dont have to go bald but take the clippers to it and shorten it. If I get a hair in the back of my throat its over! Ur cock looks bigger with less hair. If you want all of him to get wet then make sure there is no hair gettin in the way. Besides hair holds bacteria which causes odor.

You sound like a very nice gentleman. I'm shocked I could never treat someone that way.  If she wants to retire she should retire. You are so cool I would have written a review anyway...Your time is just as important as ours!

Quote:

Thanks for your insight, London. I probably did pee once between my shower and the appointment. It never occurred to me to carry around baby wipes for that contingency, so I'm not sure there was anything I could have done about it. I'm not disputing she probably smelled something, but I doubt it would have been a good session regardless. I could tell she was already turned off before we even got that far because she wouldn't kiss me. (But she did say later that my breath was in fact minty fresh.)

Suffice to say before my next appointment, I'm gonna shave down below AND carry some baby wipes with me. I don't want to risk this happening again.

Ironically, I'm a bit unusual in that I *don't* enjoy my balls being sucked or even fondled -- they are just too sensitive. But I'll shave them anyway for hygiene reasons.

-- Modified on 7/2/2012 3:48:57 PM

Thanks for the replies everyone.

I agree that she must have been burned out and/or having a terrible day. Then when she was confronted with a client that she probably wasn't attracted to, she was ready to snap at the slightest thing that bothered her.

As you say, it probably wasn't going to be a good session no matter what.

-- Modified on 7/2/2012 3:59:20 PM

You know about this shaving trimming thing...I personally don't mind what a guy does. It will effect what I can do but I respect his choice as he should respect mine. Above all, cleanliness is next to "what-she-will do-ness'".

A nice trim is appreciated, no need to go baby ass smooth.

cause you got it in spades.  All those good reviews, you just never know.  As far as seeing touring ladies, and I see them, I always try and be the first appointment of the day.  That way you're not jerked around with all the juggling of the other appointments.  Remember, the lady is only in town for a certain amount of time and juggling of appointments can be a real pain.

As far as the question about alcohol, I've never been asked that when I called for the room #. In hindsight it was a tipoff, but you really had no idea.  The talking about reviews, during the exchange of emails trying to set up an appointment is something I try to avoid. Yes, if I give them my handle they can certainly see I write reviews, but I don't bring it up and if the provider brings it up in an email, I just ignore it.  Her comment she didn't want any reviews even though she had plenty is a red flag.
I do not see providers who have a no review policy, what can I say, that's my policy.

As far shaving, since I'm single I shave, I use the Norelco body shaving, it works like a charm, no runs, no nicks, no errors. You can get them on line at Amazon or any big box store.

Finally you're going at one hell of a pace, 9 providers in one month.  I know it's like being a kid in a candy shop, you might want to slow down a little. Otherwise, you'll burn yourself out.

Enjoy!

Quote:

Just to be clear, I didn't give her my TER handle during the screening process, but I would have been happy to had she asked. So her "no review" proclamation had nothing to do with my review history. Even if she did somehow get my handle, I've only posted one review and it was very positive with a 9/10 rating.

I am indeed on a crazy pace. One of my appointments was even a duo, lol.   I'm going to need to slow down for bankroll reasons if nothing else.

-- Modified on 7/2/2012 3:59:38 PM

You have responded incredibly well to all sorts of comments and even decided to do what is necessary, or thought to be necessary. FWIW, the lady you were with did not handle herself or the situation well at all and I applaud you for your patience and don't blame you for feeling upset after the session.

I have a very sensitive nose and I admit certain things can get to me more than others. However, I have no problem starting off with a couples shower if I feel it's needed. That way I can take care of business.

You will do well because you're open to suggestion, did not get all defensive and actually care about how the ladies feel. I thank you, and I am sure many ladies will. Take care and may your next encounter be wonderful!!

END OF MESSAGE

If it was just a smell thing, I would have handled it a lot differently. The "I can't do this anymore" thing, pretty much sums up how she feels about herself and the men she sees.

Apparently, swim too!
Maybe we were thinking about you?

Quote:

Thank you for writing that FF, and that's an interesting hypothesis.

Her photos had a blurred out face, which is pretty standard and I have no problem with it. Her body seemed to match both her photos and the physical description on her profile (height, weight, cup size, implants or natural, etc). Her reviews give her mostly 9's and 10's for looks, and this girl was indeed gorgeous, I'll give her that. So I have no reason to doubt it was her on that basis.

I do, however, have suspicions about her review history. By that I mean there could be an intentional (or even unintentional) "selection bias" going on here. Maybe she tells every new client, as she did with me, she prefers not to be reviewed. Then if she likes the guy and/or is in the proper mood to perform (or whatever) and has a hot session, she changes her mind and requests a review. I can state that if we had had a good session and she subsequently requested a review, I would have obliged.  

Also, without giving too much away which could identify her, I searched her posting history and noticed she is *very* vigilant about policing her profile for what she feels are unfair or fraudulent reviews. I have absolutely no problem with that either, but it does show her mindset that she is quite concerned about keeping an unblemished review record.

Quote:

As a matter of fact, I had already made an appointment with another provider for two days after when the bad session happened. I almost canceled that appointment, but I didn't want to do that to the provider (who had been particularly nice in our e-mail/text communication), and I thought I should "get right back on the horse" so to speak.

I was nervous going into that appointment, but it went great; she seemed really into it. After the sex, I told her about my previous bad appointment (without revealing the identity of the provider) and implored her to be honest as to whether I have a hygiene issue. She said she would tell me diplomatically if I did, but she thought I tasted and smelled just fine, and she didn't think I was too hairy.

That was my first thought.  Maybe she was the provider's sister (so she looked like the photos) or something.  It sounded like she was nervous and not very professional.   The other thought I had was, maybe she contacted someone who had seen you as a provider reference and the other provider told her you were unclean.  I mean it seems weird that she was concerned about your hygiene and whether or not you were shaved BEFORE you got undressed.  So maybe she had heard something that spooked her.  Who knows?

You are obviously a Gentleman with a kind caring heart, and a Positive thinker!
I am So glad you went through with a new date! And many more to CUM !  
Stay sexy bb, have a Great time exploring!
XO FF

...is also and maybe more so for safety (rob, b&s, rip-off) and stay away from LE. Yes, it is also to see that she has a history of providing good service and to see that she offers what you are looking for. I wouldn't use one incident or even a few to throw out the conventional wisdom. Sometimes no matter what you do shit happens.

END OF MESSAGE

...because tomorrow I'm flying to Vegas for a week long vacation. I'll see how the lovely ladies in Sin City like my new "look."  

Yes I did have that I'm being eaten alive feeling......did you happen to notice the big smile and grin I had on my face for that 45 min BBJ that had ME curling my toes.....LOL....?....

do you have your dates lined up ? if not, I would love to meet you send me a PM

I would certainly like to meet you too, but alas, I do already have my dates lined up. In fact, I started seeing providers in my city because I wanted the references to be able to book whomever I wanted during this Vegas trip. Then I kinda went crazy with it and had far more dates than I needed for references because you ladies (well, most of you) are so damn awesome!

It doesn't look like I could PM you anyway because you are using an alias, right?

You just have to type out the alias correctly in the "to" box.