Hey all. Cap is back. Just wondering how many of the admirers here are "out"? How many of your friends, family,better halves (Ha) know what you like, what you do on your computer? It's obvious from a lot of the posts not many. You ever notice some people post only very late at night (after their partner went to bed), or only during the day (while they're at work). Are there any of you who have bared themselves to the world? Were there repercussions? What were they? Why haven't you let the world know who you love? These are the questions people want to know the answers to. These answers will allow you to express your feelings, get it out, realize that there are others, many, out there feeling the same as you. There will be acceptance some day for everyone. This is how it starts.
Cap out!
GOOD POST CAPT!!!!!!!!!!!
Honestly, I don't have the balls to air our my dirty laundry. My wife would neve beleive it
if she knew. I know for sure that she does not suspect anything nor does anyone else in my life. I am usually careful to cover my tracks, either after I have been with a provider or surfing on the web and wacking off. I do kow that I have a real attraction to both!!
Thanks for the great topice, I hope others reply.
I'm afraid I'm deeply closeted. I don't believe my SO knows I'm involved in the hobby, much less with TSs. She would probably freak and since there are children involved it would be ugly.
As for my friends, one knows I'm in the hobby, he doesn't know I've done it with transsexuals.
I can't believe how many married guys come on this board, say how great their marriage is, they love their wife and kids, and yet, see no problem with seeing escorts and TS escorts at that. I guess I'm so shocked because I KNOW a lot of guys engage in risky behavior even though they would swear on the lives of their children that they play safe.
So... is there any guilt? How can you do it? Or as long as the wife doesn't find out it's all good?
Yes there's guilt, but I deal with it. I'd like to think in a perfect marriage I wouldn't cheat and for the first 20+ years that was true, but over time life has taken its toll on our relationship. I'm sure the "honorable" thing to do would be to go ahead and get divorced, but with one kid in college and another soon to be there, the financial hit would be more than I'm williing to tolerate (insert criticism here). I try to be discreet and practice (relatively) safe sex, but I'm not denying there is some risk and irresponsibility associated with my behavior.
Sorry if my attitude offends you, but if you're looking for purity and honesty I suspect you're on the wrong discussion board.
my wife likes girls and we share that , i have not shared a ts with my wife, she would love to but i cant do it,she wishes that i was into guys but guys are a total turn off to me ,i cant even share a girl with another guy, it just wont get hard,i guess i just dont want my wife watching me take it up the ass or sucking off a ts , it would not bother her in the least but it would bother me, i keep the two seperate.
You amaze me. My respect for you knows no bounds. I am honored to share the same internet with you.
I'm not being sarcastic, I am very impressed by the amount of honesty in your relationship. I wish I felt that I could do that and remain married.
If your wife is reading this, I hope she brings home a TS that you don't recognize and are surprised when it turns out she's not a girl. I would love to find another girl that I can share a TS with.
""I try to be discreet and practice (relatively) safe sex, but I'm not denying there is some risk and irresponsibility associated with my behavior.
Sorry if my attitude offends you, but if you're looking for purity and honesty I suspect you're on the wrong discussion board.""
I'm not offended really. Just trying to understand how people deal with it and justify it. Maybe I'm the only one that feels this way, but I think it's scary how people will endanger the lives of their partners without any regard for them. Sure, you know and accept the risks you take, but if your partner doesn't know, then I don't see how you could so casually, and potentially, but their life in danger.
I know better than to look for honesty and purity on these boards... I'm only looking for honest answers.
Thinking with the small head, plus an unhealthy dose of denial.
You're right I can't justify this and don't really try. I suspect thats the source of the guilt. I don't have any profound insights here, I've just learned to live with the contradiction. I know its unfair, but I think the only realistic alternative is to grow a set and ask for a divorce. Don't hold your breath waiting for that to happen.
A few. Not completely. None. See above answer. My world knows. That being said, I'm kind of disappointed in the responses. It's a sad commentary when you can't even come out of the closet sequestered secretly behind your alias IN YOUR OWN GOD DAMN FORUM! Only you know who you are. Christ, there's a long way to go.
I found myself attracted to TS's when there was only a few providers advertising on the web. That isn't even too long ago. I am amazed at the evolution of gender-bending in just a handful of years.
You must ask yourself: "What is to be gained by 'coming out'"? For gays, it was all the shame rapped around an identity that needed to be released. There was a need to 'come out' and legitemize the lifestyle.
Not the same for TS lovers. Seeking TS sexuality is a hobby. Some people like water sports. Do they need to come out and tell everyone about it? No, it is their private business and must be treated as such. As in the case of many other fetishes. How many people share their love for foot fetish with others?
The fact remains that people have fetishes for different reasons. We don't care. One person's fetish may be completely repulsive to another. So we don't share them. We don't want the reaction.
That being said, if you have a specific fetish (and you own up to it) then it is easier to accept someone else's different and perhaps repulsive-to-you fetish. But not necessarily so. So it is just better keep your fetishes to yourself.
The most important thing is to erase the guilt. Let me tell you something, I was talking to a TS provider once and she told me that people call her scared out of their wits. She told me some people have called her repeatedly over a certain period of time but just couldn't muster up the courage to come for visit.
So hats off to all of you folks here. It looks like you didn't get stuck on the same track. You got your courage up (and I know everyone of you had to do that when you started to go the TS route) and sailed into the uncharted teritory.
My wife finally came out that she was curious and we began to go to a very upscale swing club. She likes women and even better, she loves watching me with other women. Then the day came when I watched her suck someone elses cock and loved it. A few weeks later we are watching a porno (Jill Kelly riding some guy reverse cowboy) and I turned to her and said I would love to take that cock out of her and suck it. Thus began my journey. My wife did not want to see me with another guy but allowed me to explore on my own.
I wanted to try sucking SO BAD but found myself not attracted to men at all. The urge just got so bad that I finally did it at a cruising spot. While I loved the act, men still turn me off. I hate watching gay porn but love watching 2 bi guys with a girl. 2 Guys kissing makes me sick but I will suck their cocks as long as my wife or another woman is there. I then began to study gloryholes on the web. All the cock without the guy. Perfect. I began showing my wife some pictures and she finally understood that I was not attracted to men, just cock. I began checking them out in the area and saw what type of men were behind the whole. It looked like my chances were now slim that I would ever actually to enjoy giving head.
Then one night at a big city club, I think someone slipped something into my drink b/c I had lost all inhibitions and told my wife tonight is the night. We began our drive to a gay club to find someone that would be gentle and allow me to experiment. On the way there, while stopped at a light, I noticed what I thought at the time were crossdressers but they were hot. I called one over to our car and explained I was dying to suck. She looked at me and said I would let you suck me right here if your girl was not passed out". I looked over and sure enough, she was out cold.
Even though nothing happened, I knew that I had found what was perfect for me, a hot girl with a cock. Even though my wife still does not want to watch me with one, I have been honest with her. Too many men are curious but it is still taboo. Chances are though if you tell your wife, she may get turned on bi it.
I get turned on by doing something that so many would consider forbidden. She still has to be beautiful in my eyes and have a friendly attitude but the taboo definitely puts the experience over the top. I haven't told anyone. I never feel ashamed either. I don't think it's really wrong but if everyone began to feel that way I think I would get bored with it.