I'm quite confident that I could get laid without paying for it on an hourly basis, I've done it, but it would only ever be with the kind of woman that I'm not attracted to.
GaG said this once, and it's poignant, "FREE is way more than I can afford". Fuck it! Spend an unknown, but assuredly high cost over a long, painstakingly arduous period of time for uninspired, lackluster sex with a woman who I'm not attracted to; or, pay a known amount for great times with a beautiful, sexy woman who is really, very good sexually and not have to listen to bullshit or deal with nagging. No Brainer! I most assuredly would PREFER to HAVE to pay, I'm paying either way.
So I've been told that you don't pay escorts for sex. You pay them to leave, without drama, when it's done.
I somewhat agree. You definitely are paying for the sex. But you are able to enjoy that sex because of the lack of drama when they leave.
I kind of think of civvie dating vs. The Hobby as eating out (at a restaurant, mind out of the reviews, I mean gutter) versus cooking for yourself. Some restaurants do things you could never do yourself, but most restaurants offer something that with enough time and work you could eventually make at home. But if you can afford it, you go to the restaurant because it's so much easier to just go, order what you want, eat, pay, enjoy and leave Similarly, I think most guys on this board could get it on their own fine, but it's just not worth the trouble. The no drama the end with an escort is equivalent to not having to wash the dishes and clean the kitchen. So the "leave" part of the deal is a big plus, but maybe only half to a third of the total deal, but not all you are paying for.
Agree? Disagree?
Sure, some of us could get laid the old fashioned way, and some of us still do enjoy a sex life outside of the hooker world, but if you had ever been to a M&G you would have found a huge number of guys in this little hobby of ours who would NEVER get laid without a fist full of hundreds combined with women in desperate need of that money.
Could I get laid without hookers or SB's? Of course I could, Could I find a different hot 20 something for every day of the week willing to jump into my bed? Hell fucking no.
So yes, I do like the fact that hookers go away and leave you alone once your time is up, but I'd be lying to you and myself if I tried to pretend it's the only reason I do this.
There are two kinds of hobbyists: Those that HAVE to pay, and those that PREFER to pay.
I'm quite confident that I could get laid without paying for it on an hourly basis, I've done it, but it would only ever be with the kind of woman that I'm not attracted to.
GaG said this once, and it's poignant, "FREE is way more than I can afford".
Fuck it! Spend an unknown, but assuredly high cost over a long, painstakingly arduous period of time for uninspired, lackluster sex with a woman who I'm not attracted to; or, pay a known amount for great times with a beautiful, sexy woman who is really, very good sexually and not have to listen to bullshit or deal with nagging.
No Brainer! I most assuredly would PREFER to HAVE to pay, I'm paying either way.
I can get laid all day long by milfy gym moms that are packing 20 pounds too much, but I'm attracted to 30yo thin Asian girls. That's why I PREFER to pay too. Nevertheless, there are guys here that don't really have a choice. They have no game and no idea how to seduce a civvie woman. Mostly younger guys who grew up texting rather than talking to girls.
Totally On point!!!
I'm one of the ones that adores!!!
Do you recall a mutual friend recently went to one and reported she saw a guy there with a HUGE boil in the middle of his forehead. He would have been one of the better looking ones, I believe.
One lady of my acquaintance said - you just look for that one thing that is good with them - and go with that - and there is almost always one thing. And if you can't find it - get through it - and don't ever see them again.
I kind of agree with most of that.
I have my own reasons for recently returning as a "hobbyist" as we like the term.
I don't have many troubles dating in the real world either. 20's, hmm... Late 20's I have a few times, but now it's mainly in the 30's and up.
Interesting about the M&G's. Thinking of attended one in late spring/early summer. I'm confident enough in myself that I'm not a nerdy, etc..., what you described that shows up. If true, perhaps I definitely Should go. lol... Some providers my like that I'm there. ha! I'm no Brad Pitt, but no dinky doughnut either. lol...
But yeah Ga, not a bad answer. (Admit, still re-reading the OP to get a Full Clear grasp on the actual question...)
I've made a couple of deep connections, one in Particular, that I haven't seen or felt since I was engaged with my first love in my late teens through early 20's. Sessions are that intense in a Passionate way. Not what all we did or didn't do. Hard to describe.
Do I like that they go away, don't know. Maybe one reason is I try to stay very Low Volume Myself?
It's said mostly in jest (but for some celebrities is is probably true.) I think it is used more for SB relationships or regulars where the drama can be about losing her revenue stream.
As far as some guys not being able to get laid, well, the world isn't all beautiful babes either. There's always someone for everyone.
... I had that as a theme in a short play I was working on, so at least back then that was my feeling. Now it's a little more complicated.
For me these days, paying an escort is about more than just making sure there's no obligation at the end. It's about establishing a particular kind of trust, a knowledge that you're pretty sure where this encounter is going, or as in many transactions, you're paying for experience, expertise, special knowledge of the craft that you just can't get from an "amateur". She's a professional. Part of the package is expertise, and part of it is limited engagement.
So nowadays, paying for an encounter means that I value what will happen during that encounter, as well as the fact that when it's done, we both walk away knowing that a fair trade has taken place.
I don't want my accountant hanging out with me on the weekends, but I'm sure glad that he's a beast between the spreadsheets.
When I find a certain lady, I truly enjoy her company. She most likely rocked my world. I don't pay her to leave, I pay her to handle our meeting in a professional manner, and devoid of drama. That is one of the reasons I've not considered an SB.
Am I the only one who gets the irony of saying that with an alias?
who assumes that alias is a dude.
Not so ironic the other way round, eh?
Are you saying that you don't have a penis? Way to go! I guess we won't see that alias again.
Not so ironic the other way round, eh?
I didn't expect better, though.
Like the saying goes, No expectations , No disappointment
But at least he knew not to expect much of a retort from you.
-- Modified on 3/28/2017 11:16:52 AM
Sorry knocked out before the sweet 16
I'm usually a little disappointed when the clock strikes time, so I presume I am paying them for their time (whether that be sex, drinks, dinner, etc..) spent with me.
If you're glad to see her back on the way out, then I suppose you paid her to leave.
Most of the time I'm disappointed that our time is up and I never rush them out the door if they want to stay.
I think it is more of an issue for the ladies, having to get us to leave, vs. the other way around.
Don't get me wrong, one of the reasons I love this playground is the "no strings attached" aspect of it, but sometimes one or two hours is not enough. I guess I'll have to enroll in JDU and learn how to negotiate those longer appointments. 😎
-- Modified on 3/28/2017 6:50:46 PM
Oh make no mistake I'm paying for sex and all the goodie that goes with it. Could I get laid without p4p? Yep.
Ever seen somebody married get caught with a co-worker, neighbor, buddies wife, gal he met at a bar? Chaos ensues that includes difficulties with marriage, employment, living conditions, friendships and those friends marriages. During all this there will undoubtedly be a few versions of "it meant nothing only sex, etc" thrown out there.
Not for me. If I get caught it will be plain that it was not a relationship...only sex. And there won't be any devastated buddies or "you're fired" or drama down the street. Just an increase in my activity after my divorce!
Sometimes you want to have "fun" outside of marriage (particularly when the "fun" isn't happening all that much in the marriage). I tried the Ashley Madison thing several years ago (before the data breach), and while I did manage to get some tail, I was terrified the entire time that it would end up ruining my life. The escort approach is a thousand times better. Is there a risk that I'll get found out? Sure, the risk is never zero. But the odds of a well-reviewed professional boiling the pet rabbit is negligible compared to a civilian doing the same thing.
Also, I can ask an escort to do things that the missus wouldn't even consider. 
Hi Craigshep74!
I'm really curious.. what was AM like? How many ladies did you meet, how much time did you have to put into it and were these indeed just people like most of us, looking for something different or were they more looking for a sugar set-up?
This was before the big data breach, and I haven't been back since, so I can't tell you how it is now. Even before the breach, I had already decided I was done. I did meet a few ladies, mostly in their early 40's and varying degrees of overweight. There is a reason, after all, that these women aren't getting what they need at home. I got laid, but decided it was too much work, and too risky. A woman doesn't want an affair because she wants sex. What she wants is attention, and that takes time and energy. I already have a wife that demands that; I didn't need to be providing that for an additional woman when all I really wanted was the sex.
For the most part, there seem to be two types of guys doing this. Younger guys (under 45) who make great money but have zero social skills. Older guys (over 45) who are usually married and have little to no sex life with the wife.
Both parties are buying "sex on demand." Hell yes some of us just want to use their body for our own personal pleasure and pay em to leave.
There is SOME truth in the points presented here.
Having been to a few M&Gs, I can attest to the fact that it reminds me a bit of a junior high dance, with a lot of the guys in attendance nervously sipping their drinks while eyeing the ladies from across the room. There are a few of us who walk in, survey things and walk up to a likely candidate and introduce ourselves. It's called "working the room" and most of the women there are quite good at it and will recognize a kindred spirit. After doing this for a while, I'll also talk with some of the guys as well, and help introduce them to some of the ladies I've gotten to know -- just my way of giving back
As for sex in the civvie world, I have no shortage of opportunity but my own life precludes an SO at this time (I'm taking care of an elderly parent and Mom shares a house with me). Having no personal privacy for me was a major contributing factor to the breakup of my last civvie relationship and it's only gotten worse in the intervening 4+ years.
So I find that the p4p life is a better option for now, even if I have to travel a minimum of 2 1/2 hours one way to get to a larger population center with a pool of providers with whom I'd feel comfortable (it's hell living in a small rural town where EVERYBODY knows you and your business). If I want to really have some fun, it's a 4 1/2 hour one-way drive, so that's a long weekend trip.
So, yes, I pay for play -- probably the way it will be for me for the foreseeable future.
Women need money, Men want sex. Perfect business arraignment.
He was paying for BBFS and look where that got that snarky SOB.