Minnesota

Reference Checking...
TrinityLake See my TER Reviews 1725 reads
posted

I just got the reference information I requested from a guy requesting to see me.  However, he did not JUST give me the ad for the girl he saw, he included the entire email conversation he had with her which included her address!!!  I didn't read it or look at what the address was, I just realized that that was what it was!  I emailed the provider letting her know what happened, and I responded to him telling him what he did, that he made a huge mistake, I hope he learns his lesson, and never to contact me again.  

Should I do anything else?

You may want to take this up on the provider board. Another example though of why its a so risky for providers to host sessions out of their residence or even a static incall apt.

I never give the address out over email... NEVER.  I have requested to be able to go on the provider boards by TER, and they said I haven't posted enough, yet.  I am guessing they mean on here, so I'm trying.  If there's any providers out there that see this and want to give a heads up on the provider boards, feel free.  I just am not allowed on, yet.

As a massage gal, I'm sure you meet lots of newbs. Just take a moment to educate him about discretion. There's many local massage providers  that no longer allow reviews because of crap like this. Giving out too many details about incall, discussing incall location, private residence vs. apt.. blah blah blah. Too much information doesn't help anyone except LE to bust your ass.
Also, you may not want to offer your incall address via email. That might be a great time to pick up the phone and offer directions.
Getting upset is natural. Just turn it into a teaching moment and then he will be a better hobbyist for it.
Best of luck to you!

Posted By: TrinityLake
I just got the reference information I requested from a guy requesting to see me.  However, he did not JUST give me the ad for the girl he saw, he included the entire email conversation he had with her which included her address!!!  I didn't read it or look at what the address was, I just realized that that was what it was!  I emailed the provider letting her know what happened, and I responded to him telling him what he did, that he made a huge mistake, I hope he learns his lesson, and never to contact me again.  

Should I do anything else?

Let's clarify something here. Providers are always passing hobbyist's personal information around and most of the abusers of personal info are providers, not hobbyists. In addition, providers are posting personal information of hobbyists on public blacklists every day for minor offenses.

What this guy did was dumb, so don't see him. So what do you mean by "should I do anything else"?

justElle1024 reads

Trinity has made the right moves. She's simply asking for input to be certain since she cannot access the provider boards for chat. This is a difficult position to be in as a new provider- When we need to speak with more experienced providers the most, we can't.

Enough grouping providers into being "abusers" guilty of indiscretion.  We're not your enemies.

I don't think there is anything more you can do. You have pointed out the foolishness. It is up to them to learn the lesson.

I am unsure who I think was more at fault in that case.

The guy screwed up, for sure. He shouldn't have sent you the information. But possibly he didn't remember everything contained in the email thread he forwarded. If so, he was negligent, but not 'malicious.' Of course, that he had saved the email thread at all makes him a bad risk if you're hoping for discretion. If clients are going to whine that providers should not save our information, which we certainly do, frequently and at length, then we owe them the same courtesy.

The woman, though, intentionally put her address in an email which is very troublesome. Emails and text messages persist forever on servers. Google, Yahoo, Comcast, et. al., respond promptly to subpoenas. If LE or an angry spouse ever come looking, her address is low hanging fruit to be plucked and used against her. When there are a couple dozen, or hundred, clients who got the same email, the risk to her becomes significant. Things like addresses should only be communicated by voice. He may write it down on a scrap of paper, but the odds of retrieving that scrap of paper a month later are pretty long.

It is true that simply deleting an email or text doesn't immediately overwrite the data but the space that was used will no longer be marked as in use and at some point will get overwritten.  Even if it has not been overwritten, finding it may be quite difficult and require resources that LE is unlikely to spend unless there are more serious crimes involved.  Certainly, you should not keep emails and texts around but I don't agre that they are as risky as you think.  But if you want to be safer, then voice is the way to go.

Hopefully this was just  screw up on his part that he will learn from and not representative of how he does things.

"You just included the email chain, including address, of another provider!  I hope you learn your lesson from this well.  We are done.  Please do not contact me again."

I don't mean to be rude to a newbie, but I felt it was a serious enough offense to slap him electronically for it.  I want his lesson to be learned, but I don't think I need to spell it out for him.  I can't take the chance that he might NOT learn his lesson even if I DON'T put my address on email!

However, I think this is an uphill battle for you. It seems that a majority of massage providers in this town don't require references and do not do ANY screening prior to meeting someone. Heck, nowadays, it seems over half of them don't even schedule their own appointments. Getting references from other massage providers might warrant more of a hassle and headache than a helpful hand.
I do appreciate your screening tactics though. Just goes to show that there are still a few intelligent, independent massage ladies left! My favorite kind!!

Thanks. I know it can be a pain at first, but everyone is happy when they do, as far as I'm aware.  I just want to be careful, and I want to encourage others to do the same :)

I am smart, and I also make up for the effort.

What you sent to him didn't explain the problem or the change he could make... he might not understand! You should have elaborated about why you didn't like the email chain he sent and why an address could be incriminating - he should have taken it out of the email. For a newbie, a short and sour message like you sent isn't a good way to point them in the right direction, it probably scared it! Come here, newbie, newbie, newbie ;) Lol.

Posted By: TrinityLake
I just got the reference information I requested from a guy requesting to see me.  However, he did not JUST give me the ad for the girl he saw, he included the entire email conversation he had with her which included her address!!!  I didn't read it or look at what the address was, I just realized that that was what it was!  I emailed the provider letting her know what happened, and I responded to him telling him what he did, that he made a huge mistake, I hope he learns his lesson, and never to contact me again.  

Should I do anything else?

I did tell him what he did wrong, and I don't email my address, so that couldn't have happened to me.  However, I don't want anyone else to ever see my emails to anyone.

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