A lady is ...

Many things and I have found a lot of wonderful friendships in the past 15 months.We hang out ,go to movies, dinner, trips .Heck even hiked to top of stone mountain last year with a well known lady.
 I guess what I'm trying to say is ....after a long marriage, I'm having a blast and for me it's not something I would consider right now.
 But heck yeah I can see how it could happen and there are even a few guys married to providers and hobbying ,and say they make it work and are happy .
 I know of two ladies that dated guys they met and so far I have not seen or heard from them so.... yep .
It just takes two people wanting same thing IMHO.

Date a Provider for Real?

in the right situation i could see it happening.  it can't be something u purposely look for, though.

People are people.

I wouldn't tho.

Well therein lies the "Pretty Woman" conundrum: how does a working girl from the "other" side of town like Vivian meet a handsome, rich gentleman like Richard in the first place without being a girl for hire?

The harsh but honest answer is they don't. More often than not, they run in completely different circles (or mostly separate ones at best). "Fitting" into every world is NOT the same as actually living in every world.

Such a great question Caitlin. I did date a dancer who is now an UTR provider. We are still close but it was just too brutal. From a guys perspective, it is almost impossible to do if the relationship is going to have any depth. I wish it would have worked but I think we both knew deep inside it could not work. I have met some amazing women in this business who blow civies away from a personality and intellectual standpoint though. And yes the jealousy thing comes into play...again I cannot see how it wouldn't.

I am seriously dating a lady I met in the hobby.   I know about her, she knows about me.  No secrets.

We are discussing marriage and children as long term opportunity.  We are not there yet, but we are working on it.

If you are not all hung up, anything is possible.

I believe I could...

...but they never want to date me. I see a lot of gents and ladies that try it, do it, break up, etc. but even though I try if I really like a chick, it doesn't seem to ever go that way. CK is a prime example HA!

Guess I'm just not that cool.

Sir Cumalot

It is between two adults and depends on their maturity.

I once new a girl from Australia, told me she was a stripper but I felt it was more than that. Fell in love, what can you do? But surely it isn't sustainable...

It really depends on the lady, both have to be understanding, but I don't see how a serious relationship, with commitment, can be had, of if either the man or the woman are still in the hobby.  Even if it is work, it would be daily, doing something that actually violates a serious committed relationship.  Again, I see nothing wrong with it, after both are out of the hobby.

In many ways this is no different than asking the "come from different worlds" question.  Let's set aside the professional aspect for a minute.  I like to think of myself as an open, minimally prejudiced, non-judgemental person.  My ex-wife is a demonstration of this- not my religion, not my economic class, not my social background.  Our divorce was not about these differences but about the personality differences that inevitably became unbearable.  BUT, these differences made life more difficult as we tried to merge our pre-marriage lives.  Our friends' prejudices were the problem more than ours.  I am not suggesting you are any where near the stage of dating someone that you would marry but I am suggesting the more obstacles you have the more difficult it will be.  You are living in a world of secrets and confidences that cannot be shared with your partner.  If you did, you might be making him complicit in the crimes, to be blunt about it.  Anybody on this site who has been in a serious relationship can tell you that keeping secrets from each other is one of the main problems with making a relationship work.

I would not care if one of my male friends (or female for that matter!) dated a professional, whether a stripper or a prostitute.  My prejudices run in a different direction but is he willing to give up his friends because of the way they may react.  Are you willing to give up your business friends because of the way they may react?

You put yourself in a tough situation going down this path.  It might be fun and that may be all you're looking for and perfectly acceptable but if you are looking for being part of each others lives, to whatever degree then you are heading for difficulties.

Have fun and be safe.

Z

I married a provider... When she moved in with me (a year before we were married) I made her retire from the biz. She was glad to quit, risky biz... Also no drugs... We have been married 8+ years. Things are great with us!

On a personal basis I would date a provider without hesitation.  On a career basis that presents multiple problems.  I am in a profession where a lot of people know who I am and it would not be helpful if word got out that I was dating, or married, to an escort.  It is the same issue as going to an open swing club in Atlanta-the last thing I need is to have, say, a secretary see me there and live with the fear that word would get out among my co-workers.  If my profession did not involve so many people and if public image was not important, then I would date an escort openly without hesitation.  Often the choices we made in the past tend to limit the choices you make today.

Date, yes. Marry, no.

The truth is that if I were single, I would have no problem dating a Provider as long as she also understood that I too might be having sex with complete strangers on occasion.  

The harder question is, would I marry a Provider and the answer is a resounding No.  I just couldn't mentally get past her past, nor could I constantly worry about entering into business or social situations where another guy in the room may have paid for sex with my wife in the recent past.  I just couldn't get past the head issues that this would bring to the marriage and the provider/lady would deserve better than that.

It has it's unique challenges, but it can work.

I could date a provider, but it would be more of a 'fuck buddy' relationship with no emotional attachment until she quit the business.  Would be a little awkward coming home and asking "honey, how was your day"?

I did it for years and it was fine. It beat the heck out of my previous str8 relationship (eom)

I'd go into detail but too many in ATL seem to like keeping a data base. Weird

I think it could be a great match. If I were in this situation, i would be be a bit worried about her safety meeting unknowns but i also think it would be awesome to not have to hide your hobbying from her either.

CK, great question.  I don't do reviews and I don't post, but your question motivated me to answer. I would have no problem dating a provider. I have only seen one woman over the last few years.  We have developed a great friendship and are friends outside the hobby.  We are not dating, although I would like too and she knows it! LOL..  I think we are very compatible and personally have no issue with her career.   The way I view it, she makes people happy...including me.   I wish my job allowed me to make people that happy!  I have no jealous streak in me and never have or would ask about her other clients.  She ENJOYS what she does, is very good at it ,  supports her family, and for that I have a LOT of respect for her.  Also, I think it would be kinda sexy to be with a woman who enjoys sex that much and yet, we could have "our" thing.  To each is own, but for me no issue at all and would NOT want her to quit doing what she loves.

I'm sure you're a very sweet girl given that you've even put this out here.  You're obviously looking for something special that you think and may deserve (I don't know you).  But to think that you could get a sincere and genuine relationship from this environment is not realistic.  And I guarantee you, every one of these guys that says "Sure!  Great!" is looking for out of his league eye candy.

For something meaningful, that you sound like you deserve, you'll have to go outside of this world and keep this quiet.